Freaking out a little over difficult child

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by gcvmom, Dec 22, 2010.

  1. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    He had an abdominal xray (KUB) on Monday because of all the GI issues he's been having. I already knew he was constipated because of the stool sample I managed to collect on Friday (and he hasn't had a bm since).

    When we were there, the tech showed us that he was indeed FOS, though not as bad as some he's seen. But the kicker was a strange foreign body that looked like a swirl of wire in his pelvis. It could be in his rectum (this kid has been known to try to take care of constipation on his own by inserting all sorts of implements unbeknownst to his parents), in which case they could remove it via colonoscopy; and it could be in his small bowel, in which case we are looking at surgery. Thus my freaking state of mind.

    He has no recollection of swallowing or inserting anything that remotely resembles said object. I even stressed the serious nature of the situation to see if that might help his "memory," and he STILL says he doesn't remember doing any such thing.

    So I'm schlepping him the 50 miles back up to L.A. on one of the rainiest December weeks in nearly a decade.

    Please pray for light traffic and a non-surgical solution to whatever this is.
  2. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Have a safe ride, hoping it's nothing serious, even though it might hoover to be something as simple as something he had in his pocket or bad developing of the x-rays.
  3. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    We haven't left yet because he's barricaded himself in his room now. :rolleyes:

    We're pretty sure it wasn't anything to do with his clothing (zipper, pockets, etc) because they had him pull his jeans down to his knees. He only had on his underwear and was covered with a sheet.

    He just came out of his room and says he refuses to participate in any more medical tests for the rest of this year. Hoo-boy. This is gonna be a fun day.
  4. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Praying for light traffic, rain stopping till you get safely back home, and that the "object" can be safely and easily removed.

    Hugs for you.
  5. Josie

    Josie Active Member

    Sending good thoughts.

    I hope he was just expressing his frustration with it all and will come back to reality soon.
  6. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Sending hugs and prayers. I hope you have very light traffic and that you have been able to convince him that he needs to go with you.
  7. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Fingers crossed that all works settles down soon. Hugs. DDD
  8. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Fingers crossed and prayers being said. Being FOS is far more painful than many people have any clue about. I can understand how a kid might try to fix this himself, but I hope that he can understand how incredibly dangerous trying to dig it out with any kind of tool can be. when Jess went through this the ONLY thing that remedied it was the milk and molasses enema that she had at the hospital. It was an AWFUL night but better than the previous days had been.

    The enema is an old home remedy that the older docs in our area passed on and it was much easier than some of the other treatments. It was a jar of molasses (12 oz I think) warmed and mixed with that same jar full of warmed whole milk. Then it was administered in several doses until it was used.

    Hopefully you are at the hospital and there was not a serious problem and he will be all cleaned out and sent home tomorrow. Just thought I would post that remedy in case you need to try it with his current problems after you know if it is safe to try it.

    lots of hugs to both of you.
  9. barneysmom

    barneysmom Member

    Hoping everything goes OK, with an uncomplicated solution. Thinking of you guys.

  10. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    I just saw on FB that difficult child 1 got in the car and they are on their way. Fingers crossed and prayers being said that he'll continue to cooperate when they arrive and that the traffic/weather cooperate too.
  11. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    Hope things go smoothly...will send an extra prayer for you!

    give us an update when you can.
  12. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    We are finally home. Thank you everyone for the positive thoughts and prayers!

    He was a REAL stinker tonight. Got out of the car when we parked and followed me to the imaging center, keeping about 4 feet behind me and glowering the whole way. Our 90 minute right to the hospital was silent except for the news radio I had on. :-/

    He refused to put the wristband on at registration, but finally cooperated after I chastised him and the clerk gave him a WTH? look. But as soon as we got to the lobby to wait to be called in, he tore the wristband off. Then he proceeded to rant and vent on me for half an hour until they came for him. The escort gave me a puzzled look when difficult child 1 wouldn't get out of his seat and I explained that he wasn't happy to be there. You'd think I'd be used to this by now, but it's very hard when he gets like this.

    We walked back to the CT room and they had him get on the table, then raised it up so it could slide through the doughnut. They covered him with a sheet and told him to pull his jeans down to his knees, then had me leave the room. It was all over after about 6 or 7 minutes.

    He hit the restroom before we left, and by the time he came out he was clearly coming out of his episode and becoming more communicative. We decided to walk across the street to a shopping center (there used to be a theater there and he wanted to see a movie, but turns out it's closed down), and on the way he apologized for the way things had gone down tonight. He said he was angry and frustrated, and I reminded him that none of this was my fault and it wasn't fair to dump on me just because I was the only convenient person around. He apologized some more and I tried not to let him see the tears in my eyes. Like I asked husband this afternoon, some days I just don't understand why this has to be so. damn. hard.

