Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Hoping my visit isn't taking us all backwards
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="blackgnat" data-source="post: 631169" data-attributes="member: 13561"><p>Thanks, ladies.</p><p>The trouble is that I don't know anyone here in Colorado. I really don't have a lot of money to spend, either, so I can't go hog wild.</p><p>I'm staying at my ex's apartment (easy child lives here also) and difficult child is hanging out here. Normally he doesn't stay long because he doesn't feel welcome (past isssues, which I totally understand) so while my ex and easy child have been working, he has been taking advantage of being in this apartment. He says he loves being able to use the laptop (he could do that at the library) and just being able to hang out and that he knows when I go he can drop by, but not stay.</p><p></p><p>He also says he will be very lonely when I'm gone because he just wanders around all day-he has to be out of the shelter between 7am and 7pm. I realize that some of this is emotional blackmail because I hate the idea of him being lonely and unfocused. So I'm struggling with the knowledge that he'll be doing that.</p><p></p><p>But let me just process here-he is theoretically looking for a job. He has put 2 applications in while I've been here. He has TWO felonies, so I don't know how likely anyone is to hire him. Then again there's a call center that has been recommended to him and he hasn't been there yet. He DOES have one friend (from jail) who has a house and I think he sometimes goes there.</p><p></p><p>If he messes this up he will do 3 years in PRISON. He seriously has been thinking that maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Really. I just am afraid he is losing hope -doesn't have many coping skills, other than diving into the bottle or drugs. I just wish I could infuse some optimism into him.</p><p></p><p>Am I on the slippery slope of enmeshment, again?</p><p></p><p>I really have to sort out my OWN life! I just took early retirement but need to find another job. As I can't be here in Colorado (nowhere to live and it probably would lead to more codependent behavior on my part) I need to get back to Illinois. I feel I'm avoiding MY reality and skewering HIS by hanging around...</p><p></p><p>Does that sound like it might be the case?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="blackgnat, post: 631169, member: 13561"] Thanks, ladies. The trouble is that I don't know anyone here in Colorado. I really don't have a lot of money to spend, either, so I can't go hog wild. I'm staying at my ex's apartment (easy child lives here also) and difficult child is hanging out here. Normally he doesn't stay long because he doesn't feel welcome (past isssues, which I totally understand) so while my ex and easy child have been working, he has been taking advantage of being in this apartment. He says he loves being able to use the laptop (he could do that at the library) and just being able to hang out and that he knows when I go he can drop by, but not stay. He also says he will be very lonely when I'm gone because he just wanders around all day-he has to be out of the shelter between 7am and 7pm. I realize that some of this is emotional blackmail because I hate the idea of him being lonely and unfocused. So I'm struggling with the knowledge that he'll be doing that. But let me just process here-he is theoretically looking for a job. He has put 2 applications in while I've been here. He has TWO felonies, so I don't know how likely anyone is to hire him. Then again there's a call center that has been recommended to him and he hasn't been there yet. He DOES have one friend (from jail) who has a house and I think he sometimes goes there. If he messes this up he will do 3 years in PRISON. He seriously has been thinking that maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Really. I just am afraid he is losing hope -doesn't have many coping skills, other than diving into the bottle or drugs. I just wish I could infuse some optimism into him. Am I on the slippery slope of enmeshment, again? I really have to sort out my OWN life! I just took early retirement but need to find another job. As I can't be here in Colorado (nowhere to live and it probably would lead to more codependent behavior on my part) I need to get back to Illinois. I feel I'm avoiding MY reality and skewering HIS by hanging around... Does that sound like it might be the case? [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Hoping my visit isn't taking us all backwards
Top