Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
How do parents deal with the pain?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Tia" data-source="post: 677780" data-attributes="member: 19992"><p><span style="font-size: 18px">Thank you for your support and advice. I have been trying to figure this out for a year on my own. Trying to keep her positive and clean and motivated with her school work and now it has fallen apart again.My husband is on board with me <strong>now</strong> so hopefully we can support one another with our decisions. We tried to visit her this evening and she once again refused to see us. The hospital is protecting her privacy so she must consent to everything before they release any information to us. We do not believe that she was screened for substance use. </span></p><p><span style="font-size: 18px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 18px">Her older sister called her today and she took the call and asked if she could go live with her at her university dorm when she is released. We had already warned her that this question would come up and that she cannot allow her sister to move in because it will impact her life in a negative way. She told her sister that she was angry and couldn't trust her because I invaded her privacy by looking at her face book account. I am guilty of this but only did it because I was worried, she had been gone for two nights which she had never taken off overnight and I was going out of my mind trying to find her because she was not answering her phone or texts from us. She had taken off at 4 a.m. after I had awaken to find her stoned in the basement rec room with a homemade bong. This is when I found out she was using again after being clean for over 3 months. Then she went on a spree where she was most likely getting high all day. She came home to warm, shower, eat, get clean clothes and she brought a male friend the first night who she told us had been kicked out by his mom. The next evening she snuck him in after the two of them had a night of getting high and getting in trouble with the police. When my husband found him in the laundry room at 4 a.m. hiding he was asked to leave in which case she said she was leaving to if he couldn't stay. She then put on her dads boots, grabbed the car keys, she does not drive, ran out the door and started the car. Luckily I jumped in the back and turned off the car and removed the keys. Her friend convinced her to come back inside and they ended up both falling asleep. We felt that she was endangering herself and others and called the police. She did not co-operate and they handcuffed her and took her to the hospital. So this is where we are now while she is safe in the hospital.</span></p><p><span style="font-size: 18px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 18px">We have so much going through our thoughts, so many scenarios for when she is released. The most perfect one is accepting the help of the interventionist. If she refuses what do we do? We have made the decision not to give her phone back because it enables her to make all her drug contacts but are worried about her safety. She has used all her available money in the bank the rest are locked in investments that she has earned by working and joint with me so she cannot cash them in. I am fearful now being at home if she is released and decides not to stay and we will install a security system to protect our home. I know that during this short time we enabled her by giving her money and allowing her to come and go, please keep in mind that this is all new behaviour over the last two weeks. We know from reading and talking to different groups that we contacted for help that we must not enable her. It is going to be so hard because we are so scared for her to be out in the freezing cold of winter with nothing. Is what we are planning a bad idea. I have not been able to sleep and am so stressed out. I will continue to read any available advice.</span></p><p></p><p>Thank you for any advice.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tia, post: 677780, member: 19992"] [SIZE=5]Thank you for your support and advice. I have been trying to figure this out for a year on my own. Trying to keep her positive and clean and motivated with her school work and now it has fallen apart again.My husband is on board with me [B]now[/B] so hopefully we can support one another with our decisions. We tried to visit her this evening and she once again refused to see us. The hospital is protecting her privacy so she must consent to everything before they release any information to us. We do not believe that she was screened for substance use. Her older sister called her today and she took the call and asked if she could go live with her at her university dorm when she is released. We had already warned her that this question would come up and that she cannot allow her sister to move in because it will impact her life in a negative way. She told her sister that she was angry and couldn't trust her because I invaded her privacy by looking at her face book account. I am guilty of this but only did it because I was worried, she had been gone for two nights which she had never taken off overnight and I was going out of my mind trying to find her because she was not answering her phone or texts from us. She had taken off at 4 a.m. after I had awaken to find her stoned in the basement rec room with a homemade bong. This is when I found out she was using again after being clean for over 3 months. Then she went on a spree where she was most likely getting high all day. She came home to warm, shower, eat, get clean clothes and she brought a male friend the first night who she told us had been kicked out by his mom. The next evening she snuck him in after the two of them had a night of getting high and getting in trouble with the police. When my husband found him in the laundry room at 4 a.m. hiding he was asked to leave in which case she said she was leaving to if he couldn't stay. She then put on her dads boots, grabbed the car keys, she does not drive, ran out the door and started the car. Luckily I jumped in the back and turned off the car and removed the keys. Her friend convinced her to come back inside and they ended up both falling asleep. We felt that she was endangering herself and others and called the police. She did not co-operate and they handcuffed her and took her to the hospital. So this is where we are now while she is safe in the hospital. We have so much going through our thoughts, so many scenarios for when she is released. The most perfect one is accepting the help of the interventionist. If she refuses what do we do? We have made the decision not to give her phone back because it enables her to make all her drug contacts but are worried about her safety. She has used all her available money in the bank the rest are locked in investments that she has earned by working and joint with me so she cannot cash them in. I am fearful now being at home if she is released and decides not to stay and we will install a security system to protect our home. I know that during this short time we enabled her by giving her money and allowing her to come and go, please keep in mind that this is all new behaviour over the last two weeks. We know from reading and talking to different groups that we contacted for help that we must not enable her. It is going to be so hard because we are so scared for her to be out in the freezing cold of winter with nothing. Is what we are planning a bad idea. I have not been able to sleep and am so stressed out. I will continue to read any available advice.[/SIZE] Thank you for any advice. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
How do parents deal with the pain?
Top