Help with a "hands on" kid!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Audrey, Sep 29, 2009.

  1. Audrey

    Audrey New Member

    We are currently evaluating my son (5 yo in KG) for Asperger's. He's been diagnosed with Sensory Integration Disorder (SID).

    His KG teacher is having a really hard time with him in school. He is constantly touching other kids (particularly boys) and getting too far into other people's personal space. She's trying all kinds of different redirection techniques without much help.

    He does this at home too, but we can easily tell him to stop or redirect him. But, in a room with 20 kids, he's too overstimulated and can't control it.

    KG teacher asked me if it would help him to have something else in his hands all the time. At home, he's always carrying a car or plane around. If not, his hands are in his mouth or on something. At school...he's got to keep his hands to himself.

    Any tips on what sort of thing he could carry with him at school? Can't send a toy with him.
  2. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    What about one of those stress relief balls? Or is that too much like a toy?

    Welcome to the site!
  3. TPaul

    TPaul Idecor8

    I am not extremely knowledgeable about Asperger's, but is this behavior a symptom of this condition. I thought that many have trouble with expression around others, is more inverted. They have problems with social interaction with others, or lack of interaction instead of what your difficult child is showing.

    I am just beginning to learn about the many conditions that our children can cope and live with, so if I am wrong, please forgive me. Could he not have possibly a higher functioning type of autism, if not something completely different.

    What other type of actions or interpersonal socializing problems does he seem to possibly have?

  4. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member


    I have a now sixteen year old who was diagnosed with Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified, upgraded to Aspergers and he is truly doing really well (I wanted to give you tons and tons of good feelings and hope). As for the touch bit, L. never touched anyone, but he touched THINGS and put his hands and fingers in his mouth. He was allowed to use stress balls and really to bring anything to school that would help. However, we chose to let him spend half a day in a small Special Education class so that he also had a aide that he shared who could redirect him when he started picking at his scabs for example.

    I think you're on the right track, trying to have him hold something. Is he in a regular class? Have you maybe thought of putting him into a smaller group? That could also help alleviate the anxiety that these kids feel when around large groups. If not, I recommend an aide. He just can't go around touching other kids, even if it's not his fault. He may outgrow the excessive touching. My son doesn't do that anymore. In the meantime, he needs some gentle help, such as an aide who can focus on him while the teacher focuses on the other kids.

    I also think social skills classes are great for Aspies. They have so much trouble understanding how to socialize and "getting" social norms. My son is soooooooooooooooooo much better. He pretty much knows now, although he's always going to be very shy and enjoy his alone time.

    Welcome to the bord. Good to have you :D
  5. Audrey

    Audrey New Member

    I had a LONG talk yesterday with the school counselor. She and the school psychologist observed difficult child for two days in the class. They are most concerned with impulse control. The constant touching, making inappropriate noises, sticking tongue out, blowing raspberries etc... when something or someone doesn't do what he thinks they should.

    He seems to get this way when in a large group, but in a smaller group, no problems with the touching.

    He has Sensory Integration Disorder (SID), he is gifted academically, he has little mantras and chants he repeats over and over. Sometimes as a reaction to loud noises or crowded places, sometimes for no reason.

    He is physically coordinated, no gross motor delay at all. We had trouble with feeding and potty training, getting himself dressed, problem solving etc. His speech is excellent, rather sophisticated. However, he has trouble with comprehension of facts. He can't give you the "why" to something only that it "is."

    I don't know if Asperger's is appropriate, but I do think there is a neurological defecit as far as the impulse control. He processes information very differently than the rest of us, so something on the autism spectrum wouldn't surprise me. Waiting for the psychiatric consult.

    Teacher emailed me this morning. She found a stress ball in the class she's going to let him try today. We'll see!
  6. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Stress ball helped my Travis alot when he was younger. He had big issues with personal space and touching as well. In grade school a nice long talk with the teacher....usually we could come up with something that helped. Never completely stopped the issue, but it made it a bit more tolerable. Often you have to get quite creative. :)

    Welcome to the board! :D

  7. 'Chelle

    'Chelle Active Member

    My difficult child had (has) this thing with pens. Now it's more just likes to collect them.

    For the touching thing, perhaps get him a funky pen that has different shape & textures on it (feathers, bumps etc.) Good to hold and touch etc. Only downside is if you get a click pen. My difficult child used to like to click it in and out, which just added another noise to the repertoire.

    The whole personal space thing is something that takes a while to work on, pretty much showing/explaining how close is too close to others. I think they're just oblivious to how close to anything they are, and don't get the same uncomfortable feeling of being too close to others.
  8. tictoc

    tictoc New Member

    My son is very touchy, too. In K, he had a "break table" where he could play with a stress ball or playdough. When he needed a break from working at stations, he could go to the break table with his aide.

    Now, in first grade, his desk is set up to help with his sensory issues. He has exercise bands (therabands) wrapped around the legs of his desk so he can push on them with his feet. He has velcro on the sides of his chair for rubbing and he has a stress ball and a "nubby" ball in his desk.

    These interventions have made a huge difference for him.
  9. Audrey

    Audrey New Member

    I love the idea of a "break table". The counselor things that his impulse control is going to be controlled with medications however the sensory stuff won't.

    I am/was a peds nurse for 18 years...dealt with a comprehensive Dr's office with a complete ADD/psychiatric area dealing with all kinds of kids. So, I'm not adverse to medications, but I'm no dummy either.

    difficult child seems to gravitate his touching to one particular boy who he wants so bad to be friends with. The constant touching, in my opinion, is his way of letting this boy know he likes him.

    I'm considering a play date here at home with the two of them, so that they can play without the stresses of a group of kids in a class setting making difficult child anxious.

    The stress ball today didn't go great. difficult child said that teacher gave it to him "to help me keep my hands in control. But, I just touched Lane with the ball instead of my hands." LOL
  10. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids dod have social problems and in a lot of cases it manifests as being socially withdrawn. But not in all cases. It's being socially INEPT or lacking social skills that is the hallmark. It is possible to find this in a kid who is socailly outgoing.

    difficult child 3 is outgoing. Perhaps less so these days now he has learned that other people are not there solely for his amusement, and tat if he approaches people too freely too often he will get slapped down. He's learned caution. But he will still confide intimate family details to total strangers. And they're not strangers once they know each others' names.

    Be wary of sterotypes. The goalpoasts are always moving.

  11. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Sometimes a weighted vest will help calm a over stimmed child as well. This helps K my 8yo. She is very inappropriate as far as personal space and moving and touching, the vest sometimes helps her. We had to go slowly with it so as not to induce any bad reactions. Some can only handle it for short periods also.
    Also sometimes a squeeze vest works. This with a squeeze ball, smooth or with the nubbies might help.
  12. Audrey

    Audrey New Member

    Actually, totoro...I was just looking at the "miracle belt" which is a weighted belt rather than a vest. I'm contemplating trying it, but not sure if he'd be willing to wear it to school. Of course, all the reviews are wonderful. It's good to hear someone say that it works without getting kickback from the company :). Thanks!

    The ball helped today a bit and his teacher moved tables today (first of the month) and purposely put him with two little girls. He's much calmer with girls. She felt that helped.

    Meeting on Monday morning with the school counselor, psychiatric and teacher. Message to a referred neuropsychologist doctor. today too. Hoping to get an evaluation. done ASAP! Need to find out what I'm dealing with.