Got a new diagnosis of Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by HMBgal, Feb 19, 2016.

  1. HMBgal

    HMBgal Active Member

    Well, things have been pretty hard around here the last few months with the grandson. Had him on just guanfacine (generic Intuniv) and no stimulants. When we got to the doctor today, a new one, she added this diagnosis to the ADHD and Anxiety disorder. Poor kid. It sure does sound like him, though, I must say. And she added Abilify, 2.5 mg before bed. She saw the look of shock on my face when she mentioned risperdal (think that's what it's called) because some of students are on that and it's scared me pretty bad. But after reading the side possible effects of this whole class of drugs, it's ripping my heart out. And yet he's not doing well and we can't really take much more of the melt-downs, property damage, and physical injury. He's also talking about sexual stuff that he's heard around the playground, but he doesn't have the social filter/skill to not use the words to girls...yeah, got suspended for that one. His father, that he's supposed to see three weekends a month, is convinced he's a sexually volatile predator and won't let him in his home until he's "sedated," to use his exact words. The kid is nine.

    He's so cranky, hair-trigger temper, socially struggling, the works. He's got an IEP finally for emotional disturbance as his primary qualification, and ADHD (Other health impaired) as a secondary. He has a one-to one aide in the classroom, although she keeps her distance, a counselor coming to the school weekly for a 45 minute session, a wonderful teacher, and a pretty decent principal in a small school (350 kids or so). I just don't know what else we can do.

    I guess I'm just venting and if anyone has any thoughts to share about the DMDD thing and the drug, I would love to hear from you. I'm envisioning in my head this kid that can't stop eating (his father is obese, but grandson isn't), has permanent muscle disorders, and won't be helped by this drug. I'm so sad. I want to be hopeful.
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Risperidone is scary. We have been there, and it was the only medication that made a significant difference at the time (early teens). It does affect appetite. For us, it was less of a problem because he was also on methylphenidate-family medications, which suppress appetite - so he could stand to eat more than he was - plus he went on the risperidone just as he was hitting that teen-aged major growth spurt which meant that his weight gain went into every possible direction, rather than just "fat". He was a little bit over ideal, but not majorly.

    If he does need to go on this medication, keep lots of high-food-value/high-fiber, lower-calorie foods around, prepped and ready to eat. Fruit, veggies, low-fat yogurt, cooked cereals for breakfast... things that "fill you up" fast. Expect major hunger at least six times a day.
    • Informative Informative x 2
    • List
  3. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Well-Known Member

    HMBgal, I moved this post you wrote to your own thread, because I had something to say to you about it. My son is a serious gamer. I agree that it is as addicting as ingestible substances. I think, however, that you can use the gaming to your advantage. He can be rewarded with limited gaming for good behavior. I am wondering if the sexual language comes more from the gaming than talk on the playground. You can always discuss the appropriateness of the games with Gamestop employees. They can steer you to the games that are better for nine year olds.

    Also, since I am a one-on-one aide myself, it worried me that you said your grandson's aide "keeps her distance." Seriously, how is that helping him? It sounds like she is in the best possible position to help him learn appropriate social skills and anger management. I help the kid with whom I work with those very things every minute of the day.

    I love your smiling goat. :biggrin:
  4. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    My teen daughter recently diagnosed with DMDD... In the past, they had hinted of bipolar symptoms, or possible histrionic personality disorder. Which they said is still a possibility as she gets older... Her birth mother also diagnosed bipolar... But I am wondering if both are alcohol effected prenatally, and that is just how their brains work... They both act about 12... My granddaughter that we are raising will soon be 18 and her mom will be 48. There are so many similarities...

    I don't know about the medications... We have tried several...we had a recent medication check, and since she isn't taking anything regularly, the nurse suggested just having hydroxyzine PRN when she is agitated...

  5. HMBgal

    HMBgal Active Member

    Morning all. Rough night with the boy (wanted to read all night, said he was having a hard time breathing) so we're both very tired.

