His teacher sounds exasperated

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by TerryJ2, May 14, 2008.

  1. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    ...as am I.

    difficult child was supposed to work on a paper for school. He is writing about a famous sports person so it's not like it's torture.
    He was sick yesterday (as was I) and did not go to school. I saw him typing downstairs in the kitchen and have no idea why he didn't print it out, but told him I'd copy his work onto a disk and email it from my computer. (He does not have Internet.) When I went to copy it, I was alarmed that it was so short.

    Here is the teacher's response to my email and his attachment.


    C has not followed through and completed the assigned task. Friday May 9th the students where asked to finish writing the body of their paper over the weekend. C was absent on Monday and then did not bring his paper when he returned on Tuesday. What you have attached (the typed paragraphs) is not sufficient because it does not include the introduction, and body. C will be using some of his class time and recess to work on this process. He is having to start over because he did not bring any of his completed work to school. He told me he left it at home. To be truthful I am not sure what to believe any more. He has missed every deadline I have set for this paper. I am going to deduct 20pts before I ever read his paper due to his lack of responsibility. C will be starting with an 80 B- so he needs to make sure he does his best.
    KG :)

  2. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Terry, does he have an IEP? It sounds as if he needs support writing papers rather than punishment for not meeting deadlines. Has this been a problem in the past?
  3. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    This is an on-going problem for my difficult child 2 as well. He used to have a 504 to address his ADHD issues, but now has an IEP because of his movement disorder and mood disorder, and within the IEP we specify that he is to get modified assignments with regard to how they are presented (broken down into smaller tasks so he doesn't get overwhelmed), and how much time he has to complete them (he is allowed extra time without penalty).

    If your son doesn't already have a 504 or IEP, you should insist on one. And as exasperating as the situation is, and I'm right there with you in tearing my hair out, the teacher, the administrative staff, and you need to be working together, thinking outside the box to figure out how best to teach him, rather than punishing him for not fitting in the traditional mold. The goal is to EDUCATE. If the current methods aren't working, they need to be fixed.
  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Thank you. I wouldn't mind if he asked for help, but he's so argumentative and insistent upon his always being right that sometimes I can't even be in the same room with-him. So I let him reap the natural consquences.
    I don't think they have IEPs in private schools ... at least, not this one. It's an accelerated, college prep school, which is clearly not the right place for him. We were going to switch him over in 2 yrs but I'm already thinking that next yr will be h*ll. However, the emphasis is on leadership next yr, since the 5th graders are the "leaders" of the elementary school, and I'm thinking that the social aspects will make up for the struggle with-academics. Or not.
    I'm going to sit down with-difficult child and ask him to explain to me, in his own words, what he thinks an introductory paragraph is, and the body of the work. (She didn't say anything about a concluding paragraph but I may as well ask him that, too.)
    He's never been good at writing like this.
    Although they have the kids do journaling and he can write up a storm when he's in the mood.
  5. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Yeah, you're right about the private school not being required to provide an IEP or even a 504. But any teacher worth their salt should be interested in helping a child learn, and often those are the ones will automatically adjust their teaching style to give a child who struggles the support they need to succeed.

    It's only ging to get harder (as you probably know from your older child's experiences) once he hits middle school and beyond. Their organizational skills are REALLY challenged then, and any deficits they have will become glaring.
  6. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Sounds very frustrating. It does sound somewhat punitive. At the same time she may trying different strategies but if he is being as resistant at school as at home it can be very difficult even if she is adapting her teaching style. Just a thought. Hopefully she has given him plenty of examples but it sounds like he may need some one on one help which might be hard for her to provide especially with no IEP which means no aides or Special Education. teachers.
  7. Christy

    Christy New Member

    Did the teacher actually sign her intials with a smiley face after writing that?????

    I understand the frustration from both sides. As a teacher, I was baffled by the lack of effort that some students put into things and wanted to hold them accountable but as a mom of a special needs child, I know what a chore writing is for him because he has difficulties the mechanics or writing, forming sentences, organizing thoughts, etc...

    If your son is capable of better work and was just doing a half-a** job then good for you for letting him face the consequences. If writing is a struggle for him than you may want to discuss accomadations with the teacher.

    Hope your difficult child does better on the rewrite.
  8. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Did the teacher actually sign her intials with a smiley face after writing that?????

    Yes. I thought it was strange, too!

    I did ask him to explain in his own words, an introductory paragraph, body of text, concluding paragraph, and transitional sentence.
    He barely explained the intro, thought that the body was exactly 3 paragraphs because for this paper, that's what the teacher told him, and had no idea what a transition was. I explained it to him. Then at dinner, I asked him to tell husband. He couldn't. So I explained it again. husband tried. I think difficult child finally got it.
    I also explained that the body of a paper can be any length, depending upon the project, and that in this instance, just for this paper, it is three paragraphs, but does not always have to be.
    He is SO literal.