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Substance Abuse
Girlfriends past drug use.
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<blockquote data-quote="DavidEssex" data-source="post: 627484" data-attributes="member: 18049"><p>Hi Kathy, thank you for your honesty!</p><p></p><p>Yes the drugs are a thing on the past, but I can't explain how horrible it is for me to picture her doing it. If it was something she regretted or felt shame over, it would be a VERY different story. I'd never hold it against her, ever! But where she doesn't regret it and just thinks of it as "one of those things" it's troubling to me.</p><p></p><p>Probably should have mentioned this: the entire issue got stirred up massively about six months ago when one of her "friends" and her boyfriend offered her cocaine inside a house on a Sunday afternoon. She told me right away, but again, it bothered me that she truly wasn't bothered or offended by this. It bothers me that these people are her friends! I don't want this negative influence in her life and effecting our relationship. So it's not totally in the past, as events happen all the time which make it topical, again, if her mindset was different it wouldn't be an issue either. But knowing she sees no problem with it is painful. </p><p></p><p>RE the snooping, this is something I have said I don't regret. I admit, it's not ideal. But for over a year I've been having a horrible feeling that I was being lied to - checking her Emails gave me the answer - that I was. I really feel the means justifies the ends on that one.</p><p></p><p>And whilst I understand a lot of people experiment, in my experience people who experiment in her environments are not good people. I sat down with her and was able to name - from experience - cheats, racists, promiscuous people, etc. And whilst they may exist in all walks of life: it's not a coincidence they are so easily identified in that culture. I think anybody would be hard pressed to suggest anybody supplying her with heavy drugs / using with her, were looking out for her best interests.</p><p></p><p>I just feel with the length of use, manner and quantity, this was more than experimenting. I feel this is something that really needs addressing, however she finds it impossible to talk with me about it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DavidEssex, post: 627484, member: 18049"] Hi Kathy, thank you for your honesty! Yes the drugs are a thing on the past, but I can't explain how horrible it is for me to picture her doing it. If it was something she regretted or felt shame over, it would be a VERY different story. I'd never hold it against her, ever! But where she doesn't regret it and just thinks of it as "one of those things" it's troubling to me. Probably should have mentioned this: the entire issue got stirred up massively about six months ago when one of her "friends" and her boyfriend offered her cocaine inside a house on a Sunday afternoon. She told me right away, but again, it bothered me that she truly wasn't bothered or offended by this. It bothers me that these people are her friends! I don't want this negative influence in her life and effecting our relationship. So it's not totally in the past, as events happen all the time which make it topical, again, if her mindset was different it wouldn't be an issue either. But knowing she sees no problem with it is painful. RE the snooping, this is something I have said I don't regret. I admit, it's not ideal. But for over a year I've been having a horrible feeling that I was being lied to - checking her Emails gave me the answer - that I was. I really feel the means justifies the ends on that one. And whilst I understand a lot of people experiment, in my experience people who experiment in her environments are not good people. I sat down with her and was able to name - from experience - cheats, racists, promiscuous people, etc. And whilst they may exist in all walks of life: it's not a coincidence they are so easily identified in that culture. I think anybody would be hard pressed to suggest anybody supplying her with heavy drugs / using with her, were looking out for her best interests. I just feel with the length of use, manner and quantity, this was more than experimenting. I feel this is something that really needs addressing, however she finds it impossible to talk with me about it. [/QUOTE]
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