G'day folks.
Sharon/WO, go carefully with the exercise, don't make the damage worse. Different specialists hae different guidelines. My GP says to not exercise my torn muscles; my neurologist says to keep moving. The chiropractor says to rest it. The neuro says if I rest it, then my muscles will get floppy and be more inclined to tear again. So instead of getting confused listening to all the doctors, I listen to my body and move gently.
Today was busy but efficient with it. We didn't have to leave home until midday. easy child 2/difficult child 2 had an earlier appointment with her gastroenterologist (who was also mine, he asked after me, she says). Then I had to collect her to take her and difficult child 3 to the pediatrician. We had a lot to do, lots of paperwork to hand the guy. Only I left my big envelope at home, I'll have to drop it in, probably toomorrow. I did remember to bring easy child 2/difficult child 2's birth certiicate with me - she needed it for her welfare application.
So we got to the doctor and there was a full waiting room. "How long do we have?" I asked. "We have a couple of errands to run."
The receptionist gave us half an hour, so we went over the road to the welfare office with the birth certificate. It was the final piece of paper they needed, they said her welfare payment should be in her account by tomorrow or the day after, which should mean she can afford the rent this week and maybe next week.
We got back to the doctor with time to spare, saw him and got out again in about 45 minutes. The next appointment for easy child 2/difficult child 2 was with the disability agency that difficult child 1 is registered with. The director is an old friend of ours, her daughters used to be in the same dance school as our girls, plus her younger daughter was with the same talent agency. So we spent a lot of time together at dance concerts, ferrying kids to and fro to exams, doing hair and make-up. It's good to have someone on the job who knows our kids.
We were half an hour there, an appointment has been made for easy child 2/difficult child 2 for a few days' time, to be assessed for her capaiblity to work. After that, the agency will be looking for work for her, in her chosen field. It will take over what has been my job, what should be HER job - actively looking for work. But she really has a problem making the first approach, her anxiety is the problem. She needs her hand held, metaphorically, in any difficult situation with people she doesn't know. People have been critical of me for continuing to be involved, they say she won't learn to fend for herself, she is a married woman now and has to learn to do things for herself. But I know from past experience, if I leave her to do thigns herself, she won't do them when she should, then she wails about how unfair life is. She still needs some help, but less and less. So I'm at the point of tellnig other people to take a hike and let me continue to parent my adult difficult child as I see fit. Because a little help now means I can stop helping sooner. But no help now, she will continue to do nothing for herself and will need a lot more help in later years.
As we were leaving the agency I noticed that schools were getting out. Three pm. I had shopping to do, difficult child 3 had his 5 pm drama class, we had limited time to get a lot accomplished. easy child 2/difficult child 2 was whining a bit about anting to get back home to spend time with her husband on his day off but I drove right into the mall car park. She could have walked home from there but chose to stick around. I'd asked her to bring some copies of her resume, so we began to pound the beat and look for holiday jobs. I madde her go in by herself but I walked her to the doors. We discussed which shops she would be prepared to work in. Unfortunately, most stores have already done their holiday hiring, had done it before she had lost her job so she's out of luck there. The larger stores might still hire her, she needs to apply on line though. She's afraid that if she takes a job in a shop then she won't keep looking for child care work (which is what she really wants). But she has to get a job fast, because welfare won't pay enough to cover her rent for more than a few weeks.
So we walked around, most stores were either not interested or said to apply online. I know she won't do that unless I'm sitting next to her. Two stores took a resue, one especially was interested - they sell dance wear and asked what experience she had with performing and with children! She has the credentials for both.
We were walking back to the grocery store and easy child 2/difficult child 2 was saying, "I've missed out, there aren't any jobs left," when we passed a store which had a sign outside - "Manager wanted, cashier wanted, experience essential, apply within."
She was in like a shot, explained about her experience as cashier ahd supervisor, said that she had just been made redundant and needed work. They toook her last resume.
I checked my watch - I had half an hour left to do all my grocery and vegetable shopping, drop easy child 2/difficult child 2 back home and head to difficult child 3's drama class. easy child 2/difficult child 2 still won't go into the vegetable store where she used to work so I gave her my grocery list, got her vegetable list and we split up. I was through in less than six minutes, met up with her and we took another five minutes. She grabbed my keys and headed back to the car to load up while I swung past the bakery for husband's bread. I rang difficult child 3's phone, said, "Meet us back at the car, ASAP," and just as easy child 2/difficult child 2 & I finished loading the car, difficult child 3 hurtled out the door of the mall. I was starting the car as the kids buckled up, we were out of the car park with 15 minutes to get to the drama class. We dropped easy child 2/difficult child 2 off at her place and kept rolling. Got a dream run to drama, got there with five minutes to spare. I dropped difficult child 3 off at the door and kept going to the butcher to collect my order. mother in law had also rung throuh an order for suet (for the Christmas pudding she makes every year) and the butcher threw that in as well.
I got back to drama class by ten past 5, had the chance to sit and chat to the other mothers for a while.
After drama we always get dinner for difficult child 3, then we headed home. And hit the ground running - chores to do, food to cook (for husband's dinner, plus other food for tomorrow). Shopping to put away.
Tomorrow I need to see the chiropractor again and I hate to make one trip for just one thing, so I'm taking mother in law with me (and maybe easy child 2/difficult child 2) to the wholesale fruit & nut business to stock up for the Christmas cake and Christmas pudding. mother in law always loads up on nibbles for the holidays too. And they always throw in a handful of their wrapped chocolates for this place.
Tomorrow I'm also taking a copy of the local paper and hopefully I'll be able to sit with easy child 2/difficult child 2 and get her to apply for some of these child care jobs. She's also got to finish working on her backpay spreadsheet. I'll collect her washing from her and get her to come out on Thursday to collect it, I'll work with her then too on these things.
She needs to see just how much we got done today and how well we can use time when we organise things. When we get a lot done like this, it reduces the stress levels because you can ease back and rest briefly, knowing that things are keeping on going once you've started them off.
Thankfully the weather has remained cool for yesterday and today, the next couple of days will be a bit warmer but not too bad. It's the best weather to do what we're doing. The weekend is going to be busy for me, I want to enjoy it knowing I've helped easy child 2/difficult child 2 to prepare as much as possible for this backpay claim.
As I type this I'm watching "The Castle" on TV. It's been voted perhaps the best Aussie movie ever. It has certainly given us some very memorable lines which are now part of Aussie culture!
Enjoy your Tuesday, everyone.
Marg
Gee what a surprise. It still shows signs of maturity and understanding of what he needs in a relationship. I'm not too upset. difficult child is a good man and shouldn't be made to feel like an outcast because he doesn't want to live in girlfriend's world of religion. We will see but I don't see girlfriend or parents loosening the death grip they put on their practice of faith. Sigh. Religion and politics are like the death shroud to tolerance aren't they?
