Homeschooling questions

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by tinamarie1, Nov 1, 2007.

  1. tinamarie1

    tinamarie1 Member

    I have brought this up before, and I just don't know what to do.
    Its the same song and dance this year with difficult child in school. I don't know why I keep kidding myself that he will have an ok school year. What always happens is that somewhere along the way, difficult child gets into it with another kid, the other kid has friends, they all gang up on him and have it in for him the whole year. If anything goes wrong, he is blamed, and because there are "witnesses" (ie: gang of kids who hate my kid), the teacher automatically believes them and will not even listen to difficult child's explaination or give him a chance to defend himself.
    His self esteem ends up in the toilet and he gives up completely.
    I am really considering homeschooling him. I have little faith in myself when it comes to being book smart though. And what if I can't handle him all day? *sigh*
    Please tell me, do any of you homeschool? Tell me the good, bad and the ugly that goes with it. And was it a positive change for your difficult child?
  2. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Welp............I did for 5 years.

    The good....he is 17, and not on drugs, running away, or in a gang.

    The bad....he is 17, and a recluse. He seems to have lost the drive to make friends and be part of a social setting. I am currently having to literally, push him back into a school setting in order for him to get his GED, go to college or vocational school, and go forward with his life.

    The ugly......I almost lost my sanity. He and I were always at each others throats.

    Overall........If I had to do it over again, I am not sure I would. It did stop his spiral of getting into trouble 24/7, but it did nothing for his self esteem. The only way I would do it over, is if I had a huge group of already established homeschool friends, we could hang daily with. We had many homeschool groups we were part of.........but it was not enough to fill the day...........and there were many, many hours in the day where he was alone, and isolated.

    Hope that helps?! I would go with what your gut says. You could always try it for a year, and see how it goes.
  3. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    All states should have a free o/l public school via the "no child left behind" theme. If you don't feel up to being difficult child's teacher you might want to look into such an option.

    I believe that if it weren't for homeschooling Nichole would not have graduated. I was skeptical at first. But since she was pregnant and they only let them attend classes til their late 7th month we had no other option.

    Nichole thrived in the o/l public school we found. She loved it. Her grades shot up. There were no more calls from the school over behavior and such. She was a bit more isolated, but her o/l school also included extra cirricular activities had she wanted to participate. They also had dances and even a prom.

    Because it was part of the public school system it was free, they paid our internet, provided her with the computer and all equipment. Nichole did it for her Jr and Sr years.

    easy child is already considering this o/l school for Darrin if ours continue to deteriorate as rapidly as they have been.
  4. goldenguru

    goldenguru Active Member

    I only home schooled for a short period of time(about one semester). My daughter was a sophomore in high school ... which would be a very different experience than home schooling a grade schooler.

    For us ... it was far from perfect. But, given what was going on in the public school it was preferable.

    Talk to other moms in your school district that home school. See if they have any networks - some communities even 'class share'. Some do homeschooling field trips, etc. So there can be some social interaction - which is important.

    Also, if you do go this route, be sure to get your curriculum approved by the public school AHEAD OF TIME. When and if you ever transition back to the public school, it makes the academic transition much easier.

    Good luck.
  5. Pam R

    Pam R New Member

    I've homeschooled our son always, except 2 very brief and very disasterous trials at school.

    You don't need to be book smart. You need to be smart about your child. Each child, even within a family, learns differently. You need to be able to teach how your child can learn. And you, not some teacher, knows this best. Who after all, taught them to speak, to know colors and animals, etc.?

    What if you can't handle him all day? I can't handle my son all day. But I was lucky in that husband has been home also (both of us disabled with chronic illness) through the worst of it and we tag team. But if you have any physical support system, you can make use of that. Have them take him to the library, the zoo, the museum, the afternoon activity, theater, music, the hundreds of cool things to do out there.

    A positive change for my son? His therapist who did all the neuro-psyche testing told us if he had not been homeschooled, he would not function anywhere near the level he does now. If he'd been in school, chances are he'd be involved with drugs, etc. because he'd have to kill the pain engendered there somehow. My son experienced the same horrible stuff you expressed.

    My son is now 16.5 and it's not any easier now. But I am glad I did it. I feel he has the skills he will need to survive out there, and what skills we can't teach, we've found outside places that can.

    So I can say, though a very hard row to hoe, I'm glad we persevered.

    Pam R.