    I really hope we get the results by the end of the day tomorrow, but it's more likely we won't hear anything until Friday. :(

    MEANWHILE... my father in law convinced husband to take him to A CASINO tonight because mother in law, sister in law#1, sister in law#2, sister in law#3 and nieces #1 & #2 (both over 21) all planned a "girls' night out" at this casino tonight, and father in law didn't want to be stuck at sister in law#1's all by himself tonight. So difficult child 2 and easy child were alone for 3 hours, which I guess is not that bad in the grand scheme of things, but it just doesn't set very well with me that I'm the one left to deal with crap while the rest of the world -- okay, the majority of my inlaws and my husband -- parties. I'm feeling very much like an ant in the midst of a swarm of grasshoppers. Where's a giant chicken when you need one?
  13. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    There's a giant chicken in Marietta, GA. Or at least there used to be.

    It sucks to always be the one taking the responsibility while everyone else gets to play. A little support and help would be nice, wouldn't it? At least holding down the fort instead of going out...

    I hope everything turns out ok with difficult child. I'm truly sorry he's feeling so bad. He must be miserable.
  14. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    So now the GI is asking about his bladder & kidneys! And I'm left wondering if he stuck something up there... I did ask him about it yesterday just to make sure I didn't miss any orafice. I told her he'd never seen a urologist nor had any bladder studies done. Then she wanted to know the best number to reach me today.

    Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. :2dissapointed:
  15. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Sending major hugs your way today. I hope everything resolves quickly and painlessly for all of you.

    Please update us when you can.
  16. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!


    There's some kind of tube in his bladder. So this is self-inflicted. :hammer: And it wasn't there in '07 when he had a CT done.

    Looking back, in '08 and '09 when we were having huge behaviorial issues with him, he was taking LONG baths and I was finding all sorts of implements in the tub and sometimes stool. I just figured he was constipated and being a stupid teenager trying to deal with it on his own. At the time, we had some flexible vinyl Tinkertoy tubes and I'm thinking this might be what's in there!

    I'm finding very little humor in this because they also said his kidneys are somewhat enlarged and they think this object is causing reflux into them. They also think the irritated bladder is likely to blame for the bowel problems he's been having.

    So we have an appointment a week from today with a urologist in their minimally invasive urology center (which sounds like this can probably be resolved with a scope). And maybe, finally, his bowel problems will all be resolved after he gets through this. Wouldn't that be wonderful?

    Trying to figure out the best way to tell difficult child 1 and how much to reveal. He's sleeping right now. Thinking I'll wait until Sunday or Monday.

    Never a dull moment around here. That's for sure! :bloodshot:
  17. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member


    Ummm...Jean, he is 16, I dont want to be indelicate here but we are talking about the male well...favorite toy! At that age they well...LOVE that toy a lot. Is it possible that this wasnt some sort of GI thing but a mistake having to do with playing with his...umm new toy?
  18. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Oh, absolutely I think that's what was going on with THAT end of his anatomy. There may even be more than one of those things in there! And he would have been 13-15 when this was going on. Cuz he's only been taking showers the past year and I have NOT seen any more implements of destruction in the bathroom. :faint:
  19. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    OMG. I also think you're going to have to talk with the psychiatrist. Maybe the psychiatric medications are causing problems in this area as well???
  20. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    OMG is right. This is certainly something he needs to talk over with the psychiatrist. While removing it might resolve his bowel issues, he needs to discuss this with a male who can let him know how serious this can be. Until it is scoped you have no way of knowing how much damage has been caused by this. i imagine that the removal may be very painful as his tissue has likely adhered to it. Could this be a result more of hypersexuality than "normal" experimenting? That is why I am thinking maybe psychiatrist should speak with him.

    People do strange things. I hope that this has not done permanent damage and that he does not continue to do it.

    I am sorry you have to deal with this - it seems like a teen might be more likely to open up with his father instead of you.

    After you have dealt with all this (or before if you have to wait to have this taken care of), you should take a vacation all alone. Let husband handle the kids for a weekend. Go somewhere, even if it is just a hotel nearby. Get a massage, even a spa day if you want. Eat junk food or whatever your favorites are. Do whatever it is that YOU want to do! If husband can take people to the casino, you should be able to take a sanity break and let him deal with the chaois for a while.

    It would be AWESOME if you could do this while your inlaws are there - but only if husband will make sure that they are okay and not at his parents' mercy.

    Lots of hugs to you!