Got the first diagnosis

[Mac&Cheese]

Well my 6 yold difficult child has been diagnosis with ASHD/ODD. We tried Metadate a 2nd time d/t insistance of psychiatrist only this time 30mg instead of 10mg. First terrible rx I thought occurred when the 1st dose peaked after about 3 hr. psychiatrist informed me "OH NO, that was when the dose wore off. Soooo I bowed to the educated person and gave him 30mg yesterday. OMG!!! What an awful day, worst I ever had with him. Started 45 min after dose and finally ended 7 hrs later. Raging, angry, fighting, uncontrollable crying, etc., etc., also developed what I would call a tic. (puffing his cheeks out and blowing air) about every 1-2min. Thank goodness that stopped at about 11pm. I am done with drugs. Started researching herbal and diet approaches. Also will have him tested for food allergies. I guess he is one of those that just can't take medications. I am not willing to subject him to them again. I am still looking for someone to do a neuropsychologist evaluation. Can the school do this when he gets an IEP?
What an experience this has been! I am struggling with one last issue I hope some of you will give me your opinion. I have responses from some of you that said "The school is responsible for his behavior at school, don't punish him at home for school problems." My concern is that he won't get an education if we don't enforce discipline at home! What do most of you think? I also get phone calls from the teacher that make if loud and clear that I am expected to "Fix it"!! Thanks to all Linda

 

[BusynMember]

I wouldn't trust the school to do a Neuropscyh evaluation. I would go to somebody privately. You can find them at children's hospitals and university hospitals, and they last from 6-10 hours or more if you get a good one. Did your child have speech or motor delays or does he have trouble socializing with his peers?

 

[Wiped Out]

Most schools will not do a neuro-psychiatric evaluation and I'm with mwm in that I wouldn't trust them if they did (this coming from someone who works in the public school system).

My son does horrible on stimulants. He rages when on stimulants. For him it is due to his Bipolar. He is on medications that help his Bipolar and he needs them. I doubt very much I will ever try a stimulant again with my difficult child.

With my difficult child we try to let school problems be school problems in that we don't do a double punishment (unless it's an out of school suspension-I may sure that is no fun whatsoever). We talk to him and try to help him to understand why he needs to change the behaviors but we don't double up on punishments.

An iep should help because they should do a FBA (functional behavioral assessment) and then put into place a BIP (behavioral intervention plan) if it's behavior rather than just learning concerns.

 

[Nancy]

Linda,

We had a lot of school issues with my difficult child also. Some people told me to let the school deal with her and not punish her for what happened there. I couldn't do that, I felt it was our responsibility to reinforce the school rules. Not only was it desired by the school, it was expected that parents would. If she stole something from someone or hit someone on the playground or didn't follow the classroom rules, what lesson was I teaching by ignoring that.

I've talked to our high school resource officer and the local juvenile police detective numerous times. They tell me stories of kids getting into trouble at school and when they call the parents in, those parents that reinforce the school rules are the kids they feel will straighten out. The ones whose parents ignore it and don't take action, are the ones they see over and over again. Of course this isn't always the case but it is significant they say.

The jury is still out with us. We have backed the school when our difficult child was wrong, and we have stood behind and supported her when they were wrong. That has given us the respect with our school administrators that we needed to get our difficult child through high school. Looking back it would have saved a lot of trouble and sleepless nights if we just left her behavior up to the school, but in my heart I know that would not have taught her anything.

Nancy

 

[smallworld]

When a child has a bad reaction to a medication, it can mean one of three things: first, the medication isn't the right one; second, the dose isn't at the right level; or three, the diagnosis is wrong. While you may choose not to use medications, saying your child may be one who can't take medications after one trial isn't exactly accurate. We've had many bad medication reactions along the way, but getting the right diagnosis and the right medications has made all the difference in the lives of my kids. At this point, all three are more or less stable and doing well in their school environments (my daughters more than my son).

Having said all that, it is illegal for any school to say "fix it" by requiring you to give your child medications. Very often, children who exhibit certain behaviors in school do need an IEP for services and accommodations to help them access their education. What specific behaviors is your son exhibiting at school?

In terms of neuropsychologists, schools don't do extensive enough testing to encompass all of the testing involved in a comprehensive neuropsychologist evaluation. Neuropsychologists can be found at university and children's hospitals.

 

[LittleDudesMom]

I think smallworld said it all when she said -

When a child has a bad reaction to a medication, it can mean one of three things: first, the medication isn't the right one; second, the dose isn't at the right level; or three, the diagnosis is wrong. While you may choose not to use medications, saying your child may be one who can't take medications after one trial isn't exactly accurate.

I can tell you that I held off for over a year putting my son on medications. The first one we tried was the first you tired. And, it was awful for my son too. He then went on concerta and that work fabuously for over a year. Then, we had some issues the high incremental dose increases so we went to adderall. He is in 7th grade and has been on adderal since the winter of his 2nd grade year.

I think it is perfectly acceptable to try behavior mod and dietary means to help your son. I personally feel that all reasonable options should be explored first. But, one medication trial should not cause you to give up helping you son with medications. The right medication could make all the difference in the world.

In regards to school. I have a little different take than the "what happens at school stays in school". For the "little stuff", I agree. If he has been given a consequence, then it's done. There are two instances where we go further. One, incomplete classwork. If he doesn't understand or is struggling with a concept, it's excused. But, if he just didn't want to comply or was daydreaming and playing with his pens and pencils, etc., he has to complete that work before he begins on his homework. He has acquated not doing his classwork with less play time.

The other is when he crosses the line of invading someone's personal space with hands, feet, etc. In other words, he touches, pushes, kicks, hits, etc., someone else. Those are "everything with an on/off switch is gone" (tv, gameboy, computer, etc.) conseqence. The time they are not allowed depends on the offense.

I agree with Wiped Out about the BIP - you don't need an IEP for that. Sometimes the testing and stuff with an IEP can take several months. A BIP can be done within a week (then if you get the IEP, the BIP becomes part of it).

Good luck.

Sharon

 

[Mac&Cheese]

I so appreciate the wealth of info you all provided me. As I pull all your suggestions together, I think the first thing I need to do is have him better evaluated before any more medications are attempted. I will ask the school for a BIP and continue to discipline his worst behaviors at school. I feel much better! Experience is the BEST TEACHER!

 

[Hound dog]

Having a better evaluation is a good idea, most especially if you don't feel the diagnosis is correct or "fits" your difficult child. Holding off on medications is also a good idea until you're certain unless difficult child's behavior becomes out of control.

I'm also one who doesn't trust school evaluations. They diagnosed my grandson Alex with ADHD after "watching him in a room for 15 mins". K is headed for a new evaluation with a neuropsychologist herself.

Experience is the best teacher indeed. So sorry he had to go thru such a bad time with the medication.

((hugs))