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General Parenting
Had an interesting, if gutwrenching therapy appointment
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 9141" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>As most of you know I go to therapy for my own issues of which I have many. I am a major difficult child in my own right. Of course while discussing my issues we also talk about issues regarding Cory. Things overlap. </p><p></p><p>Well yesterday we were talking about Cory and discussing how he seems to fit either narcissistic or borderline pd along with the bipolar. Im not completely convinced he doesnt just have the personality disorders. My therapist thinks he has both since he started exhibiting behaviors when he was so young. </p><p></p><p>But...and here is the kicker. She sat and got tears in her eyes as I came to the realization that if we were laying the blame for MY borderline problems at the feet of my mom for abusing me, then I have to lay the blame for Corys personality disorders squarely at my feet. </p><p></p><p>I cant have it both ways.</p><p></p><p>So in a way it is a parenting problem. Somehow I screwed him up. Maybe it was being a borderline/bipolar screwed up parent that didnt have adequate mental health care that caused him to be the way he is. I know for a fact that I didnt abuse him in the way my mom abused me. I know I messed up big time over the years. I could have done things better. I wasnt a good parent. I could have done things so much better. But I didnt try to hurt them. I didnt burn them or beat them bloody. I didnt starve them or lock them in closets or withhold love. I wasnt suzy homemaker that is for sure. </p><p></p><p>So...this is something to think about.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 9141, member: 1514"] As most of you know I go to therapy for my own issues of which I have many. I am a major difficult child in my own right. Of course while discussing my issues we also talk about issues regarding Cory. Things overlap. Well yesterday we were talking about Cory and discussing how he seems to fit either narcissistic or borderline pd along with the bipolar. Im not completely convinced he doesnt just have the personality disorders. My therapist thinks he has both since he started exhibiting behaviors when he was so young. But...and here is the kicker. She sat and got tears in her eyes as I came to the realization that if we were laying the blame for MY borderline problems at the feet of my mom for abusing me, then I have to lay the blame for Corys personality disorders squarely at my feet. I cant have it both ways. So in a way it is a parenting problem. Somehow I screwed him up. Maybe it was being a borderline/bipolar screwed up parent that didnt have adequate mental health care that caused him to be the way he is. I know for a fact that I didnt abuse him in the way my mom abused me. I know I messed up big time over the years. I could have done things better. I wasnt a good parent. I could have done things so much better. But I didnt try to hurt them. I didnt burn them or beat them bloody. I didnt starve them or lock them in closets or withhold love. I wasnt suzy homemaker that is for sure. So...this is something to think about. [/QUOTE]
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Had an interesting, if gutwrenching therapy appointment
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