Help! Need advice on finding a therapist

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by firehorsewoman, May 31, 2012.

  1. Help.

    I received an e-mail from the ex telling me if difficult children behavior does not improve by end of summer he will either 1) request that I get 100% custody of him or 2) send him to a boarding school/facility.

    My son's behavior is the worst at my home. There is no way I can handle him on my own 100% of the time. I do not have any friends nor family here. It is hard enough having him ten days a month by myself.

    Although not a complete surprise that things are not as perfect at his house as he has led the doctors and me to believe, still it was unexpected. He has never said once to the doctors that he has a problem with difficult child's behavior in his home. It has always been that difficult child just has ADHD and all the behavior problems occur at my house. I have begged him to call the doctors today and let them in on the whole story. I really hope he does. Of course I will call the doctors but once again, if it is my word against his, it will do little good. They have never been interested in reading our e-mail correspondence about difficult child.

    We need behavioral therapy as well a better medical plan. Things are clearly not well at either home. My son has been treated at Texas Children's hospital for years but unfortunately they do not have a behavior therapy program nor have they been helpful at referring us to a therapist. I spoke to them about this AGAIN at his appointment last month. The times we have tried on our own to find someone to help us has been a waste of time and money so we have given up on therapy over the past two years.

    Any advice on finding someone to help us? Anyone in Houston with a recommendation for a therapist?

    Also, anyone out there have a difficult child on Risperdal even with elevated Prolactin? difficult child's meltdowns were milder and less frequent when he was on Risperdal but doctors pulled him off it two years ago when his Prolactin became elevated (no physical symptoms.)

    thanks in advance
  2. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I have no experience with-those medications, sorry to say.

    I don't know doctors in Houston, but I would type in "Houston support group for out of control kids" or something because you may get personal recommendations that way.
    Otherwise, you have to go through the phone book and literally visit one after another to find one that works well with-you.
    We got our best recommendations from teachers at school, and then went back and told them they were right, and kept the word going.

    Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) is a good start, because it can really mess up a kid's head and emotions. But there may be more going on. Call around until you can find a good neuropsychologist (I made the mistake of going to a neuropsychiatrist and he blew me off in 5 seconds flat).
  3. Another thing I would suggest would be to contact your local mental health association. They might be able to point you in the direction of a therapist that specializes in children with ADHD. Or they might be able to help you locate an ADHD centre or support group and you can meet some parents that have been there done that and get some advice from them.

    That would be a start. I would say that teachers and other parents will probably help you cut through the bs and find the right doctor as quickly as possible.

    Best of luck! Hope your ex does what you asked and finally admits to the docs that things are not good with difficult child at his place either.
  4. buddy

    buddy New Member

    You still have the email right? Well, he just blew his cover! Print it, save it, copy it, bring it everywhere and call him on it. Noone wants to send their kid away if things are even a little tough at home. DUH!!!! He was playing good cop that is all, just abusing you. (sorry, that was judgmental, but it seems so selfish because it denied appropriate treatment for your son to make it look like it was a mommy issue.)

    I didn't read your other post yet, I imagine people have asked this already. Has he ever had a complete neuropsychologist evaluation to see what is up with having that many symptoms (adhd, ODD, sensory integration, etc.)....these can sometimes be underlying issues to a bigger issue like mental health things (bipolar) or neuro-developmental things like non verbal learning disability, aspergers/Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD), and other types pervasive learning issues.

    I think, others here know better, but a boarding school would not solve his (hubby's) problem anyway... IF it is not a school specifically set up for therapeutic intervention, he is likely to meet kids and be in situations where things escalate. In other situations where staff is around his behavior may not be tolerated and you could be faced with his being kicked out or suspended if not called in for meeting after meeting.

    Sounds like what you said is more important. Getting a handle on things as a team. Wish he would be a part of that with you but it is no longer his word against yours, he already fessed up!
  5. chloedancer

    chloedancer New Member

    Is there any trauma history? The trauma academy is in Houston.