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Parent Emeritus
How did I not see detachment right in front of me?
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 703151" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>When I first started posting here...and really until late last year I think ... I had baby pictures of my son all over my office. I have had the same job for more than 22 years and literally had the same office for 10 or 15. So I had baby and toddler and photos all the way up to senior year high school. I had drawings he did when he was like 7 years old, in little frames on my walls. One day I realized, when I was at my lowest, that boy was who I saw. I would picture his caramel colored hair and big brown eyes and even how he felt when I'd nurse him at night when he was new and I felt like that child had DIED. I would be so torn up inside I would weep in my office...almost daily. One day I realized I HAD to quit thinking about him as a child and I took every picture and every drawing and I put them all away in a drawer I never used for anything. I have one photo left, of a trip we took to Chicago when he was about 12, which I don't sit facing my desk (I look awesome in that photo - it stays!)</p><p></p><p>It's been much better since that day. It's been much easier to think of him as an adult.</p><p></p><p>Not that I'm 100%. (In fact, I spent $50 on a sleeping bag for him today as he lost his - long story. I told him Merry Christmas.) But I'm better.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 703151, member: 17309"] When I first started posting here...and really until late last year I think ... I had baby pictures of my son all over my office. I have had the same job for more than 22 years and literally had the same office for 10 or 15. So I had baby and toddler and photos all the way up to senior year high school. I had drawings he did when he was like 7 years old, in little frames on my walls. One day I realized, when I was at my lowest, that boy was who I saw. I would picture his caramel colored hair and big brown eyes and even how he felt when I'd nurse him at night when he was new and I felt like that child had DIED. I would be so torn up inside I would weep in my office...almost daily. One day I realized I HAD to quit thinking about him as a child and I took every picture and every drawing and I put them all away in a drawer I never used for anything. I have one photo left, of a trip we took to Chicago when he was about 12, which I don't sit facing my desk (I look awesome in that photo - it stays!) It's been much better since that day. It's been much easier to think of him as an adult. Not that I'm 100%. (In fact, I spent $50 on a sleeping bag for him today as he lost his - long story. I told him Merry Christmas.) But I'm better. [/QUOTE]
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How did I not see detachment right in front of me?
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