    Pigless in VA, I work in Special Education, as well, as I think the idea was to find the balance between hovering and being a barrier to naturalistic communication between his peers, getting into a learned helplessness scenario, etc. They wanted the aide to be a "classroom helper" and support for the teacher and the first line when he needs to be invited to leave the classroom, move in close when he's getting frustrated with his in-school assignments (he has zero tolerance for frustration, so he'll stab his pencil into the desk, rip up the assignment, and generally cause disruption). He is already so stigmatized at that school and has to endure quite a lot of comments from other children, under their breath of course, but he can always hear. Kids can be awfully mean. The aide makes suggestions about going to a quieter place where he can stand up to do his work (which he quite likes), or a time away until he calms. As far as being on the playground, he has limited access to that. He does alternative recess by helping his old teacher help the first graders to read, at which he excels and really enjoys. There are times when I do think some of the incidents at school could have been avoided had there been closer supervision. It's a work in progress for sure, but we really like her, she has a wonderful heart, and she likes our boy.

    As for the sexual language, no doubt he learned much of it on the gaming sites, which is why we shut him down. He can do offline gaming things like Minecraft and such. Anytime he expresses an interest in a game, I go right onto common sense media and get reviews. But when he is on the internet, unless I'm standing right next to him, he will sneak off to where he isn't supposed to go. And he is VERY sneaky.
  6. pigless in VA

    pigless in VA Well-Known Member


    That sounds like a much better situation for your grandson than what I envisioned. Interestingly, all those behaviors that your son exhibits, the child I work with also does. I, too, take him to the hallway for inappropriate behaviors. Last week, I even dragged him in the chair all the way to the hall, since he refused to go there willingly. I think he rather enjoyed the "ride" out.:rolleyes:

    The other kids are probably somewhat fearful of your grandson. Just yesterday one of the other kids told me that Jack's behavior of making ugly faces and hitting himself was scaring him. He likes Jack, but is an anxious child. Watching Jack get truly frustrated and angry is intimidating. It's really hard to balance the needs of everyone in a classroom situation. Jack is also a terrific reader, and we get him to read out loud often. What a great idea to get your grandson to read to the younger kids! We do also allow Jack to stand to do his work as much as we can. I've noticed that he is much more focused after he spends time at P.E.

    School is so hard for boys. They are expected to sit still and pay attention for what must seem to them to be a torturous length of time. Ideally, it would be wonderful to take them outside to run around once every hour. I think a lot of their frustration would be burnt off if they had more access to physical activity. I've been known to get boys to jump up and down 20 times to redirect that energy.

    Yes, we've had incidents which occurred when the adults in the room were distracted. Kids can be sneaky and choose to do things they know are "wrong" when no one is looking. We have one boy who lept onto his friends' backs in the lunch line. :why:
  7. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I worked on the bus at head start. The kids learned the sex talk at home then passed it on to the other kids. This is what they saw and heard at home, some of it scary. Had little to do with videgames. Our oldest bus kids were four.
    we were not allowed to stop any kid from saying anything, no matter how graphic or sick. They learN a lot of this from kids who are exposed to this language from their own fI lies and the other kids copy it.
    • Informative Informative x 1
    • List
  8. HMBgal

    HMBgal Active Member

    Well, as far as where they pick up this language, I know that "I want to touch your vagina and I want you to..." um, well, I can't think of a way to put it that won't get bleeped--it didn't come from my house, nor my daughter's house, and while his father has quite a foul mouth, I can't imagine him saying it because his new wife (two years now) is straight-laced in the extreme. Although she has dropped the f-bomb on my daughter in emails. But she wouldn't say those those things, I know it.

    These gaming sites have people narrating them, often with their girlfriends, and I've heard some stuff that curled my hair, and I'm no prude. It's not the games themselves, it's the gamers narrating as they play. And it's hugely popular and there a few extremely foul-mouthed young people that are widely watched and followed on YouTube. And some of the comments that I saw people say to my son in the comments box of his silly little YouTube videos was so shocking. He's so much better off not being on the internet at all at this point, except for school. Those sites are monitored and filtered. He's the unofficial IT guy and fixes all the computers for the kids and teachers when they freeze, etc.

    He's reading tons of books now and some of characters are so great and I love the conversations we are having about it. And he is more interested in getting out of the house and riding his bike. Unfortunately, he really has no playdates or friends. He has kids that he calls friends at school, but they aren't really. And he doesn't understand, and it breaks my heart.

