Had a doctor's appoitment concerning my anxiety issues

SuZir

Well-Known Member
I recently came to understanding I have some anxiety issues of my own. Some having to do with parenting a difficult child, some not. Things got recently worse by triggering situation, but that certainly isn't a beginning point of my issues. I have had some issues with sleep and that is making me feel crappy. First it was more that I had trouble falling sleep, but after working hard with the technique difficult child's mental coach taught him (I wrote something about that here in June) that has been better. Unfortunately I have been waking up around 2 a.m and not being able to go back to sleep again. And less than four hours sleep per night just doesn't cut it for me. I'm also having horrible nightmares quite often, several times a week at least. That is not fun either. Days are better but being exhausted doesn't help. I feel crabby, I have a much shorter fuse than normal and I have trouble being as effective as normal and concentrating. And I can get worked up easily and I have difficult time with transitions, especially if plans change. In other words: it's quite easy to believe difficult child is my son right now ;)

Today I had an appointment with my primary doctor. She prescribed me Ambien to try at first. I'm little ambivalent with that. To my understanding Ambien helps you fall to sleep and that is going quite okay right now. The other option she offered would be antidepressants or Atarax. Atarax I could try, but I'm not eager to try SSRIs or Remeron. And it will be very cold day in downstairs before I would be ready to use benzoes in any regularity. She also referred me to psychologist to try to sort out my issues (appointment every two weeks till Christmas.)

Issues caused by difficult child she recommended me to try to find a group that deals with this sort of things. That may be a problem. We are not 'a therapy society' that for example USA is. There is much less any kind of groups or psycho-social therapy available. So my options are limited. Only 12 step based family group we have is al-anon and it is mostly for spouses (and separate groups for children of alcoholics.) And to be honest I'm not at all crazy for 12 steps approach anyway. When difficult child really crumbled I tried the group for parents with difficult kids, but I felt very misplaced there. other parents had kids who had really serious problems, who were juvenile group homes or even jail (and believe me, you have to practically kill someone to end up in jail around here) or who had serious drug addictions. I felt myself very silly complaining about my obnoxious kid who was making a living for himself (mostly) and also going to school and making absolute top grades. There are also groups available for family of mental health patients. Okay, my kid is diagnosed with PTSD, but I still suspect I would feel just as silly there. Local church offers parent group that would be more appropriate, but that has a lot of confidentiality issues. I would likely know many people there and I'm not too sure things would stay in the group, even when that of course is the rule. Same goes with other groups of course. I can't really talk much about my son's current situation without having to mention his rather unique situation and that would easily give away his identity. And that would be very unfair for him and could cause some troubles.

So basically I do understand I have issues and I understand I should do something to them, but I'm not really wanting to do it. :talkhand:(Again like mother like son.)
 

Calamity Jane

Well-Known Member
Hi Suz,
I'm sorry you're going through this now, but it's great that you've sought help.

One thing I noticed when you described your symptoms was that I have the same exact symptoms, but I think it's the onset of menopause! I'm 53, so I don't sleep all night, I have nightmares when I do sleep, fatigued during the day, short tempered, etc. Plus I too, have a difficult child. So I don't know if you're going through perimenopause or menopause, but wanted you to know that I've got the same thing. Take care.
 

DDD

Well-Known Member
been there done that! My Rx is for Ativan and I either take one pill at bedtime or pop 1/2 a pill in the middle of the night if I wake up. For me there have been no side effects and in the morning I feel normal. Good luck. DDD
 

SuZir

Well-Known Member
One thing I noticed when you described your symptoms was that I have the same exact symptoms, but I think it's the onset of menopause! I'm 53, so I don't sleep all night, I have nightmares when I do sleep, fatigued during the day, short tempered, etc. Plus I too, have a difficult child. So I don't know if you're going through perimenopause or menopause, but wanted you to know that I've got the same thing. Take care.

