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He's back. I am sad.
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 689188" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I am guarded, but underneath it...I am like you guys.</p><p>I think he will try. I do not know why but I do.</p><p></p><p>A few minutes ago, he brought up psychiatric medications, and his fears about them. (Horror stories, like chimpanzees going psychotic and ripping ladies's faces off???) And he ended by saying, I will try them...not the strong ones but....</p><p></p><p>I think this is a result of the fact that he is undergoing medical review for SSI, and he knows they will be looking at treatment compliance. But the topic that immediately preceded this was a mini discussion about the conspiracy theories--he still tries to push against my absolute boundary on that. I think he knows that it is not normal to feel the kind of pervasive, black depression he feels, coupled with the paranoia. The message here is that--he seems to be getting it.</p><p></p><p>So I mentioned, discretely, that finding a psychiatric medication that works is a process, a collaboration between doctor and patient based upon trust and care, and science. And I suggested he call Dr. B who was his psychiatrist when he was 11 who worked with us until about 7 years ago. I had spoken to him about 6 months ago and though he is now retired he would love to see my son. My son said he would go see him!!!</p><p>Yes!! You did tell me. I believed you, but I needed to hear it, too. Thank you, Darkwing.</p><p>Hi PiscesMom. OK. Let me put a preface. I am not against marijuana. Let me tell you my issues with my son's use of it:</p><p></p><p>--he spends nearly all his SSI on it.</p><p>--it becomes his only motivator.</p><p>--<em>after he uses </em>it he is morose, negative, more depressed, lethargic, defensive, and hostile.</p><p></p><p>He says when he is high, this is the only type he can escape his ego. He is hard on himself, filled with self-hatred. I can understand the appeal of a substance that offers escape from this state of mind.</p><p></p><p>Until quite recently we were tolerant of his use, until, we could no longer overlook what we saw.</p><p></p><p>When he did not use he looked and seemed happier, healthier, normal. When he did, he declined.</p><p></p><p>Of course, it is his business when he is completely independent of our help, what he does away from me.</p><p></p><p>Now, he is not. He depends on us for a place to stay and work. He also relies on us financially, a bit.</p><p></p><p>There are many people who use marijuana to deal with chronic illness and pain, or anxiety. In our state marijuana for medical purposes is legal. Bought through a dispensary, his consumption is legal.</p><p></p><p>I believe my son can function. He has before. I cannot give up on the idea that he will have a family some day, and feel some sense of contentment, and self-regard.</p><p></p><p>Right now, as his mother, I will not let that go. Marijuana to me, the way he uses it, works against his functioning, not for it.</p><p></p><p>I can see marijuana use, when somebody has a meaningful and productive way of life, fulfills responsibilities--and marijuana is something peripheral, not the main event.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 689188, member: 18958"] I am guarded, but underneath it...I am like you guys. I think he will try. I do not know why but I do. A few minutes ago, he brought up psychiatric medications, and his fears about them. (Horror stories, like chimpanzees going psychotic and ripping ladies's faces off???) And he ended by saying, I will try them...not the strong ones but.... I think this is a result of the fact that he is undergoing medical review for SSI, and he knows they will be looking at treatment compliance. But the topic that immediately preceded this was a mini discussion about the conspiracy theories--he still tries to push against my absolute boundary on that. I think he knows that it is not normal to feel the kind of pervasive, black depression he feels, coupled with the paranoia. The message here is that--he seems to be getting it. So I mentioned, discretely, that finding a psychiatric medication that works is a process, a collaboration between doctor and patient based upon trust and care, and science. And I suggested he call Dr. B who was his psychiatrist when he was 11 who worked with us until about 7 years ago. I had spoken to him about 6 months ago and though he is now retired he would love to see my son. My son said he would go see him!!! Yes!! You did tell me. I believed you, but I needed to hear it, too. Thank you, Darkwing. Hi PiscesMom. OK. Let me put a preface. I am not against marijuana. Let me tell you my issues with my son's use of it: --he spends nearly all his SSI on it. --it becomes his only motivator. --[I]after he uses [/I]it he is morose, negative, more depressed, lethargic, defensive, and hostile. He says when he is high, this is the only type he can escape his ego. He is hard on himself, filled with self-hatred. I can understand the appeal of a substance that offers escape from this state of mind. Until quite recently we were tolerant of his use, until, we could no longer overlook what we saw. When he did not use he looked and seemed happier, healthier, normal. When he did, he declined. Of course, it is his business when he is completely independent of our help, what he does away from me. Now, he is not. He depends on us for a place to stay and work. He also relies on us financially, a bit. There are many people who use marijuana to deal with chronic illness and pain, or anxiety. In our state marijuana for medical purposes is legal. Bought through a dispensary, his consumption is legal. I believe my son can function. He has before. I cannot give up on the idea that he will have a family some day, and feel some sense of contentment, and self-regard. Right now, as his mother, I will not let that go. Marijuana to me, the way he uses it, works against his functioning, not for it. I can see marijuana use, when somebody has a meaningful and productive way of life, fulfills responsibilities--and marijuana is something peripheral, not the main event. [/QUOTE]
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