From Compassion: weekend releif

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by compassion, Feb 7, 2009.

  1. compassion

    compassion Member

    YES!!! It is Sat. night and I don't have that terror where difficult child is/ she is not badgering me, etc. Everyone including the dog is much more relaxed.
    We drove to visiting hours. I had gotton a bunch of stuff for her. She left after about 10 minutes. It is a huge adjustment.
    One day at a time, hoping for greater stability.
    I will call her in a bit.
    I am finally starting to unwind. husband and I had a great Thai meal. Compassion
  2. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    I am so glad you will be able to get some down time tonight!!! You sound like you are in much better spirits.

    My daughter is the same way. No matter where she is, the hospital or the Residential Treatment Center (RTC), we would get her a bunch of stuff, drive hours to visit her and she would kick us our after just a few minutes!!! She was too into what was going on around her to actually spend time with us. She was always afraid she would miss something!!! lol

    Anyway, I am delighted to hear that you are having a peaceful night. Enjoy!

    Shawna :)
  3. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Do not go overboard with the need to provide stuff...I did that out of guilt...and learned pretty quickly that it was just another way to allow my difficult child to manipulate.
  4. bran155

    bran155 Guest

    Good point EW!!! I did that too, many, many times. In fact, my daughter's therapist at her last Residential Treatment Center (RTC) finally had had enough. She actually forbid me to bring my daughter anything but lunch when I came to visit.

    I know it is hard. You are feeling badly for your poor baby girl, but EW is absolutely right!!! :)
  5. ML

    ML Guest

    Enjoy your evening! Hugs, ML
  6. maril

    maril New Member

    Glad to hear your day was okay and your daughter is adjusting. Enjoy your quiet evening with your husband! That is what I am doing right now. My difficult child is out with one of his buddies now, but this is a "safe" friend. difficult child is trying hard to deal with his problems lately but husband and I know better than too get too comfortable here -- never sure what tomorrow will bring with our boy.

    Good luck to you.
  7. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    I am so glad to hear that life is more peaceful for you this weekend. It really is a comforting feeling on those nights that you can go to bed when you want knowing your daughter is safe.

    I am also a giver of stuff to my kids. When difficult child was in the psychiatric hospital, there wasn't much I could give to him directly so I purchased flat Lego bases to donate to the ward he was on. I had noticed they had a lot of Legos and figured bases would be a good addition. So, maybe there is a way you can support your daughter by providing a donation to the facility (a game, DVD, ect.). She doesn't have to know it came from you unless you want her to and you will feel like you are involved in something - even if it is recreational.

    I don't think I told difficult child that I was the one to give the bases. I didn't want the other kids to expect things through him or for him to try to take ownership of the items.
  8. Alttlgabby

    Alttlgabby New Member

    Wonderful to hear that things are easier on you tonight! Just don't feel guilty and know that your child is getting the help they so desperately needs! been there done that, and my daughter tried to make me feel guilty. I don't, not one iota because she is soooo much better, and that is what counts! Peace to you and yours!
  9. Janna

    Janna New Member

    That's wonderful, Compassion. I am *so* glad you're getting a break. You sound great :)