Today I am grateful for the things in my life that have helped me including this forum. I am still struggling to deal with the mess of my children's lives or more to the point, the effect it has upon me since I can't change what they do. I am grateful that for now anyway my son is in better spirits and a better frame of mind. Without drugs he is a totally different person. And I remember how lovable he was before the drugs and now I see that again. How long will that last? Also, due to the mistrust of the past I am afraid of being used so that is another part of my recovery, knowing how to set boundaries. And my daughter is still in Missouri, working a dead end job that barely gets her by but which is better than when she was homeless. She has been distant and not wanting communications, which I guess is her choice. But it kind of hurts me to know she can just blow off her mother and move on, but ok.