SuZir
Well-Known Member
I recently came to understanding I have some anxiety issues of my own. Some having to do with parenting a difficult child, some not. Things got recently worse by triggering situation, but that certainly isn't a beginning point of my issues. I have had some issues with sleep and that is making me feel crappy. First it was more that I had trouble falling sleep, but after working hard with the technique difficult child's mental coach taught him (I wrote something about that here in June) that has been better. Unfortunately I have been waking up around 2 a.m and not being able to go back to sleep again. And less than four hours sleep per night just doesn't cut it for me. I'm also having horrible nightmares quite often, several times a week at least. That is not fun either. Days are better but being exhausted doesn't help. I feel crabby, I have a much shorter fuse than normal and I have trouble being as effective as normal and concentrating. And I can get worked up easily and I have difficult time with transitions, especially if plans change. In other words: it's quite easy to believe difficult child is my son right now
Today I had an appointment with my primary doctor. She prescribed me Ambien to try at first. I'm little ambivalent with that. To my understanding Ambien helps you fall to sleep and that is going quite okay right now. The other option she offered would be antidepressants or Atarax. Atarax I could try, but I'm not eager to try SSRIs or Remeron. And it will be very cold day in downstairs before I would be ready to use benzoes in any regularity. She also referred me to psychologist to try to sort out my issues (appointment every two weeks till Christmas.)
Issues caused by difficult child she recommended me to try to find a group that deals with this sort of things. That may be a problem. We are not 'a therapy society' that for example USA is. There is much less any kind of groups or psycho-social therapy available. So my options are limited. Only 12 step based family group we have is al-anon and it is mostly for spouses (and separate groups for children of alcoholics.) And to be honest I'm not at all crazy for 12 steps approach anyway. When difficult child really crumbled I tried the group for parents with difficult kids, but I felt very misplaced there. other parents had kids who had really serious problems, who were juvenile group homes or even jail (and believe me, you have to practically kill someone to end up in jail around here) or who had serious drug addictions. I felt myself very silly complaining about my obnoxious kid who was making a living for himself (mostly) and also going to school and making absolute top grades. There are also groups available for family of mental health patients. Okay, my kid is diagnosed with PTSD, but I still suspect I would feel just as silly there. Local church offers parent group that would be more appropriate, but that has a lot of confidentiality issues. I would likely know many people there and I'm not too sure things would stay in the group, even when that of course is the rule. Same goes with other groups of course. I can't really talk much about my son's current situation without having to mention his rather unique situation and that would easily give away his identity. And that would be very unfair for him and could cause some troubles.
So basically I do understand I have issues and I understand I should do something to them, but I'm not really wanting to do it. (Again like mother like son.)
Today I had an appointment with my primary doctor. She prescribed me Ambien to try at first. I'm little ambivalent with that. To my understanding Ambien helps you fall to sleep and that is going quite okay right now. The other option she offered would be antidepressants or Atarax. Atarax I could try, but I'm not eager to try SSRIs or Remeron. And it will be very cold day in downstairs before I would be ready to use benzoes in any regularity. She also referred me to psychologist to try to sort out my issues (appointment every two weeks till Christmas.)
Issues caused by difficult child she recommended me to try to find a group that deals with this sort of things. That may be a problem. We are not 'a therapy society' that for example USA is. There is much less any kind of groups or psycho-social therapy available. So my options are limited. Only 12 step based family group we have is al-anon and it is mostly for spouses (and separate groups for children of alcoholics.) And to be honest I'm not at all crazy for 12 steps approach anyway. When difficult child really crumbled I tried the group for parents with difficult kids, but I felt very misplaced there. other parents had kids who had really serious problems, who were juvenile group homes or even jail (and believe me, you have to practically kill someone to end up in jail around here) or who had serious drug addictions. I felt myself very silly complaining about my obnoxious kid who was making a living for himself (mostly) and also going to school and making absolute top grades. There are also groups available for family of mental health patients. Okay, my kid is diagnosed with PTSD, but I still suspect I would feel just as silly there. Local church offers parent group that would be more appropriate, but that has a lot of confidentiality issues. I would likely know many people there and I'm not too sure things would stay in the group, even when that of course is the rule. Same goes with other groups of course. I can't really talk much about my son's current situation without having to mention his rather unique situation and that would easily give away his identity. And that would be very unfair for him and could cause some troubles.
So basically I do understand I have issues and I understand I should do something to them, but I'm not really wanting to do it. (Again like mother like son.)