    As for not being allowed to stop dirty talk, well, it got my grandson suspended for 2 days. He was removed posthaste and stopped dead in his tracks by the teacher and principal. They called it sexual harassment on his suspension papers. And you aren't supposed to be allowed to suspend for things that are part and parcel of their disability. Pfffft. But I feel terrible for the little girl to whom he said those things. And I can't even imagine what the parents of that girl must be thinking and feeling. Well, actually I think I can.

    The abilify is kicking grandson's behind. He's been sleeping so much today, although we got him out into the ocean in his new wetsuit and he boogie boarded for an hour or so. Then crashed hard.
  9. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    The kids talk that way as early as age three. Not all kids but the ones who hear too much at home and see too much. And the other kids hear it from them and pretty soon they are all saying it. Somehow they figure out that its not nice so, like most kids so young,bthey pick it up and giggle about it together. Ive heard some kids on the bus say loudly "my uncle touches my (fill in the blanks) and "shut up, you (insert worst filthiest word).
    Parents are worse than videogamed. I never heard that on a videogame. Ages ago, when I went to school,bi didnt know the "f" word until I was maybe 11. But my times change. My oldest son came to me in kingergarten, before the age of videogames, to ask me what "f" meant.
    I was shocked. We never used that word in our house. He told me the kids were saying it and laughing. Yikes!
    Things have gotten worse, maybe not in our homes, but in many homes and our kids are exposed to their words about sexvand more at early ages.
    I was totally shocked by what those 3-4 year old babies said loudly and often on this bus. It was in a very middle class area too. Kids pass along what they hear. Some kids see things at home that resemble X rated movies and they tell other kids. Sadly, today it is lots of cussing and details about sex. I heard it. Made me glad my kids are grown up now.
  10. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    I worked several months in an early education program and about half the students (age 3 to 5) had special needs. I gave my notice after one boy would put his hands down my blouse and laugh, try to pull little girls pants down, bite other students, spit on people and run away from us, in the classroom and on the playground. We were told we could not restrain him, nor pick him up and carry him. We even had a a padded closet for him to "calm down" in. I had to hold one of those gym floor pads in front of me to protect myself from him trying to scratch, kick and bite my ankles. Or he would push and shove the pad I was holding. I quit before I did something stupid that I might get In trouble for. Once he did get my elbow in his face, as he snuck up behind me and tried to bite the back of my upper arm. It was a reflex from pain and connected with his nose. I gave my notice that least I had witnesses that it wasn't anything more than a protective reflex, but when I felt an odd satisfaction, I knew I needed to leave that job.

    I don't have the temperament to be anyone's punching bag... Even if they are 5. KSM
  11. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Thats another thing I found they learned in pre school and staff was not allowed to discipline for anything. We couldnt tell their parents either "because you never know if a kid will get a beating if they know." It was insane.
    One little girl bit her aid all over and nothing was ever done until she was removed to go to a behavioral class, which took months. She bit the other kids too. Cant discipline for her problems. Could not isolate from peers. Could only talk to her gently about how what she did was "not ok." You could not be negative to any child and the word"no" was forbidden.
    I think I know why young kids learn bad things. From each other coupled with lack of ability to discipline them. Scary world for little ones these days. And in my opinion videgames are low on the rung of why. Bet parents used to blame television for all bad behavior when it was a new thing too. Speaking of which, many small kids gave us graphic details of sexual movies they saw daddy or mommy or uncle george or the babysitter watch in front of them.
    Kids and parents are different now and oftrn the kids see or experience too much. And they tell their peers about it.
  12. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    The medications are scary. However, for my son we had to try because he was so violent there was no other choice. Risperdil he was only on for a few days in the hospital one time because it made him way too tired. Abilify caused him to have Tardive Dyskensia.

    Eventually we tried Cloazpine. He had to have blood draws weekly because of possible side effects with blood cells. Then after 1 1/2 years he only has to have his blood draws once a month.

    For him it has made all the difference in the world.

    Sending gentle hugs your way-I know things are not easy.
  13. MDavis

    MDavis New Member

    Hello KSM,

    I wanted to say that I feel your insight and personal experience with having a child with a diagnosis is very much appreciated. I am currently a graduate student at Lewis and Clark College studying Marriage, Couple, and Family Therapy with a strong advocacy for youth. I am currently studying "diagnosis with integrity" . A particular diagnosis that has caught my attention that is very new to the mental health field is DMDD. I was curious how you and your daughter feel about the diagnosis and has it been helpful for ya'll. If you feel comfortable, I would love to hear more about your experience. I have hesitancy with the diagnosis from working with youth.
    If you have any questions you would like to ask me please feel free to do so. I really hope I have the opportunity to hear your story.

