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Parent Emeritus
Feeling like most disloyal mom ever
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<blockquote data-quote="svengandhi" data-source="post: 679612" data-attributes="member: 3493"><p>I remember being 18 years and in the throes of first love when my boyfriend's mother sat down with me and begged me to leave right then and there and never look back. She promised to tell her son that it was she who forced me to leave and that I didn't want to but did it for him. At the time, we were in the lobby of a psychiatric hospital, where he had just been admitted for what turned out to be a first bipolar episode. I didn't listen to her and stayed with him for another 6 plus years. In the hindsight of 30 plus years, I wish I had listened to the heartfelt advice that grieving mother was giving me. While she was losing her own child, she was trying to save the future of someone else's child. I managed to have a pretty good outcome but I still have trust issues that have impacted my current marriage.</p><p></p><p>Like your son's girlfriend, I was also an ambitious young woman. The end of my 7 year relationship with that man finally came when I graduated from law school and was able to compete with him professionally. Although he was more experienced than I, being 8 years older, I am a quick learner and advanced quickly and he became jealous and unstable when I got a promotion that put me in an equivalent position to him, although at a different company. He picked a fight from which it was impossible to back down and that was the end. I left and sent friends over to get my belongings.</p><p></p><p>I don't know what will happen to Ache and his girlfriend but you should never feel badly for caring enough about this girl to be honest with her. I held good feelings towards my ex's mom for the rest of her life. In fact, he actually called me when she was dying and I went to see her at the hospital; it was 13 years after that conversation and I was pregnant with my second child.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="svengandhi, post: 679612, member: 3493"] I remember being 18 years and in the throes of first love when my boyfriend's mother sat down with me and begged me to leave right then and there and never look back. She promised to tell her son that it was she who forced me to leave and that I didn't want to but did it for him. At the time, we were in the lobby of a psychiatric hospital, where he had just been admitted for what turned out to be a first bipolar episode. I didn't listen to her and stayed with him for another 6 plus years. In the hindsight of 30 plus years, I wish I had listened to the heartfelt advice that grieving mother was giving me. While she was losing her own child, she was trying to save the future of someone else's child. I managed to have a pretty good outcome but I still have trust issues that have impacted my current marriage. Like your son's girlfriend, I was also an ambitious young woman. The end of my 7 year relationship with that man finally came when I graduated from law school and was able to compete with him professionally. Although he was more experienced than I, being 8 years older, I am a quick learner and advanced quickly and he became jealous and unstable when I got a promotion that put me in an equivalent position to him, although at a different company. He picked a fight from which it was impossible to back down and that was the end. I left and sent friends over to get my belongings. I don't know what will happen to Ache and his girlfriend but you should never feel badly for caring enough about this girl to be honest with her. I held good feelings towards my ex's mom for the rest of her life. In fact, he actually called me when she was dying and I went to see her at the hospital; it was 13 years after that conversation and I was pregnant with my second child. [/QUOTE]
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Feeling like most disloyal mom ever
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