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<blockquote data-quote="Weary Mother" data-source="post: 702427" data-attributes="member: 20487"><p>recoveringenabler: Thanks, I really am trying. I have seen on here people tell me that at my age I should just move on and enjoy life because it is too late. But, the pain of knowing that my 28 year old egotistical granddaughter is arrogant enough to think she can have a one sided relationship, dictate when she becomes unhappy enough to remove people from her life, including her grandmother, does hurt. I refuse to allow it to hurt long, but that is the problem the way I see it. A relationship should be two sided, communication back and forth with some respect. I had a grandmother who was very irritating, and hard to deal with. But I had many happy times with her growing up, playing solitaire, getting into her makeup and other things. I never would have thought even at age 28, to remove her from my life just because she was doing something to irritate me. When she died I was 47 and she was nearly 90, and I grieved her passing and still miss her even though she was not perfect. Granted this is a different type of thing, but it is the same respect or lack of it preventing my granddaughter to interact in an adult way. So, yes I do have a counselor, I see her several times a year and I have been seeing her for over 5 years. I saw her weekly for a long time, then monthly and now I am seeing her a few times a year and feel that it is working well. I could write a book on how much she has helped me. When I started going to her, my son was just imprisoned for the 1st time and I was devastated. As the time went on by, our sessions expanded to my childhood and other things that were driving my pain. My father died at age 55 after spending a lot of time in prison in his life. He died on the streets in Phoenix Arizona with nothing to his name and back in 1983 we did not have the internet or stuff like that and the police could not locate a good number to contact any of his family, so his death was not known to family and even though his name was known they could not find any family and was buried in a paupers cemetery. When I finally found him in 2012, I was devastated. So all this new stuff with my son in prison for a 2nd time, daughter on drugs and homeless has played into what happened with my own parents. But I am better and know I can survive this too. But the grandaughter just blew me away with her cold hard calculating attitude, thinking that she does not owe me the minimum of at least a discussion before eliminating me from her contact.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Weary Mother, post: 702427, member: 20487"] recoveringenabler: Thanks, I really am trying. I have seen on here people tell me that at my age I should just move on and enjoy life because it is too late. But, the pain of knowing that my 28 year old egotistical granddaughter is arrogant enough to think she can have a one sided relationship, dictate when she becomes unhappy enough to remove people from her life, including her grandmother, does hurt. I refuse to allow it to hurt long, but that is the problem the way I see it. A relationship should be two sided, communication back and forth with some respect. I had a grandmother who was very irritating, and hard to deal with. But I had many happy times with her growing up, playing solitaire, getting into her makeup and other things. I never would have thought even at age 28, to remove her from my life just because she was doing something to irritate me. When she died I was 47 and she was nearly 90, and I grieved her passing and still miss her even though she was not perfect. Granted this is a different type of thing, but it is the same respect or lack of it preventing my granddaughter to interact in an adult way. So, yes I do have a counselor, I see her several times a year and I have been seeing her for over 5 years. I saw her weekly for a long time, then monthly and now I am seeing her a few times a year and feel that it is working well. I could write a book on how much she has helped me. When I started going to her, my son was just imprisoned for the 1st time and I was devastated. As the time went on by, our sessions expanded to my childhood and other things that were driving my pain. My father died at age 55 after spending a lot of time in prison in his life. He died on the streets in Phoenix Arizona with nothing to his name and back in 1983 we did not have the internet or stuff like that and the police could not locate a good number to contact any of his family, so his death was not known to family and even though his name was known they could not find any family and was buried in a paupers cemetery. When I finally found him in 2012, I was devastated. So all this new stuff with my son in prison for a 2nd time, daughter on drugs and homeless has played into what happened with my own parents. But I am better and know I can survive this too. But the grandaughter just blew me away with her cold hard calculating attitude, thinking that she does not owe me the minimum of at least a discussion before eliminating me from her contact. [/QUOTE]
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