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General Parenting
Had a very traumatic day today with difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 632654" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>Sounds like you need immediate help for your own mental well being right now. You will be unable to deal with your daughter until you get yourself stronger. Please call you doctor's office now (do you have a psychologist or psychiatrist?) and let the nurse know what emotions you are fighting with. </p><p></p><p>You and your daughter may both be feeding into each other's vulnerable emotions. If you can get yourself back on track it might be the first step in getting her back on track. </p><p></p><p>Being 18 is so difficult these days. She may be struggling with watching others her age making fun, exciting plans for college, etc. and feels scared and alone as she does not feel ready for that level of independence. She takes everything out on you and makes poor choices to cover her negative feelings about life not being fair to her.</p><p></p><p>A psychologist may be able to help you understand the dynamics of your relationship with her and give you tools to help both of you. </p><p></p><p>I am a writer. I like to put things in writing and find that in the ugliest times journaling has helped me. When my difficult child has a therapist (psychologist) or psychiatrist (psychiatrist) appointment, I always have a written report to present. It covers events since the last appointment, what lead up to the situation, how the situation played out, and how I saw difficult child felt and/or myself felt before/during/after the event. I would often include a question such as, "What can we do to avoid this next time?"</p><p></p><p>Writing things down is also helpful to remind me at an appointment of everything I want to bring up as I find myself safe and content in the doctors office making my fears and concerns seem to diminish in severity so I either forget them or tell myself they are not serious enough to bring up. </p><p></p><p>Please keep in touch!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 632654, member: 5096"] Sounds like you need immediate help for your own mental well being right now. You will be unable to deal with your daughter until you get yourself stronger. Please call you doctor's office now (do you have a psychologist or psychiatrist?) and let the nurse know what emotions you are fighting with. You and your daughter may both be feeding into each other's vulnerable emotions. If you can get yourself back on track it might be the first step in getting her back on track. Being 18 is so difficult these days. She may be struggling with watching others her age making fun, exciting plans for college, etc. and feels scared and alone as she does not feel ready for that level of independence. She takes everything out on you and makes poor choices to cover her negative feelings about life not being fair to her. A psychologist may be able to help you understand the dynamics of your relationship with her and give you tools to help both of you. I am a writer. I like to put things in writing and find that in the ugliest times journaling has helped me. When my difficult child has a therapist (psychologist) or psychiatrist (psychiatrist) appointment, I always have a written report to present. It covers events since the last appointment, what lead up to the situation, how the situation played out, and how I saw difficult child felt and/or myself felt before/during/after the event. I would often include a question such as, "What can we do to avoid this next time?" Writing things down is also helpful to remind me at an appointment of everything I want to bring up as I find myself safe and content in the doctors office making my fears and concerns seem to diminish in severity so I either forget them or tell myself they are not serious enough to bring up. Please keep in touch! [/QUOTE]
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