Hey, Klmno....is something good going on?

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DDD, Apr 22, 2012.

  1. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    You sound so domestic in your recent posts, lol. Bee's and stains and talk of quitting cigarettes. Hmm..
    Positive stuff. with-o overstepping our family boundaries with too many questions, is it getting close to time to exhale? DDD
  2. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    LOL! Wow, DDD, that's pretty good detective work!

    My son is home- he was released on Friday. There are way too many details to go into- PO claims he "had power" to get him released in 1 week's notice and people all over Department of Juvenile Justice were working late at night to make it happen. Plus, the sd waived the requirement to go to a enrollment hearing to determione status with public sd. We have figured out that the truth was that it was a 60 day program and PO sc***d up- more and more points to that funding ran out last week and PO then discovered he couldn't make it last 90 days so he had 1 week to get a release in place. PO did clarify some things in the parole plan so I was more comfortable signing it.

    I take him to his mainstream school tomorrow to enroll. The problem remaining is that the only two valid classses he could take in detention was government and chemistry and now sd is saying they might not make the chemistry count and might not let him transfer into their chemistry class, meaning at best, he'd get 1 credit for this semster and that might mean he can't go to that forum this summer because he'd need to go to summer school in order to graduate next year.

    My son has been fantastic so far and I don't even want to refer to him as a difficult child right now- well, he has been a difficult child the time we've been together since getting local and released but not in the way we normally mean here on this board.

    We've had to do a lot of quick shopping and are getting ready to go get groceries so we can grill out tonight. :) He's on house arrest but is allowed to leave with me. We went to get library cards yesterday so he could check out a couple of books and get SAT study material.

    We are keeping the in-home for now- the current plan is for 2 more mos and he is keeping us both tthinking positive. I can see where me being positive has an impact on my son.
  3. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    That's great news!
  4. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Oh, that is really great news! :)

    I hope they can compromise with his classes. Although if he's not doing classes in detention, then what on earth is he doing in there? That just sounds like a waste of time. And if work done in detention isn't going to count for anything, then your typical kid (even a easy child) is not going to be motivated to do it.
  5. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Yes, school in detention is a joke. The Department of Juvenile Justice schools are MUCH better- the first one he went to was better than mainstream sd. The second one wasn't quite as good but probably sufficient. The detention center is a joke. He is supposed to take 4 classes ea semester in this local, mainstream sd for 4 full credits. If they would allow him to finish the year in chemistry and government classes, he can't really do anything useful for the other two class periods so I'm going to advocate for those classes and using the other two periods for catch up/make up work to make sure he had all the required classroom hours, school work, or whatever they feel is lacking. They might win this one but then what do they expect him to do for the remainder of the school year? And being he's under 18 and in 11th grade, they have to allow him to attend school. And he has over a 3.0 average in grades so it's a little hard for them to argue too much I think.

    Oh- he has 3 torn ligaments in his ankle. The detention school makes each kid take PE even though he'd already had his two years of required PE- why? because the detention center is required to give kids 1 hour of recreation/exercise per day so they have to use one class for that and they make the kid participate. He was play kickball or something and slipped, twisted his ankle and tore it up. So, at least they understand that he was still technicall in Department of Juvenile Justice custody, not a kid just in a detention center who was under parental custody so they are footing the bill for dr, xrays, etc.

    What feels great is that he is no longer anywhere close to being an adolescent- not a full adult but cleearly an older teen with good constructive goals. He owes no more restitution (I finished paying it off for his Christmas present since there was nothing else I could do for him) and he has no outstanding court cases and isn't even in the court system here. He's only on parole here because I moved here but he's on no cops' or judges' or GAL's radar whatsoever. If he towes the line, he can be off parole in 9 mos from his release date, which would be the day after his 18th b-day. The plan is to apply for college this fall and he's extremely motivated right now. I'm more in a tizzy over the sd issue than he is so he's extremely calm, patient, and level-headed right now.

