This will be an extra-special Thanksgiving because all my kids, grandkids, and daughters-in-law will be with us for the first time in three years! My oldest son and his wife haven't been here since they were stationed in Europe (are back in the states now). Also, they've invited two of their friends from Italy to our dinner, since they've never been to the US and wanted to see what Thanksgiving is all about. So I'm happy for all the company, and will have plenty of help cooking, etc. However, there's a little cloud of doubt following me around named "difficult child" (the younger). He has a history of turning happy occasions into arguments, fistfights, and the like. Or he disappears either to his bedroom or out of the house. He hates big crowds of people, even (especially?) his own family, and seems to get physically uncomfortable at these gatherings. Not always, but mostly. I've already talked to him a couple of times about not being a jerk and ruining my holiday. He said he won't act up around the guests (seemed surprised that I would even mention it). Then he said that I need to talk to his brothers and sister because they're the ones that "talk smack" to him and then he retaliates by getting crude, vulgar, and insulting, then they lash back, and so on. By "talking smack," he means that his siblings may say something snarky like "Hey, have you got arrested lately? How was your evening in jail?" or something to make fun of him. Of course, he can't take this as any type of teasing, but has to follow it to the nth degree of stupidity. And I think the easy child siblings sometimes are mean to him just because they want to see him squirm a little. So my question is, how do I enforce boundaries with him and my other "kids"? I jokingly told my husband that if anyone starts a big argument or fight, we'll just leave and go to a restaurant for dinner. Obviously, I don't want a scene or to call the police, especially when we have outside guests. I'm going to talk to everyone involved to establish some boundaries. I told difficult child the Younger that even if someone says something to him, he could just go to his room, where he'll likely want to go anyway after he has food on his plate. I'm hoping for the best and that he can keep his word to me, but want to be mentally prepared in case things get out of hand. difficult child has the capacity to be fun, entertaining, and charming, but I never know which one of him is going to show up. I don't like to think too much about this because I don't want this worry to ruin the fun of looking forward to the holiday. I think I'm explaining too much here because you guys already know what I'm talking about. A coping strategy in my back pocket might make me feel better, at least. Any ideas about things you've found effective? Should I just stop worrying and hope for the best?