Help with 6 daughter

[minders040779]

Hi, I'm new to this and am in need of some advice. I have a wonderful 6 year old daughter who has ADHD, ODD and mood disorder (not otherwise specified) From all my research and books I've read, I'm pretty sure she has bi-polar. We are struggling to find good help for her. We live in SD so not much help here. The Dr. she was currently seeing is moving. The clinic did not set us up with a new doctor so we are alone in finding a new one. We don't have much child psychologists here in SD. Another problem we are having is she is good at school. She has been in trouble one time on the bus, which I am proud of her for this, but it is frustrating. We have had lots of problems with her since the age of 1. My husband and I walk on egg shells most of the time because we never know when a blow up will happen. She loves to make my husband and I fight, my mom and I, everyone close to each other. I have cried so many times at night because I don't know what to do anymore. She has been hospitalized twice for hurting her 3 year old sister bad enough to have bruises all over her face. We had to put her in our room because my youngest is no longer safe. We have seen a physiologist (medication Dr.) since 4 years old, counselors since 4. I have the bipolar child book, explosive child, how to control your anger and others. It seems like all I live by is how to improve Kaylee. We have tried time outs, many sticker charts, sending her to her room to calm down. None of these help when she is unstable. We tell her to listen to us but it is so hard to get through to her. My youngest is showing signs of everything she has been through with Kaylee, too much! Do any of you have kids that can control there behavior in school? Does it sound like my daughter has bi-polar? Should I push the new Dr. to diagnose and treat her? She has been on many stimulants and she would be up for days because of those, and it made her anger so so so much worse. She has been on respidol which helped with her anger and hurting my youngest. But the Dr. took her off it with the last hospitalization! Of course, she was good there too. Her school said she does best in routine setting like school. She gets days where everything is funny, discipline and all. We can't stop her from doing bad stuff on days like these. Do any of you have kids that can control there behavior in school? Does it sound like my daughter has bi-polar? Should I push the new Dr. to diagnose and finally treat her? Sorry about the rambling but it feels so good to talk about it.

 

[tiredmommy]

Hello and welcome. I'm sorry you have to be here, but I'm sure you'll get a ton of support. Many parents in remote areas find they need to travel and/or move to access the health care their children need.

You may want to check out our FAQ/Board Help forum to learn how to do a profile signature, figure out the abbreviations we use and how to do a parent input report.

It sounds like you also need a crisis plan in place to keep your younger child safe during rages. Also, most children with bipolar or mood disorders destabilize when on stimulants. I would think you would want her on a mood stabilizer first, but I'm not a doctor.

 

[Big Bad Kitty]

Hello and welcome to the board!

My daughter is an ANGEL in school. She comes home and acts like she runs the house. It's pretty common.

Is there a children's hospital or a learning university near you? I would contact one or the other and see about getting your child in for a neuropsychologist evaluation. They are very thorough. A lot of times, ADHD/ODD is diagnosis'd as the catch-all diagnosis. You certainly want to know if there is more to it.

Best of luck, and many hugs.

 

[smallworld]

Mindy, welcome! I'm glad you found us.

We're not doctors and can't diagnose over the internet. No one here knows whether your daughter has bipolar disorder. However, bipolar disorder is a specific kind of a mood disorder, and quite often, BiPolar (BP) and mood disorder are treated with the same medications (first-line mood stabilizers and atypical antipsychotics). You have a child who has reacted poorly to stimulants. You have violent behavior in the home that is putting your younger child at risk. That ought to be enough to get a good child psychiatrist to sit up and take notice, even without pushing the doctor into a BiPolar (BP) diagnosis.

I know there is a nationwide shortage of child psychiatrists, and it's even more challenging to find good psychiatric care in rural states like South Dakota. Have you checked the physician finder at the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatrists website?

Children's and university teaching hospitals might also be good bets, even if they involve a few hours of driving.

I hope you are able to make headway soon.

 

[Christy]

I don't have anything new to add but I just wanted to say welcome to the site. We understand how much time and effort goes into trying to help our children. This is a great place to seek advice and also to vent about our struggles.

Glad you foud us,
Christy