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Parent Emeritus
"Friends"...why is it so hard to get away from them?
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<blockquote data-quote="2much2recover" data-source="post: 638476" data-attributes="member: 18366"><p>No matter the rest of the post I think this part is true. Once you "kicked him out" (let him go) you really, really have to let him go. I, too had alarms going off about this situation but I think the biggest part is the part that you two are too involved with what is going on with difficult child right now. If I were in your situation I would stop, at least for a while, answering the calls (and cries) from the difficult child. You have to learn to put some distance between yourselves and difficult child because, yes, they are extremely capable of manipulation. Having gone back and read your posts about all you have been through with difficult child, maybe you should go back and read them too; see how much difficult child has played and manipulated you in the past. Honestly you both have been through a lot trying to help you difficult child. When is enough, finally enough? I think that was the main point Guide Me was trying to point out. While difficult child is out of the house, you are still caught up in the drama, and (can't blame you) waiting for the next shoe to drop. Stop being ANY kind of resource for you difficult child. Stop trying to fix things for difficult child and let him stand or fall on his own.</p><p>Ironically, once you kicked your difficult child out I was going to post something of how you and your husband (rightfully) should start to live your lives as empty-nesters and put the focus back on the two of you. When we have been caught up in as much stuff as difficult child's bring us, sometimes the quiet that comes when they are gone can become anxiety as we no longer have control over what they are doing/shouldn't be doing. Agree 100% that drama is ruling the days, whoever is or is not to blame. At this point in your lives, if you truly want to move on from the antics of the difficult child - it is time to go radio silent in my humble opinion</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="2much2recover, post: 638476, member: 18366"] No matter the rest of the post I think this part is true. Once you "kicked him out" (let him go) you really, really have to let him go. I, too had alarms going off about this situation but I think the biggest part is the part that you two are too involved with what is going on with difficult child right now. If I were in your situation I would stop, at least for a while, answering the calls (and cries) from the difficult child. You have to learn to put some distance between yourselves and difficult child because, yes, they are extremely capable of manipulation. Having gone back and read your posts about all you have been through with difficult child, maybe you should go back and read them too; see how much difficult child has played and manipulated you in the past. Honestly you both have been through a lot trying to help you difficult child. When is enough, finally enough? I think that was the main point Guide Me was trying to point out. While difficult child is out of the house, you are still caught up in the drama, and (can't blame you) waiting for the next shoe to drop. Stop being ANY kind of resource for you difficult child. Stop trying to fix things for difficult child and let him stand or fall on his own. Ironically, once you kicked your difficult child out I was going to post something of how you and your husband (rightfully) should start to live your lives as empty-nesters and put the focus back on the two of you. When we have been caught up in as much stuff as difficult child's bring us, sometimes the quiet that comes when they are gone can become anxiety as we no longer have control over what they are doing/shouldn't be doing. Agree 100% that drama is ruling the days, whoever is or is not to blame. At this point in your lives, if you truly want to move on from the antics of the difficult child - it is time to go radio silent in my humble opinion [/QUOTE]
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"Friends"...why is it so hard to get away from them?
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