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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 729003" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Hi Shery</p><p>Meth oft times will not show up on drug tests.</p><p>Read all you can about meth. It is highly addictive, one of those “one try” drugs and a person is hooked. It makes people feel like Superman when they are high, they don’t sleep for days on the stuff. Then, when they come down, they cannot function. Agitation and irritation are common.</p><p>My two daughters are on meth. They swore up and down that they weren’t, but the signs were all there. I didn’t see it.</p><p>They stole from our wallets, pawned what few heirloom pieces I had from my Nana since I was a child, stole their father’s stash of gold jewelry he had treasure hunted, 25 years. Gone.</p><p>Of course it “wasn’t them”.</p><p>They were classic in manipulation and triangulation, driving a wedge between my hubs and I. He was the good guy, I was the bad guy.</p><p>My eldest was diagnosed with depression before she used meth. Her sister was a wild child after puberty, hanging out with an older girl, smoking pot and who knows what else? She became pregnant at 15, then had two more of my grands with the same drugging, psychotic baby daddy. They were on and off the CPS watchlist, we had the grandbabies when they were taken away.</p><p> Both sisters were in and out our door for at least 10 or so years.........then I just couldn’t take it anymore. I was going down the rabbit hole with them.</p><p>Nothing we did truly helped them choose better. In fact, they got worse. Expected more, broke into our home, had a habit of just helping themselves to whatever they pleased.</p><p>They seemed to have needed to be out at all hours of the night. They had what I call the meth “uniform” dark glasses, baseball caps and hoodies. I was told that they wear this because their eyes dialate when they are high, the light hurts. They were like zombies at times.</p><p>Everything was my fault, <em>according to them. </em>I fell</p><p>for that for a while, searching the tapes and finding moments I wished I did better. Then I realized I did the best I could. Made mistakes, sure, who doesn’t?</p><p>Shery, be very careful with this. I know you want to help your son, <em>but he has to want help</em>, not just a comfy place to stay.</p><p>Lock up everything of value. Don’t let him drive, he is under the influence.</p><p>I am sorry for the flood of information. Take what is useful and leave the rest.</p><p>I just have alarm bells when it comes to meth.</p><p>It literally drugnapped my daughters. I have turned them back over to God. It is too much for me to handle. I pray all the time for them to find their potential.</p><p>After so many years of this, the chaos and drama, I realized that I am not the one to “cure” them.</p><p></p><p>If your son refuses to follow your rules and respect your home, what can you do?</p><p>Hopefully, he will.</p><p>Keep posting and letting us know how you are doing.</p><p>I wish I had a success story about my daughters meth use. They are still out there drifting.</p><p>It is not to say that other posters adult children will not turn the corner.</p><p>Just a gentle reminder to you and anyone following along to take care of <em>you</em>. Find a counselor, go to meetings, read up and build your toolbox.</p><p>This is hard, heartwrenching stuff and you must strengthen yourself for whatever lies on this path.</p><p>When you focus on your health, your stress level, enforce rules that honor the sanctity of your home, you are able to establish healthy boundaries. Self care is not selfish, it is what we wish for our adult children.</p><p> Guard your heart.</p><p>Keep talking with your husband and focus on your relationship. We can get so caught up and entrenched in the drama. It can become the number one issue, which is not healthy for a marriage. Try to be on the same page, but also understand that everybody has their own way of processing.</p><p>My heart goes out to you and your husband.</p><p>Prayers that your son hopefully is not on meth. Remember, it doesn’t always show up on tests, but there are websites to research and look for clues.</p><p>Many warm hugs,</p><p>Leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 729003, member: 19522"] Hi Shery Meth oft times will not show up on drug tests. Read all you can about meth. It is highly addictive, one of those “one try” drugs and a person is hooked. It makes people feel like Superman when they are high, they don’t sleep for days on the stuff. Then, when they come down, they cannot function. Agitation and irritation are common. My two daughters are on meth. They swore up and down that they weren’t, but the signs were all there. I didn’t see it. They stole from our wallets, pawned what few heirloom pieces I had from my Nana since I was a child, stole their father’s stash of gold jewelry he had treasure hunted, 25 years. Gone. Of course it “wasn’t them”. They were classic in manipulation and triangulation, driving a wedge between my hubs and I. He was the good guy, I was the bad guy. My eldest was diagnosed with depression before she used meth. Her sister was a wild child after puberty, hanging out with an older girl, smoking pot and who knows what else? She became pregnant at 15, then had two more of my grands with the same drugging, psychotic baby daddy. They were on and off the CPS watchlist, we had the grandbabies when they were taken away. Both sisters were in and out our door for at least 10 or so years.........then I just couldn’t take it anymore. I was going down the rabbit hole with them. Nothing we did truly helped them choose better. In fact, they got worse. Expected more, broke into our home, had a habit of just helping themselves to whatever they pleased. They seemed to have needed to be out at all hours of the night. They had what I call the meth “uniform” dark glasses, baseball caps and hoodies. I was told that they wear this because their eyes dialate when they are high, the light hurts. They were like zombies at times. Everything was my fault, [I]according to them. [/I]I fell for that for a while, searching the tapes and finding moments I wished I did better. Then I realized I did the best I could. Made mistakes, sure, who doesn’t? Shery, be very careful with this. I know you want to help your son, [I]but he has to want help[/I], not just a comfy place to stay. Lock up everything of value. Don’t let him drive, he is under the influence. I am sorry for the flood of information. Take what is useful and leave the rest. I just have alarm bells when it comes to meth. It literally drugnapped my daughters. I have turned them back over to God. It is too much for me to handle. I pray all the time for them to find their potential. After so many years of this, the chaos and drama, I realized that I am not the one to “cure” them. If your son refuses to follow your rules and respect your home, what can you do? Hopefully, he will. Keep posting and letting us know how you are doing. I wish I had a success story about my daughters meth use. They are still out there drifting. It is not to say that other posters adult children will not turn the corner. Just a gentle reminder to you and anyone following along to take care of [I]you[/I]. Find a counselor, go to meetings, read up and build your toolbox. This is hard, heartwrenching stuff and you must strengthen yourself for whatever lies on this path. When you focus on your health, your stress level, enforce rules that honor the sanctity of your home, you are able to establish healthy boundaries. Self care is not selfish, it is what we wish for our adult children. Guard your heart. Keep talking with your husband and focus on your relationship. We can get so caught up and entrenched in the drama. It can become the number one issue, which is not healthy for a marriage. Try to be on the same page, but also understand that everybody has their own way of processing. My heart goes out to you and your husband. Prayers that your son hopefully is not on meth. Remember, it doesn’t always show up on tests, but there are websites to research and look for clues. Many warm hugs, Leafy [/QUOTE]
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