Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
How do you guys develop thick skins??
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="tiredmommy" data-source="post: 23931" data-attributes="member: 1722"><p>I like to think of my rhino skin as callouses caused by Duckie's behavior. :warrior: It still hurts when Duckie is hateful, but in a less intense way. I realized quickly when I first started coming here that I was going to have to get in front of this behavior before it became ingrained in how Duckie reacts to me (Duckie was only 3.5 years old at this point). I actually sat Duckie down at 4 years old and told her it had to stop, that it was hurting how we felt about each other. I told her I didn't want to not like her anymore :frown: and it helped at least some. I didn't want her to grow up to hate me. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" />I've virtually stopped yelling/nagging at this point and I can now tell her that I'm reaching my boiling point and she'll back down most times. :bravo: We (as a family) also implemented a team approach. We were Team XXXXX (our last name) and Duckie began to learn when she was on our team or Team Duckie. Team XXXXXXX was a much more happy & fun team to be on than Team Duckie. My husband also stepped up and told her she was not to speak to his wife that way (the wording is important because children often can't recognize that we have roles outside of motherhood/martyrdom :rolleyes:). We put a ban on the words "always" & "never" as in "You always!" or "You never!" :nonono:. That took away a lot of her steam. I instituted "Do to get", if she wanted something above the basic necessities she would earn it. :smile:</p><p>Fast forward to today, she had a play date after school. The kids made a mess in her room and I asked them to clean up. She told her friend it was their job to clean it up because they had the fun making the mess together. No fuss at all. Now she's not a easy child, mind you, but she's doing a lot better. :salute:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="tiredmommy, post: 23931, member: 1722"] I like to think of my rhino skin as callouses caused by Duckie's behavior. [img]:warrior:[/img] It still hurts when Duckie is hateful, but in a less intense way. I realized quickly when I first started coming here that I was going to have to get in front of this behavior before it became ingrained in how Duckie reacts to me (Duckie was only 3.5 years old at this point). I actually sat Duckie down at 4 years old and told her it had to stop, that it was hurting how we felt about each other. I told her I didn't want to not like her anymore [img]:frown:[/img] and it helped at least some. I didn't want her to grow up to hate me. :(I've virtually stopped yelling/nagging at this point and I can now tell her that I'm reaching my boiling point and she'll back down most times. [img]:bravo:[/img] We (as a family) also implemented a team approach. We were Team XXXXX (our last name) and Duckie began to learn when she was on our team or Team Duckie. Team XXXXXXX was a much more happy & fun team to be on than Team Duckie. My husband also stepped up and told her she was not to speak to his wife that way (the wording is important because children often can't recognize that we have roles outside of motherhood/martyrdom [img]:rolleyes:[/img]). We put a ban on the words "always" & "never" as in "You always!" or "You never!" [img]:nonono:[/img]. That took away a lot of her steam. I instituted "Do to get", if she wanted something above the basic necessities she would earn it. [img]:smile:[/img] Fast forward to today, she had a play date after school. The kids made a mess in her room and I asked them to clean up. She told her friend it was their job to clean it up because they had the fun making the mess together. No fuss at all. Now she's not a easy child, mind you, but she's doing a lot better. [img]:salute:[/img] [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
How do you guys develop thick skins??
Top