Feeling guilty

[TheyAreLegallyAdultsNow]

It does make me sad that I can't give my daughter the same trust I give my other children , like $5 for "tampons" because I figure she's putting it on on a blunt.

difficult child's make such terrible choices... a blunt would make a terrible tampon... terribly expensive, and I'm sure not nearly as absorbent.

LOL... couldn't help but giggle at where my imagination took me with this one.

Hope it made you smile for a minute too!!!

 

[toughlovin]

I think this is a tough one. Certainly holding strong and giving her nothing towards food is a reasonable choice. I have thought about this for myself and if my son came to me asking for money for food (which he hasn't yet but has been arrested for shoplifting for food) I think I would take him some groceries. No way would I give him money and I would not want to give him a gift card for similar reasons as you gave.... but I could see buying him some groceries. Of course that means going to where he is to deliver them....

 

[Bean]

Hope it made you smile for a minute too!!!

Haha!! Yes, that it did. LOL.

 

[Nomad]

LOL! Re difficult child tampon alternative

Our difficult child is on food stamps. We give her a gift card to the food store once a month to supplement and sometimes if we are going out of town for a long period of timetime ...a second food store gift card. Now and again, we give her left overs. She is expected to budget her food and if she fails to do so, we hold her accountable. We don't bail her out if she messes up. She has enough food for the month. If there is a problem, it is simply because she did not pay attention to her food. In the past, she has used the food bank at the local church to fill in gaps when she misjudges...which sadly...is fairly often.

 

[jbrain]

Hey, I should update this thread. I called E a couple of nights ago but she didn't answer. Then she called me back. She said she hadn't been able to make herself call me because she felt ashamed. I told her I want to have a relationship with her, that I care about her.

She says she moved out of the house she'd been staying at with her friends and is at a women's shelter. She said they were drinking and doing drugs and she didn't want to mess things up before she goes in the Navy. She also said she was tired of "hustling" people for money. So, at least my instincts were right--she was hustling me, not needing money for food.

So, I don't know if the newest story is true but I am glad I didn't give her the 50 dollars and I'm glad I waited to try to talk to her. She is still saying she is entering the Navy on Aug. 10th so I kind of think that is true. I will find out once that date comes because I should receive her personal belongings and a packet of info from the Navy if she really has joined.

I have mixed opinions of whether I think she can make it through bootcamp or not. In some ways she is very tough and she certainly does well with structure. But, I don't know if her mental and emotional problems will hinder her or not. Well, it isn't in my control so I try not worry too much. I just think if they kick her out of boot camp she will really go off the deep end.

--Jane