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House Rules? Ideas needed
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<blockquote data-quote="Janna" data-source="post: 65376" data-attributes="member: 2737"><p>Yeah, I was wondering what Sara was, where's the consequences? When I did up a list like this, I had the rule there, but the consequence beside it. So, for example, if difficult child 2 was hitting someone, he lost all his electronic privelages. That way I didn't even have to speak to him really. I said, "Hands on" (meaning he is hitting), and that's all I said. He knew the rest.</p><p></p><p>I think your list is good, but some of it is probably going to be hard for a difficult child. Although, I, personally, don't treat my kids as difficult child's, they are treated as regular kids, and have all the rules of regular kids, but alot of kids here can't or won't or don't, so I think it depends on your child.</p><p></p><p>Hanging out with only who you approve of probably won't work. I hate all difficult child 2's friends, so there you have it LOL! Every girl he's interested in is repulsive to me. But well, he's 15, this is a different world, a different time, and he has to learn on his own. He isn't allowed to go out without my approval. He isn't allowed to sleep over anywhere unless I talk to parents. He isn't allowed on internet to "chat" unless I'm sitting right there. But, alas, I cannot control who he sees and talks to. 1) it's not fair and 2) it won't work. However, if it was a kid doing drugs, drinking, or in trouble with the law, I would probably change my mind and surely forbid it.</p><p></p><p>Some of the stuff, he's going to have to have natural consequences for. Example, if he doesn't attend school. Let them call the enforcement officer or whatever they do. Call the P.O. if he's violent, let him deal with it. </p><p></p><p>The biggest thing I will say is, don't have anything on the list you're not going to stick to. Because one time you renig, I guarantee he's going to think "I got em".</p><p></p><p>And checking the bathroom every day, hmm. How about just giving him one day through the week to clean it, and check it then. If it's his bath, and it's a mess, let it be a mess. I'm 36 years old and my bathroom isn't sparkling every day. </p><p></p><p>I think the routine with homework will be good, too. My kids do it as soon as we get home. The TV, computer, none of that is allowed to be turned on until ALL kids have their homework done. It was hard at first, but once they were in the routine, it was ok.</p><p></p><p>Good luck, I hope your difficult child is able to handle it all.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Janna, post: 65376, member: 2737"] Yeah, I was wondering what Sara was, where's the consequences? When I did up a list like this, I had the rule there, but the consequence beside it. So, for example, if difficult child 2 was hitting someone, he lost all his electronic privelages. That way I didn't even have to speak to him really. I said, "Hands on" (meaning he is hitting), and that's all I said. He knew the rest. I think your list is good, but some of it is probably going to be hard for a difficult child. Although, I, personally, don't treat my kids as difficult child's, they are treated as regular kids, and have all the rules of regular kids, but alot of kids here can't or won't or don't, so I think it depends on your child. Hanging out with only who you approve of probably won't work. I hate all difficult child 2's friends, so there you have it LOL! Every girl he's interested in is repulsive to me. But well, he's 15, this is a different world, a different time, and he has to learn on his own. He isn't allowed to go out without my approval. He isn't allowed to sleep over anywhere unless I talk to parents. He isn't allowed on internet to "chat" unless I'm sitting right there. But, alas, I cannot control who he sees and talks to. 1) it's not fair and 2) it won't work. However, if it was a kid doing drugs, drinking, or in trouble with the law, I would probably change my mind and surely forbid it. Some of the stuff, he's going to have to have natural consequences for. Example, if he doesn't attend school. Let them call the enforcement officer or whatever they do. Call the P.O. if he's violent, let him deal with it. The biggest thing I will say is, don't have anything on the list you're not going to stick to. Because one time you renig, I guarantee he's going to think "I got em". And checking the bathroom every day, hmm. How about just giving him one day through the week to clean it, and check it then. If it's his bath, and it's a mess, let it be a mess. I'm 36 years old and my bathroom isn't sparkling every day. I think the routine with homework will be good, too. My kids do it as soon as we get home. The TV, computer, none of that is allowed to be turned on until ALL kids have their homework done. It was hard at first, but once they were in the routine, it was ok. Good luck, I hope your difficult child is able to handle it all. [/QUOTE]
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