I've been googling to find articles or websites that help grandparents in dealing with denial of difficult child's issues. mother in law mentioned a couple weeks ago that she felt she should have been involved in therapy since the beginning ~ so we took her to therapy. The therapist even said, "she just doesn't get it". So here we are going on the family tour tonight ~ I invited her a week ago when I made the appointment. Her reply at that time was let her sleep on it. Over the weekend it came up and she told me she was scared of the unknown ~ I replied that's why we're going: to learn. I asked yesterday if she was planning on going with us and she said she hadn't thought any more about it, but knew she needed to. So I called this morning at 10 and she said she's not going. I'm quite irritated and told her I don't want to hear any more complaining about not being involved. I have several thoughts on this: she's in denial or she's just too lazy to want to learn. I have given her 4 1/2 yrs worth of information that goes in one ear and out the other because she refuses to see. When she feels like talking about it, it's generally with other equally ignorant people and then they cluster flip it all up. My mom on the other hand, I give her information and she's off running looking for information or if she runs across an article, she'll email it to me. When I was telling her that we were trying to get him into a residential facility, she asked for the name and city ~ by the end of our conversation she was saying, "According to their website ....". My parents live 2000 miles away and see us once a year ~ mother in law lives a mile away and sees us once a week.