    PS I don't mean to be ignoring others' threads lately but things have been really hectic and rush-rush lately and it will probably be that way a couple of more weeks. I let him pick out a mattress set on his day pass last Sunday, we found out Monday that PO was shooting for Friday as a release date, the mattress got delivered on Wed., my son picked out bed linens and bought toiletries on Fri. after his release, I bought him shelves, a desk, and a chair for his room today. His been very good about it being the inexpensive put-together type but that is the best I can do right now. He's putting new batteries in the smoke detectors right now.

    I'm getting ready to bake him a belated b-day cake (3+ mos late but better than never :) ) and then we'll start the grill for dinner.
    Last edited: Apr 22, 2012
  6. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Lol, my detective skills were honed by fifty years of parenting. :)

    I am so totally thrilled that you and your son AND the dogs are reunited and learning how to function as a family again.

    I won't even keep typing because you have someone more fun to chat with now. Hugs. DDD
    PS: Remember that online classes are free and available even for advanced placement level.
  7. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Yep- the sd is making issue over the lab time. Really, they told me they have only one chemistry teacher and this state requires 3 lab science classses to get a standard diploma, much less an advanced so the 2 chemistry classes they have are over-booked. The lab time has to be an excuse because Department of Juvenile Justice schools (not to be mistaken with detention "education") are acredited and NO Department of Juvenile Justice school has a big typical HS lab yet kids are able to get a state-acredited HS diploma in a Department of Juvenile Justice HS. It's really just another situation where I can't help it that the various state agencies are too busy covering arrears to coordinate a way to really meet state laws. If it's a lab class, there should be a lab. Now then- why are they claiming they can give an adequate education to kids in detention or Department of Juvenile Justice? on the other hand, if they aren't considered violent offenders and the state is claiming they have accredited Department of Juvenile Justice HS, how do you add that up? It's a much bigger issue than me. All I can do is keep trying to bring it to the fore front so people maybe will stop hiding in the sand.

    Dinner is finishing in the oven, my son is working on putting 'furniture' together for his bedroom. The cake is made and in the fridge- I've already warned him that it will take me a while to get back into the swing of things and be able to do a better job. LOL! Somehow I'm thinking he's going to take good care of the stuff in his bedroom now. I told him he can arrange it however he wants. He told me maybe it's better that he doesn't have a bigger bedroom like he used to- he said it seemed lonely and empty. The counselor is working on transitioning from adolescent way of thinking to young adult way of thinking. Whatever it is, I have my son back for right now and I am thanking God for it!

    I don't think child-rearing is an all-or-nothing (success or failure) anymore. I think it's about how much quality we can get in there whether they are 2 or 4 or 14 or 30. JMHO at the moment.
  8. Hopeless

    Hopeless ....Hopeful Now

    Very happy news :)
  9. Kimno - I don't know you yet but I"m very happy for you and your son right now. When I read that you were making a birthday cake for him and starting the grill for dinner it made me so happy I started to cry.
  10. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    That DDD is something extra special isn't she?

    klmno - I am so happy to hear what you said about your attitude. It shows in your homemaking, your posting - your everything!!! I COULD NOT be more PROUD of EVERYTHING I read about you doing and have done for your son and how you've worded it. It's amazing. YOU are an amazing MOm and you know I love my nephew. The strength between you two is like tungsten steel. With you for his Northern Star? He has a very good moral compass and I would suspect he's going to continue to follow your lead in life - for a long, long time.

    Congratulations on weathering the storm and coming out the other side - ship shape and then some. BRAVO warrior Mom!!!!!! What a great story for us all!
  11. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Such good news! I am very happy for you. It warms my heart to hear he is making plans for his future. Bravo! -RM
  12. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    "I don't think child-rearing is an all-or-nothing (success or failure) anymore. I think it's about how much quality we can get in there whether they are 2 or 4 or 14 or 30. JMHO at the moment."

    Wonderful sentiment, you sound happy. This is good news. Enjoy your son. Your plans for this evening made me smile. Hugs to you............