    Thank you for your time and best wishes,
  14. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    MDavis...I sent you a private message. I think at the top you will see an inbox to click on.

    As to the diagnosis...I think it might be helpful, instead of jumping to the bipolar diagnosis. I hate to label her with something that could limit her choices of occupations. She was already told that she wasn't able to consider military service at this time, as she was taking a medication for mood and depression.

    I think she has a great fear of "turning out like mom". We are trying DBT classes, but now that she turned 18, she cancelled her appointment.

  15. Roxona

    Roxona Active Member

    I'm reading along, HMB. The things you are going through with your grandson sound so scary. You are such a wonderful grandma to be there for him and helping him through this. He is so lucky to have you in his life!

    I agree that you have to watch the videogames, but you also have to watch the kids he associates with as well. Shortly after I became a fixture in SS10's life, I found graphic, hard core porn on his iPad. He told me the neighbor boy had shown him how to get on the website. The boys were just 7 years old at the time.

    And, yes, they are so smart and sneaky, aren't they. My husband put special viewing guidelines on the boys Netflix account. Within a day, SS10 had figured out how to create a new account, so he could view what he wanted....that's when the passwords were put into place.

    It's like playing chess...gotta stay five moves ahead of 'em.:future:
  16. I wanted to chime in about the Risperdal. Our Difficult Child was diagnosed with bipolar when he was 11, but really he had some version of it or disruptive mood disorder from birth. He was always hyperactive, no boundaries, poor impulse control, frequently agitated, violent, "stuck" on something, inappropriate sexual remarks and touching from a very young age. He's on a 3-medication cocktail, one is lithium, one was Risperidone and I don't remember the third right now. He needs all three to function. It has made a huge difference in how he handles things. Night and day. He's almost like a typical kid now except a bit quirky. He has gained a lot of weight, though. Last year is p-doctor decided to switch the Risperidone to Geodon because it's not supposed to cause weight gain like the other antipsychotics do. It was a disaster. It didn't control his mood at all and he had several manic episodes and his behavior was much like it was before he started the new medications. Then the p-doctor switched the Geodon to Zyprexa. It took a couple of months to get him stabilized, but it's been pretty effective for him.

    However, he is still gaining weight. So last week, the p-doctor decided to try Geodon again. Why?!?!?! Wasn't last year bad enough? Didn't he consult his case notes? All weekend Difficult Child was a mess - agitated, angry, yelling. As of yesterday, back on the Zyprexa, so he's starting to calm down again. All the atypical antipsychotics have unwanted side effects. However, for us, letting him have a somewhat normal life while being overweight is the best we can hope for. If he wasn't taking those medications, he'd be a normal weight, but he'd be in jail or an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for or maybe even dead. It was hard enough when he was 8 and assaulting people, constantly running away from home, but now he's 15, five foot ten and 180 pounds. The police won't give him second chances anymore.
  17. HMBgal

    HMBgal Active Member

    Oh boy, STA, you've got your hands full. Dear grandson is still sleepy, starving all the time, but he was so underweight from the years of stimulants since he was five that he needed the weight gain and some growth. Every one except his father thinks that he's doing better. The doctor wants to double the dose from 2.5 mg to 5 mg, but his butt is being so kicked by this dosage and he is better, so we're holding back for now.

    I do really dread puberty, and I'm so afraid of getting police involved. We had an 18 year old girl with well-known mental health issues shot and killed in my little town last year when the family called for help. The sheriff's office, who was very acquainted with her, sent out a brand new person, two days on the job, and this poor girl was dead with 18 seconds of him rolling up on the scene. She was holding an electric drill motor, not plugged in, standing in her driveway, all 5 feet tall of her, and under 100 pounds. One of our very own members here lost her son the same way. I'm scared to death of the police. The father calls the police all the time, which is one reason dear grandson refuses to go over to his father's house anymore. We have never felt the need yet, but if he's putting his sister or us at real physical risk, I guess we'll do what we have to do. We're already trying to come up with a plan because he's gone from 50 pounds in July to 85 pounds now. And boy he's strong, especially in the middle of a temper flare.

