I have had little communication with my son for the past month after his dad dropped off his car (okayed by sober living so he could drive to work and start classes in January) and he decided to leave sober living and take a bunch of benzos that he got from a doctor, which resulted in him blacking out and totaling his car. Thankfully (and we now are sure he must have a guardian angel), he was not hurt, no one else was hurt and no property was damaged. He went back to rehab and is now again in sober living. Short version. He did talk to his dad a few times professing that he was so very sorry and was going to take it all seriously this time. Son and therapist called me about ten days ago and therapist impressed with him "breaking his door down" to meet with him. Admitted he was going through the motions last time. Son has new sponsor, is sick of it all too, glad he's there, blah blah. Told him we were devastated and he said that is why he has been leaving us/me alone. Me = neutral. I felt no news was good news. Last night he did a FaceTime with us. He is still not getting it. WTF is it going to take is what I want to know. He says he misses his bedroom and his dogs. He is 22! No you cannot come home!! He wants to be with us. His dad said you cannot hang out with us. You are too old. Okay then. So my little bit of hope that I would not admit to was shot done once again. Then he talked of his girlfriend coming from college 4.5 hours to visit him and maybe he would move there and live off campus with her and go to college. He said not now but maybe later down the road. We thought she was done with him. She is religious and does not party but in a way she is a crutch for him. I told him SHE cannot keep him sober. WE cannot keep him sober. Can he make it more than 3 months without an "episode"?? Husband got angry with him even asking such a thing. He was sent to Florida 1.5 years ago to get sober and get a 2 year degree. Has done neither. Husband reiterated all that has happened. I have to admit I was wincing a few times. I am going back to neutral and wait and see what he does. He wants to be with us but his actions push us away. I did tell him everything I have wanted to say to him last night and he heard it sober. Not sure if it will matter. It never does. It's all so sad.