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He won't bathe/she won't comb her hair!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="trinityroyal" data-source="post: 67906" data-attributes="member: 3907"><p>Hello MWM,</p><p>We faced the same issue with our older son. He's 17 and puts up a fight every day about the shower. I think it's to do with hyper-sensitivity in my difficult child's case, as another poster mentioned...the sound of the water, the slimy feel of the soap, even the squeaky noise made by his feet on the bathtub floor. Sigh.</p><p>He used to "fake shower" by sticking his hair under the water and pouring a bit of shampoo on his head so the bathroom would be all steamy and he'd smell soapy clean. Until a few hours later, of course, when he'd be smelling like the bear enclosure at the zoo.</p><p></p><p>What has worked really well for us is a combination of things. Here goes...</p><p></p><p>1) Shower checklist. I made a list of all of the different parts of the shower (1. Turn on the water. 2 adjust the temperature 3. take off your clothes 4. step under the shower 5. wet your hair...etc) My difficult child has trouble with exeutive function, and needs to have the task broken down for him.</p><p></p><p>2) Post-shower inspection. My darling SO gives him the "sniff test" after the shower. If he doesn't pass, he has to turn around immediately and go have another one. The first time we did this, he pitched a tantrum and then went and had a proper shower. After 3 days of being forced to take a second shower, he came out of the bathroom on the 4th day and proclaimed. "Hmmm...I was working really hard today, and I'm not sure I did a proper job in there. I'd better go in again, just to make sure." In other words, Mom and Dad aren't going to buy the fake shower, so I'd better go have a real one.</p><p></p><p>3) Body wash or gel. I got a gigantic bottle of body wash with a pump dispenser at Wal-Mart. It doesn't feel slimy and mushy like the soap, so difficult child is more inclined to use it. I've also found that bubble bath for little kids (Mr. Bubble, for example) works really well. Added bonus, he likes the smell.</p><p></p><p>As for the dirty clothes thing, our main bathroom has one of those strange laundry hamper pullout things built into the vanity. Since difficult child thinks it's a cool gadget, he actually likes to put his dirty clothes in it. I'm not sure where you get one or if they're easy to install (it was already there when we moved into the house), but it seems to be working for him.</p><p></p><p>That being said, sometimes our difficult child gets away from us too, and he walks around smelling rotten. I think it's something he'll always struggle with. </p><p></p><p>With regard to your daughter's hair, here are a few suggestions (I'm mixed race and have very fine, flyaway, corkscrew-curly hair)</p><p></p><p>1) Do not chemically straighten it. Those chemical straighteners are very harsh and can cause permanent damage to your daughter's hair.</p><p></p><p>2) Curly hair has a tendency to be dry. I use a shampoo+conditioner to wash, followed by regular conditioner. After that, I use a leave-in moisturizer cream.</p><p></p><p>3) If your daughter wants to wear pony tails, make sure that she's using coated hair elastics. I buy them in bulk at Wal-Mart. They hold really well and don't snag in your hair. (They break easily though, which is why I buy 40 or so at a time) The moisture cream will help to prevent the breakage at the hairline, and the snagless elastics won't hurt as much.</p><p></p><p>Hope this all helps.</p><p>All the best,</p><p>Trinity.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="trinityroyal, post: 67906, member: 3907"] Hello MWM, We faced the same issue with our older son. He's 17 and puts up a fight every day about the shower. I think it's to do with hyper-sensitivity in my difficult child's case, as another poster mentioned...the sound of the water, the slimy feel of the soap, even the squeaky noise made by his feet on the bathtub floor. Sigh. He used to "fake shower" by sticking his hair under the water and pouring a bit of shampoo on his head so the bathroom would be all steamy and he'd smell soapy clean. Until a few hours later, of course, when he'd be smelling like the bear enclosure at the zoo. What has worked really well for us is a combination of things. Here goes... 1) Shower checklist. I made a list of all of the different parts of the shower (1. Turn on the water. 2 adjust the temperature 3. take off your clothes 4. step under the shower 5. wet your hair...etc) My difficult child has trouble with exeutive function, and needs to have the task broken down for him. 2) Post-shower inspection. My darling SO gives him the "sniff test" after the shower. If he doesn't pass, he has to turn around immediately and go have another one. The first time we did this, he pitched a tantrum and then went and had a proper shower. After 3 days of being forced to take a second shower, he came out of the bathroom on the 4th day and proclaimed. "Hmmm...I was working really hard today, and I'm not sure I did a proper job in there. I'd better go in again, just to make sure." In other words, Mom and Dad aren't going to buy the fake shower, so I'd better go have a real one. 3) Body wash or gel. I got a gigantic bottle of body wash with a pump dispenser at Wal-Mart. It doesn't feel slimy and mushy like the soap, so difficult child is more inclined to use it. I've also found that bubble bath for little kids (Mr. Bubble, for example) works really well. Added bonus, he likes the smell. As for the dirty clothes thing, our main bathroom has one of those strange laundry hamper pullout things built into the vanity. Since difficult child thinks it's a cool gadget, he actually likes to put his dirty clothes in it. I'm not sure where you get one or if they're easy to install (it was already there when we moved into the house), but it seems to be working for him. That being said, sometimes our difficult child gets away from us too, and he walks around smelling rotten. I think it's something he'll always struggle with. With regard to your daughter's hair, here are a few suggestions (I'm mixed race and have very fine, flyaway, corkscrew-curly hair) 1) Do not chemically straighten it. Those chemical straighteners are very harsh and can cause permanent damage to your daughter's hair. 2) Curly hair has a tendency to be dry. I use a shampoo+conditioner to wash, followed by regular conditioner. After that, I use a leave-in moisturizer cream. 3) If your daughter wants to wear pony tails, make sure that she's using coated hair elastics. I buy them in bulk at Wal-Mart. They hold really well and don't snag in your hair. (They break easily though, which is why I buy 40 or so at a time) The moisture cream will help to prevent the breakage at the hairline, and the snagless elastics won't hurt as much. Hope this all helps. All the best, Trinity. [/QUOTE]
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