    Today, on my job, I got socked hard in the face by a six year old boy, knocked to the ground, nose bloodied, and contact lens knocked out of my eye. And absolutely no consequences for the boy because it's a function of his disability. He has hurt every single person in his classroom and caused untold property damage (in addition of hitting me, he broke $75 dollars worth of my equipment that I brought for him and his classmates to use for their adapted PE class). I'm too old for this....feces. These kids are making me so tired. I need a vacation! Things will be better tomorrow.

    My grandson is on his first field trip without a family member, and that's amazing for us. We've been worried all day, but no phone calls yet. If he pulls this off, what a victory for him and for us, so that's one thing to feel very hopeful about. Up until now, he's had to have one or two of us on every field trip or he wouldn't be allowed to go.

    Hugs to all feeling the struggle. Thanks for you shares, commiseration, and understanding.
  18. Malika

    Malika Well-Known Member

    Hello HMBgal. I suddenly thought of this website tonight, after a long absence, and thought I'd take a look. I am sorry to hear that your grandson is not doing so well. I have never heard of DMDD - can you explain what it is, or is said to be? How did the field trip go? The video games/internet sounds like a minefield. That is one thing I have managed to keep my son away from - he very rarely uses the computer. He does watch these violent films full of fighting though - and then acts it all out afterwards. If I had my way he wouldn't watch them (Wolverine, X men, Avengers and the like) but that was a battle I lost long ago. These children are so open to influence. Has anybody talked about Strattera for your grandson? This is often prescribed for ADHD along with anxiety. My son has been taking it on and off for the past two years or so - he is anxious but takes it basically because it is the only ADHD medication that seems to have any beneficial effect. Its effect is subtle but definitely seems to make him less confrontational and unpleasant. Your grandson's lack of friends is worrying and sad. What can be done about this? Does he play a sport or have an activity like skateboarding or BMXing that can be encouraged? I am not sure how effective school is as a place to socialise - in some ways I think outside interests are a better place to make friends.
  19. HMBgal

    HMBgal Active Member

    Hi Malika! I have thought of you often and wondered how J is getting on. It's nice to see you back here and it sounds your young man is making good progress. Yes, we tried Strattera and it wasn't helping much, and the stimulants are a no-go because it made his anxiety so much worse. The Abilify has actually been the one thing (along with the Intuniv) that has helped for now. We always reserve judgment and say "for now" because things have worked okay in the past, and then the benefit seems to fade away and we start having more bad days than good again. We have always felt that there was a something else that ADHD didn't quite cover. The Anxiety Disorder piece was helpful, then the DMDD has been a good fit for the most part, as well. It just went into the DSM in 2013 and is considered by some to be a controversial diagnoses. If you Google it, you'll see lots of information about it.

    We all went through the hell of indecision and worry about putting him on this class of drugs, but aside from the sleepiness, he has had far more good days than bad. He's still on half the dose the doctor suggests. The explosions aren't as explosive, he seems to be able to stop himself more often before he flies off the handle. His lessened anxiety means he is willing to ride his bike to the park, go off exploring on his own a little on our outings at the zoo or wherever. This is huge for us. He does run into problems with kids sometimes, but he's learned to come home and talk about it. He still does better with younger kids because even though he's wicked smart--reads at high school level, etc., he's socially younger.

    The field trip went really well; he is so proud that he can manage this on his own. He went on another one today and his teacher reported that he had a wonderful day. This teacher is a godsend, and she and her parents, who both volunteer in her classroom, are local to our smallish town. He has seemed to make a friend that doesn't go to his school. This young man seems a little off, I suspect what they used to call Aspergers, but in an okay, if somewhat exasperating way, and I feel like we can trust him not to be mean to grandson.

