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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
feeling guilty for my homeless 20yr.old son
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 629658" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>You need to let go of the guilt... remember you didnt cause it, you cant control it and you cant cure it!!! Really he is making the choices he is making and it is those choices that made him homeless.... and if he has money then let him use it to take care of himself. If you let him come home then you will just make it easier for him to buy and sell drugs and you dont want any part of that.</p><p></p><p>My experience has been that when my son was homeless that was eventually when he would decide he wanted help and go for treatment. And although i still dont have a good ending and I dont know if he has ever really been serious about recovery, those periods of sobriety were good for him and helped him and he made some progress each time.</p><p></p><p>So I think you are doing the right thing. You need to find some support for you... I really recommend finding an alanon group for parents. I started going to alanon when my difficult child was in jail for the first time.... 3.5 years ago. I was a total wreck and cried through my whole meeting. At the time it felt like the worst thing a mother could go through was having a kid in jail and I just was in a really tough place. Now my son is in jail again (3rd time) and it is barely phasing me (at least in comparison to before). I am not miserable at all. I am enjoying my life... and yes at moments it is hard but mostly I am glad he is not on the streets and is safe.</p><p></p><p>TL</p><p></p><p></p><p>Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 629658, member: 15801"] You need to let go of the guilt... remember you didnt cause it, you cant control it and you cant cure it!!! Really he is making the choices he is making and it is those choices that made him homeless.... and if he has money then let him use it to take care of himself. If you let him come home then you will just make it easier for him to buy and sell drugs and you dont want any part of that. My experience has been that when my son was homeless that was eventually when he would decide he wanted help and go for treatment. And although i still dont have a good ending and I dont know if he has ever really been serious about recovery, those periods of sobriety were good for him and helped him and he made some progress each time. So I think you are doing the right thing. You need to find some support for you... I really recommend finding an alanon group for parents. I started going to alanon when my difficult child was in jail for the first time.... 3.5 years ago. I was a total wreck and cried through my whole meeting. At the time it felt like the worst thing a mother could go through was having a kid in jail and I just was in a really tough place. Now my son is in jail again (3rd time) and it is barely phasing me (at least in comparison to before). I am not miserable at all. I am enjoying my life... and yes at moments it is hard but mostly I am glad he is not on the streets and is safe. TL Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app [/QUOTE]
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feeling guilty for my homeless 20yr.old son
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