I am trying to learn how to navigate this site and found a group pertaining to adoption but could not figure out how to post. We adopted my nephew who is now 5...it has been 2 1/2 years and while there has been 85% improvement with him it is still hard to even be in the same room with him. We also have two other biological children. Our home often feels unlike a family when he is home and is wonderful if he happens to gone. This brings great guilt with it. He has been diagnosed...ADHD(combined type), ptsd, victim of sexual assault, and a disturbance disorder. I am seeking to "like" him and to want to be in the same room as him(without a nauseous pit in my stomach) and also to be able to be a "mommy' to him...not just his caretaker. He is very affectionate and loving...it is me who does not reciprocate in those feelings. I know he is suffering inside and know that if he can have the right tools leading to somewhat happiness it will start healing for us all. I'm not sure how to explain his behavior except that it's normal stuff magnified by one hundred thousand and he just has a way of getting under your skin. His pre-k teacher said she has to grit her teeth sometimes just to talk to him...this made me feel great! It's not just me! So, I have just gotten the internet and am searching for "others" who understand and can stand beyond the the hurtful advise of friends and family who are trying to "help." I have recently suffered a few mini "breakdowns" and have felt hopeless....though church helped me thru that one I am thinking that the right support system may be a nice asset in these endless days.