difficult child 2 got physical Thursday evening after a day and a half of increasingly irritable and hypomanic behavior. We called 911 when he kicked in one of the doors. PD didn't arrive for 25 minutes and by then he had crashed and was inside asleep. So I talked to the officers and they left. Friday we were supposed to go out of town (3 hour drive up to small town in mountains) to attend 80th birthday party for Grandpa and Great-Aunt. Didn't get 2 miles from home before we turned around and came back. difficult child 3/easy child went out of her way to pick a fight with difficult child 2 who of course obliged her. All over a bag of chex mix I didn't know difficult child 2 had brought with him. Of course there was only one bag. So I stayed home with difficult child 2 who had been beating on the back of his sister's car seat and stood up in the minivan and got physically threatening. SO, difficult child 3/easy child and oldest difficult child 1 went on without us. The plan was for difficult child 2 and I to drive up separately after he calmed down. Didn't happen. Instead difficult child 2 escalated. I refused to let him play video games - when he's like this they just agitate him further. So he started shoving me around and when I retreated to my bedroom with the deadbolt locked pounded on the door telling me he was going to break it down and beat me up. I was really hoping that if I withdrew and didn't respond to him he'd de-escalate on his own so I just stayed quiet while he beat on the door. After a couple minutes he stopped and I could hear him leave the house. Waited a couple more minutes and went out to see what was going on. He wasn't in the house. So I picked up the phone and went to the front door which was standing wide open. Started to step out onto the porch when difficult child 2 came around the front corner of the garage with a 3' length of heavy PVC pipe. As soon as he saw me he started rushing at me yelling that he was going to beat me up. I was able to yank the security door shut (who knew I would be glad I installed the ugly thing so I could keep my own son out ) and he beat on the security door with the pipe while I called 911. I talked to the 911 dispatcher where my son could hear me describe him as a mentally ill 13 yo. He yelled at me to stop talking to the dispatcher and telling her stuff about him. By the time I had hung up he was beating on the 3 year old trees in the front yard with the pipe. Then he stood where I could see him and picked up the garden hose, wrapped it around his neck and pulled on the ends like he was trying to kill himself. Lots of high drama. Eventually he wound down some and then completely disappeared from view. After 10 minutes I cautiously stepped outside to see if he'd taken off down the street. Won't do that again. Anyway once I got off the front porch and was able to see down the street he came out from behind the car and ran past me into the house. Locked the security door and told me he wanted me to know how it felt to be locked out of my own house. I just stood several feet away and didn't respond until he started crying (predictable at that point) and then asked him to open the door which he did. Then he left the house and ran into the backyard. I watched from inside the house as he took off his sox and sat with his feet in the cold pool, curled up tight sobbing. Since I was locked inside my house and they had a simultaneous shooting to deal with it took the cops about 25 minutes to get there again. The officer that came was one of the ones from the night before. While I was talking to him at the front door difficult child 2 came in from the backyard cause he heard the doorbell ring. I called him into the dining room and the cop confronted him there. When difficult child 2 gave him attitude the cop just put him in handcuffs with no warning or fuss. Whoa - that got difficult child 2's attention let me tell you. He started blustering and crying and the cop just stood there for a couple minutes and then told him to shut the f&*& up. So stupid kid difficult child 2 uses profanity back at the cop who tells him he doesn't get to talk that way to the cop and to shut up. Anyway, long story shorter, this was an absolutely great cop. He spent almost 30 minutes here talking to difficult child 2. He tried to get difficult child 2 to talk to him about what had caused difficult child 2 to get angry - got a little out of him but not much. Tried to get difficult child 2 to calm himself down with breathing and not talking - worked but took a long time. Let difficult child 2 tell his side and then made difficult child 2 sit and listen while I told mine. difficult child 2 admitted my version was mostly right (his was considerably different of course). The cop told difficult child 2 I owned difficult child 2 and this time it would be up to me whether difficult child 2 went with the cop or not. But the cop and I told difficult child 2 that if I had to call them again, difficult child 2 would be going to juvey whether he belonged there or not. Cop spent at least 5 minutes trying to really talk to difficult child 2 after he'd calmed down. Took the cuffs off him and got down on his level (difficult child 2 was sitting on the floor in a heap). Told difficult child 2 his family were the only people who really cared about him and he shouldn't do this to his family cause he needed them. We were the ones who were going to take care of him if he got beat up by somebody. We were the ones who were going to get called to bail him out if he got taken to jail. Also told him that he had an anger issue and it didn't matter what his diagnosis was that it was difficult child 2's choice how to handle things and that difficult child 2 had to decide he wasn't going to let other people get to him. That difficult child 2 had to get help with the anger and find somebody to talk to about his problems and feelings. Told difficult child 2 that everybody had problems, he wasn't any different from anyone else. He was going to have to learn to handle the problems or his life was going to be really hard. Said he (the officer) was ADHD but he didn't let that run him. Told difficult child 2 if he didn't learn to handle things better he was going to see the back of a squad car a lot and spend time in jail with people who were MUCH bigger fish. Talked about the killers and gang members that difficult child 2 might end up in jail with. So I agreed to let difficult child 2 stay and the cop left. I was really upset about missing the family gathering. I made difficult child 2 do a bunch of chores and lay down for an hour. When he did all that calmly without a fuss, even slept a bit, I decided that I was going to go ahead and drive us up. Everything went fine for the first 90 minutes. Then he got a little mad when I wouldn't turn the radio to his station. After I finished listening to my show I changed the channel but we lost the signal pretty soon after that. We started talking a little and eventually he started saying how he couldn't ever do anything right. I went through the litany of things he was doing right/making good choices. He continued to insist he was picked on, etc and I refused to go along with that. Told him HIS behavior had a lot to do with what was happening in his life. He tried to blame his sister. I said his sister was not even in the same town when I called the cops this afternoon so there was no way he could blame that on her. Things went downhill from there but not very far or for very long. When we went from conversation to him being defiant and disrespectful I told him I wasn't taking him to the family gathering if he continued to do that or if I thought he was going to behave that way up there. He accused me of keeping him from going to his grandfather's party for no reason and promised he would act any way he pleased up there. Turned the car around and came back home. He carried on for a while but never got violent and finally fell asleep. Last night about an hour after we got home (difficult child 2 went straight to bed and was out like a light in 3 minutes) I discovered that I don't have any of my medications and only have part of his medications. The missing medications are in the stuff that got packed. I was in a hurry and just tossed a couple of bottles into the communal medications bag while we were packing and it did not even occur to me to go grab those bottles back out before SO left Friday evening. GAH!!! So this morning I am trying to figure out what to do. There is no way I can go the whole weekend without my own medications or him without all of his. I don't see any solution but to go up there. No refills pending that I can call in early. No way I can get partials - called and asked the pharmacy and they said if I got partials on the 5 essential medications for the two of us for the next 2 days it would be over $150 - crazy - the insurance won't cover any of it of course. So I am going to wake up difficult child 2 and try to drive up there. Don't know what I'm going to do about letting him go to the party. Wish me luck folks.