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How do you guys develop thick skins??
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<blockquote data-quote="dreamer" data-source="post: 23887" data-attributes="member: 1697"><p>I never did develop rhino skin at all, not against the kids insults and not against any outsiders who seem to think they could do it all better. </p><p>Mostly over the years what I DID develop were rearranged priorities, better understanding, compassion and patience. My husband has several mental/emotional disabilities, some quite profound, and then I got ill myself and became bedridden and unable to do even the most simple daily hygeine etc for myself. Prior to that I worked as a nurse for Alzheimers and dementia patients in a long term care facility and later as a Hospice nurse....and those personal experiences changed me. BUT it6 did not come easy or quick. </p><p>My husband has been ill since 1990, my dtr has been ill since she was born,(1988) and I first got so ill around 1999......</p><p>The various types of disabilites and my experiences working in a dementia unit 20 hours a day 6-7 days a week affected me. SO did my best friends and mothers brain cancer. And my late first dhs brittle diabetes and related mood issues etc (and then his stroke, heart attack, loss of hearing and vision all before age 30) </p><p></p><p>I was at one time EXTREMELY "take charge" and "do it MY way" and "do it NOW" and was immaculate in my home, our lives, our schedule etc. Over the years I grew into what our life is now. Necessity is the mother of invention. For 2 years I could not walk, use my hands, feed myself, or anything, and with my very ill husband and kids, from my bed I could not MAKE them do ANYTHING. </p><p>Currently I am simply so happy to see we all lived thru that time.........(altho during that time, my mom died, my best friend died, 3 children very close to us died, all my uncles and aunts died,) I learned we would NOT die if the kids brushed their teeth their own way, I learned even if they do not brush their teeth they would not die. (and neither would I) I learned even if they play videogames, they can still learn what they need to learn to be "intelligent" and even if they have red and purple striped hair the grocery store chain in town will still hire them. I also have recently learned that my easy child and HER activities keep me every bit as busy as any difficult child and their needs, and I can find them every bit as unpleasant to me personally as all the difficult child stuff.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dreamer, post: 23887, member: 1697"] I never did develop rhino skin at all, not against the kids insults and not against any outsiders who seem to think they could do it all better. Mostly over the years what I DID develop were rearranged priorities, better understanding, compassion and patience. My husband has several mental/emotional disabilities, some quite profound, and then I got ill myself and became bedridden and unable to do even the most simple daily hygeine etc for myself. Prior to that I worked as a nurse for Alzheimers and dementia patients in a long term care facility and later as a Hospice nurse....and those personal experiences changed me. BUT it6 did not come easy or quick. My husband has been ill since 1990, my dtr has been ill since she was born,(1988) and I first got so ill around 1999...... The various types of disabilites and my experiences working in a dementia unit 20 hours a day 6-7 days a week affected me. SO did my best friends and mothers brain cancer. And my late first dhs brittle diabetes and related mood issues etc (and then his stroke, heart attack, loss of hearing and vision all before age 30) I was at one time EXTREMELY "take charge" and "do it MY way" and "do it NOW" and was immaculate in my home, our lives, our schedule etc. Over the years I grew into what our life is now. Necessity is the mother of invention. For 2 years I could not walk, use my hands, feed myself, or anything, and with my very ill husband and kids, from my bed I could not MAKE them do ANYTHING. Currently I am simply so happy to see we all lived thru that time.........(altho during that time, my mom died, my best friend died, 3 children very close to us died, all my uncles and aunts died,) I learned we would NOT die if the kids brushed their teeth their own way, I learned even if they do not brush their teeth they would not die. (and neither would I) I learned even if they play videogames, they can still learn what they need to learn to be "intelligent" and even if they have red and purple striped hair the grocery store chain in town will still hire them. I also have recently learned that my easy child and HER activities keep me every bit as busy as any difficult child and their needs, and I can find them every bit as unpleasant to me personally as all the difficult child stuff. [/QUOTE]
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