Hello all, I haven't been on for awhile. I was really trying to move on and just let my son live his life. The holidays are hard. He has been distant for awhile. Not answering texts until a few days later. Never calling unless something is wrong. (Locked himself out of his place 2x's in less than 30 days which was unusual). Seems like him and the girl on now just friends.. I mailed him his presents and got a thank you the next day. Then he goes silent again. He called tonight which was odd.. I couldn't bring myself to speak to him and now I feel it may have been the last time I could have... He told my husband he was in the hospital 2x's in the past week. My husband either doesn't listen good or can't remember what he said but he said he thinks he said he had to stay overnight....Something about not being able to stop throwing up which he had before when he drank heavily. This time he told my husband it was from smoking too much weed... So not sure how much time he missed at work. We mailed him a nice cash present for Christmas and now looking back should not have. When I mailed it, I didn't know he was back to drinking heavily again. He seemed to be sad my husband said and I thought my son ended the conversation abruptly. He told my husband he took sleeping pills and they were kicking in so he hung up. Just makes me wonder if he took too many at one time and is planning on ending his life. He told my husband he hates being alone and needs a girlfriend.... Seriously, he won't follow any recommendations. Was in Sober living for a whopping 30 days and left because he didn't want to do Intensive outpatient therapy. He always thinks his ways are the best and obviously they are not. If he stayed in sober living and gave himself a chance to be sober longer than 2 weeks or 30 days, he would have people around him and not be alone. He lives so far away from home and doesn't have a car so him moving home would be not be a good option for him. I don't know when he will finally get it or if he will always be this way. Breaks my heart.