Good thinking. I hadn't even thought about that. I'm still little bit on the young side (especially considering ethnic, hereditary and other things that usually influence to the matter), but still this could be the first signs even though my body is still working like Swiss clock. But I will talk about this on my next Ob/Gyn appointment.

been there done that! My Rx is for Ativan and I either take one pill at bedtime or pop 1/2 a pill in the middle of the night if I wake up. For me there have been no side effects and in the morning I feel normal. Good luck. DDD

Thank you for the tip. For some reason I'm really wary with benzoes but I have to try taking half-dose if waking up, if taking before going to bed isn't helping to keep me asleep. I would feel silly taking a pill in the evening if I would still be waking up middle of the night, because really, I do fall asleep in reasonable time after going to bed. For that those mental exercises I copied from difficult child's 'workbook' have really helped.
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
Good for you for being proactive for yourself. :)

I used trazadone and seroquil (sp) mostly. Started with the trazadone, it worked great for a while, then when it didn't cut it.....the other was added. My problem was that my brain roared at about 120 mph soon as my head hit the pillow, and with multiple topics. None of the techniques I'd used to relax to sleep for years worked to shut that off. I could be dog tired to down right exhausted and still I couldn't fall asleep. If it did I woke up constantly. If either had a hang over effect in the morning I never noticed or it didn't last long enough for me to notice.

Lack of sleep alone can cause a whole mess of symptoms, while all you really need is sleep. Know what I mean?? So once you get your sleep cycle back into order, many of the things you've been noticing will probably disappear.

Hugs
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
SuZir, smart move to go to the doctor. I'd try the Ambien and just see how it works. I think it's worth a try.
I agree with-the others, that if you get sleep, you will feel so much better and it will really help your other issues.
They won't go away, but it will help immensely.
And I agree, talk to your OBGYN because those are also menopause symptoms.
I don't know what to say about a support group. I have gone to our local Al Anon and every single person there knew what Asperger's was, and they commented that many Aspies are alcoholics and use alcohol as a coping mechanism. Wow, didn't know that!
So maybe you can try another Al Anon group and keep trying until you get the right "fit."
Also, each group does its routine differently. One may go through the book chapter by chapter, one may pass around the book and let people read until they come to a part that strikes a chord with-them, thus sparking conversation, and one may not use a book at all. Again, you have to keep trying, hard as it is.
That's the only thing I can think of if you don't have parent support groups. You know, you may meet other moms in Al Anon and break off into a parenting group later on. It's a way toi meet people.
Sorry, it's a lot of work and I know you just want a nap ...
 

Star*

call 911........call 911
Suzir -

I'm proud of you for taking a positive direction step and being proactive about your own health and step - THAT in itself I MONUMENTAL......good for you.

Secondly? There are SO many more things out in the world for sleep that can help...and Well - why doctors always go right for this Ambien? I don't know. (shrugs) I agree with everyone else - try it, you may like it. I didn't. I have sleep walking issues to begin with - and well - suffice to say - it wasn't for me. I can have complete comversations and activities on Abmien, or Lunesta. I found complete and utter release with Flexeril. I take one about 3 hours before I want to go to sleep and I'm out like a light. It's also non-addicting. They also sell it as Zipsor. Helps with aches and pains. THere is also something called Midnight PM - it's holistic. Works fairly well - but I think it depends on your stress levels. Recently mine were - not midnight pm worthy. lol (ahem) Technically they were a fifth of Jack Daniels, a hot tub with Raoul, a Swedish massage with a guy named Sven whom I'd never see again, and probably 3 or four Peyote buttons in a Sioux sweat lodge strong - but I settled for a Flexeril. (grins and swears she'll never rat anyone out - hickup, and sticks tongue out to the side of her mouth and staggers off slightly...merely to hide the box of wine)

Anyway - I recently discovered learining how to BREATHE properly- and well? It's about the BEST dang thing I've ever learned. Sounds like I've still got a button or two stuck in my molars - but I promise you - If you TRULY want to learn how to relax? READ up on how to INHALE and EXHALE and find 15 minutes 3x a day learning how to take in and expel oxygen - an dyou will think you have found a magic elixir --------trust me on this.

Hugs & Love
Star
 

DDD

Well-Known Member
Have to tell ya that Raoul (and his delightfully aging Papa) are usually quite engaged and not likely to travel to your Country for a visit. :couple: Lordy I hope you are not "into" older Latin men. DDD
 
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