Finally a diagnosis Now What

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Heartsick, Aug 10, 2009.

  1. Heartsick

    Heartsick New Member

    A couple of months ago, finally took difficult child to her pediatrician. He said to take her over to the mental health facility and have her short term committed. I did not. Finally got a neuropsychologist thing done. Got the results...asbergers (spelling). I agree with most of what he said, but why oh why would an almost 11 yr old start randomly peeing on her bedroom floor! He could not answer that question. He said maybe she was so full of anxiety that was her only way to release it. WHAT! I don't know. So now we have the diagnosis, now I have to wait 2 weeks to see her pediatrician, so he can give her medications. Meanwhile HB is going to rip out her carpet and paint her floor. It is nice to know why she has a depressed spirit. Sorry this note is all over the place, I am still in shock.
  2. WSM

    WSM New Member


    I wish I could help, did you have any clue that it would be aspbergers?

    I don't know about the peeing being a symbolic release of anxiety. I'd check out a urinary tract infection first, the non hurting type.
  3. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Hi! Welcome to the crowd! It's spelled Aspergers Syndrome. It's probably one of the best diagnosis' you can get for kids on the Autistic Spectrum. It's been said that Bill Gates of Microsoft fame is an aspie. I don't know how much research there is behind it, but it could be true.

    Most aspie's biggest challenges are socially based. They don't "get it". They may not care or understand when they do something that's socially frowned upon. The aspie's that I've encountered don't know how to handle a variety of emotions and many are extremely anxious.

    I will council you to be cautious regarding certain medications with some kids on the spectrum. Concerta sent my difficult child 1 into some serious anger spins. Drove me nuts!

    Hit the various searches on the web. There are some really great sites out there - I liked "". There are forums on there that allow you to get help with the parents perspective as well as the kids way of seeing things.

    Keep asking questions - this is a great place to get info and to get some frustration out of your system!

  4. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    I AM an Aspie (high functioning). I am also 49 years old and was only diagnosed at 42. AS and High-Functioning Autism (HFA) (High Functioning Autism) run VERY much in families.

    So much so that despite these higher functioning forms of the spectrum being recognized as a kid, my parents recognized me as "another one" and did a pretty good job of raising me.

    My mother and maternal grandfather are Aspies. Interestingly, my late husband was diagnosis with-ADD but was definitely "spectrumish".

    He did not get the unofficial interventions that I got as a given, but had both a very successful military career and went on to become a chef before he died.

    In both cases he needed jobs where there were definite rules.

    I can't speak for the inappropriate urination as I actually trained very early due to not being able to tolerated the sensation of diapers (I predate disposables).

    You might want to read up on Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) (Sensory Integration Disorder) as this very often goes along with AS and can involve everything from clothing textures to feeding difficulties.

    I should have PMs available on my profile. Feel free to send me any questions you might have and I will be happy to try to answer them for you.

    Do be aware that I might not be up to date on the current handling of AS and Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) kids.

    I learned to play normal the hard way and for many years my biggest handicap has been the bipolar disorder that can sometimes accompany AS syndromes.


  5. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I hope you are meaning some doctor other than her pediatrician to dispense medications. Pediatricians are way over their heads with Aspergers. Our pediatrician always wants an update on my aspie, but unless he is between docs will not write prescriptions. Those prescriptions are given if we suddenly have a doctor stop taking insurance, or move or whatever. They are exactly the same as whatever he is on, no changes.

    Check out the urinary tract infection. It may even be painful. Often with my Aspie something would hurt but he could not tell us exactly what hurt. Often he had an overall grumpiness and would rub or tug on whatever hurt but could not look at me and say "Mom my elbow hurts". Part of this is that the pain is so obvious to him that surely we know about it. We are the adults, the ones in charge and of course he doesn't know more than we do. He was 14 before we finally got him to realize he had a migraine at the onset of symptoms. He would suffer and suffer with them until we realized that he had one. He has had them since age 2 but after the toddler years simply could NOT tell us what was wrong. It made it hard to treat with medicines.

    Kids do NOT report urinary tract infections/problems the way adults do. There may be some issue other than infection that is causing pain on urination. She may be holding it in until it gets past her. IF at all possible, work with her to watch the signs she may have to potty and have her go sit on the potty right away. She may have bad pottying habits, which mean you will have to "retrain" her. At home she should take her underwear off, sit down on the potty with a small footstool and have her legs spread wide. Just like in driver's ed wehre your hands go at 10 and 2, her legs should be at 10 and 2. Run some water in the sink, have her put her hand in warm water, even work with her on consciously relaxing her back and abdominal muscles.

    All of these will help her relearn effective bathroom practices. She also must be coached on how to wipe - front to back and then use new paper if she needs to wipe again.

    If she is like one of my little cousins and cannot stand the idea of holding the paper as she wipes with it, get some cheap disposable gloves in the drugstore area of Walmart. She can use the gloves to hold the paper and then throw them in the garbage can. My cousin couldn't stand having "germy" hands to pull up her pants with.

    There is a lot of hope for Asperger's. But there are a lot of challenges to overcome also.

    What medications are you expecting her to be treated with? What problems are the medications supposed to address?
  6. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I suggest reading Tony Attwood's books on Aspergers to help you out.

    Aspies often have a flat affect, but that doesn't mean they are depressed. My son is like that and he's been assessed a lot--he's not depressed. It's just how he presents to the He doesn't "get" appropriate expressions all the time.
  7. graceupongrace

    graceupongrace New Member


    I am sorry for the pain you're feeling right now. A diagnosis is a shock (sort of a jolt of reality), but it also sets the stage for treatment. It's the first step to getting meaningful help.

    I agree with Susiestar, though, that you should look for someone other than a pediatrician to prescribe medications. Ask the neuropsychologist and/or the mental health facility to recommend a pediatric & adolescent psychiatrist. This area of medicine is very complex, and a pediatrician just cannot be as well-versed on all the nuances of the various medications and combinations of medications. Getting the medications right is a tricky process. It involves a lot of trial and error, and it changes over time as the symptoms change, and as your child grows. It gets even more complicated at puberty, when you have to deal with hormonal factors and rapid growth.

    The pediatrician, however, is a fine place to start for the urinary issues, to determine whether there's an organic cause (e.g., a urinary tract infection).

    Sending many hugs your way.