    If you have any trouble finding information about DMDD, let me know and I'll do up a list of links. Take care and nice to "see" you again!
  20. Malika

    Malika Well-Known Member

    Thanks - of course, I should have looked it up on good old google first :) I see that the key is chronic irritability and anger between the outbursts; in the description I read, it said the diagnosis was given to children who had previously been (mistakenly) diagnosed with bipolar disorder? It is so hard, isn't it - and hard to know whether the medications are or have been causing some of this irritability. But if the current medications seem to be working better than not, well... you have to go with it, I guess. I do understand, of course, how hard these decisions around medications are. Strattera seems to help J on the whole but he gets itchy red spots, occasional nausea and his appetite is suppressed (though not as badly as with some of the stimulants). Sometimes one just does long to take them off these things altogether - I did do that last summer for a couple of months, during which I saw that Strattera really does help his concentration and his mood. I'm sorry it didn't work out for your grandson - it takes ages after you start to get a beneficial effect but I'm sure you know that.

    It is not quite as simple as J is "making good progress", I'm afraid. I'll give a few details - not to make this about us but in the aim of saying that your grandson is really not alone. It is a mixed picture. He has been home-schooled since September - I will not describe the incredible (mis)adventures we have had with school since he left the village school in France at the age of six!! Anyway, it's not permanent because 1) I cannot continue with the daily Struggle with a capital S to do any formal schooling and 2) he needs structure and routine. Unlike your grandson, he has huge problems with reading and writing (severe dyslexia) and I have found an online reading programme that we have been doing since October and which is finally helping him make some progress. It all happens with the aid of rewards.... sigh. We are back living in the village in France and the constant lure is to play outside in the village: this is all he wants to do, it is his absolute priority in life.... He does have friends, continues to be highly sociable - I have noticed that being with people seems to help him, makes him more cheerful and equable and even helps his concentration. When we were in the UK, which is a rougher and less civilised environment, we had trouble with bullying - him being bullied, or allegedly bullied. He is SO hypersensitive, reacts to teasing with anger, by wanting to fight... thinks he has to "defend himself" by getting tough. He is generally kind and caring with younger children and animals, does have a lovely, sensitive side that is affectionate and sweet. I am sure your grandson does too! Last night, for example, J told me he wanted to write four "I love you"s and cut them out in the shape of a fish for his friends - as he was doing it, he was saying things like "Don't be jealous, Mummy!" and "Sorry I'm not making them for you, Mummy!" ... then at the end, he came to give me a hug and "secretly" taped them all to my back. It was sweet.

    But... he still has really angry outbursts when he is upset, "no" is really difficult - particularly with me - and he has what I call "mini meltdowns" almost every day when he is frustrated or disappointed. In other words, he has made very little progress indeed with managing his emotions. But because we have had to move so much (long, long story!!), he has not been able to have consistent help with this. It is an urgent need. He understands his own difficulties, talks about it - he is quite emotionally perceptive - talks about his "anger issues" (a phrase he learnt in the UK, other kids having used it about him) but I have not been able to help him devise methods of dealing with it. Partly because in his anger he is often/usually rude and insulting to me, and sometimes even lashes out at me physically - this I find extremely difficult and "triggering". He consistently says "sorry" afterwards and I can see he really means it - as if he really could not help himself during the outburst. He did have four sessions with an EMDR therapist in the UK and this seemed to really help him. The therapist thought he was a wonderful child and this is often people's reaction to J - most of his horrible, monstrous behaviour is reserved for me. I think we have definite attachment problems and one child psychiatrist diagnosed ODD - I think this is right at times but at other times he can be quite helpful and compliant so it is a bit baffling. As all these children are baffling.

    Anyway... as I say, I share this to underscore that really ADHD (and additions) just does not make for easy, smooth life. I have times when I feel like I cannot cope with J, cannot bear his behaviour and the constant intense reactions to everything... for the moment I have taken myself out of the school arena so don't have that to contend with!! But J really doesn't want to do school or to learn in conventional ways - he finds it horrendously boring and has no sense whatever of "future" or needing to go to school. He just wants to play with his pals... and school for him is just a place to go to be with other kids. So at least your boy has his smartness and sophisticated reading skills. That is a BIG advantage! Will things even out for him a bit at high school level, if his talents and abilities are encouraged? I really understand your fears for the future. J is basically a good kid but there are times I have seen a future only of crime and delinquency for him... which would be very sad, as it is for every kid who goes that way. I have tried so very hard to get appropriate schooling and therapeutic help for him and as of yet it just has not come together.

    Have to go - we have an appointment with the child pyschiatrist! Take care and look forward to hearing more of your news.