Good day, or not. I haven't been here for awhile other than reading. Not posting. I thought we were making some progress in our lives. J.. difficult child #1 whom we adopted back in September seemed to be making some strides with a few humps in the road. I hate to say it, but I was finally at my last option with her as far as discipline went and put a belt on her butt 3 days in a row (lying, stealing, etc). Alas.. something that really did SOMETHING about her behavior, even though I never wanted to go that route. NOTHING else was working! We do therapy, she has psychiatric appts every month, we talk to her, we ground, we take away privileges, we put her in the corner, we put her on the wall, we work towards rewards, etc.. spanking finally made her straighten up... EXCEPT for the stealing and drawing while in class and not getting her classwork done. It is basically a daily thing for her take things that don't belong to her, and frankly, after two years, it is getting quite old. She will NOT ask the owner if she can borrow their stuff. She simply just takes it. (She has NO trouble asking for ice cream, cake, tv time, computer time, etc). Getting in trouble has made no indention on this problem, even if she has to apologize. She has still been chronically picking and is on medications for it. She has a huge crater on her forehead right now from picking. Today was about my last straw with her after I get an email from her math teacher telling me she had a razor blade in her class today! The teacher took it away, howeover, my "nice and innocent" little child here went back up to the desk after the teacher was not looking and took it back! The teacher went to her in her 4th grade class and asked her where it was since she knew that she had taken it back. She stated that she lost it in her Science class the period before. Science teacher cannot find it in her room. I told the teacher to send her to the Dean's office for having a "weapon" and let her feel the consequences of having such a thing in her possession and then taking it back after it was taken from her. She wanted to send her to the Counselor. I said, whatever it takes to get through her little head that this is NOT acceptable. I start getting ready because I was just going to go up to the school and have her escorted out of class and brought to me in the office. About that time, the Dean calls me and he has her in his office. Yippee. Well, she didn't get expelled, however, she is getting written up for unacceptable behavior. They did check her to try to find it. He said that she had a pencil sharpener (makeup sharpener) that she had taken from her sisters makeup bag. She said it "broke", however, knowing her tendency to destroy things to see how they work, are put together, etc... I think she broke it on purpose. Instead of putting it in the trash, she put the plastic piece in her pencil bag and was playing with the razor. I am not sure what was going through her head as to why she does these kinds of things, and I have no idea what she was planning on doing with the razor. Play with it, hurt herself, or hurt someone else. A bit of history here.... oldest sister was a cutter, and since J does pick and gouge at herself and is hyposensitive.. that is not far off base in my thinking. Also, when she first came to us 2 years ago, MANY of her stories were about kids being chased and killed by monsters carrying knives and axes. Bloody stories. I stopped that as far as writing such things. Then she has had this fixation in the last 6 months or so with drawing "Sexy Purple Ninja" women carrying knives. Says that her friend likes Ninjas, so she is always drawing them for her? I told her she was NO longer allowed to draw such things and to concentrate on drawing pretty and nice things. She has been found standing and staring at not only her younger sister, but myself, while we are sleeping. That in itself is pretty freaky stuff. She has NO behavioral "issues" at school other than the drawing when she isn't supposed to be and not turning homework in once in awhile.. so not a real discipline problem there. At home, she is quiet, however, she has her issues that they do not see at school. Lying, stealing, destroying things that do not belong to her, sneaking, etc.. to gain what she wants. I have to go behind her continually to make sure she isn't sneaking or stealing, but somehow, someway, she does. I know that kids do these things, but this is an EVERY day thing with this child. She DOES know right from wrong, but chooses to just do whatever it is she feels like doing. She is on medications for anxiety and depression and for the picking/hyposensitivity. I have sent an email to our therapist to see if I just sit on this for a few days, or if we need to do something NOW. Right now, she will NOT have a life such as what she has known. She will be sleeping at the foot of our bed and I will be with her aside from school every single day. She will not even be allowed to go to the bathroom by herself. She is 15 and this behavior is totally unacceptable in any way, shape, or form. She was caught yesterday with my daughters gold hoop earrings! A few days before, she was caught with her sisters fingernail clippers because I had taken hers away because she was not clipping her fingernails, but tearing her pencil up with them! Two weeks ago, she destroyed my oldest daughters graduation tassel and then tried to hide it! Ugh!!! I will take something from her and she will turn around and try to sneak it right back. Ooooo la la!!! Drinking a glass of wine doesn't cut it. I need a PEPSI! LOL And this too shall pass, but boy, it feels good to type it out and to read that there are a lot of other wonderful mothers out there that do so much for their difficult child children. However, those children, due to their impulsivity or their lack of empathy or understanding for what they put their family through, are out there and doing the same type of things daily. I pray daily for you women, and of course, for myself, and all those wonderful families out there going through the same things. Bless you!