TiredSoul
Warrior Mom since 2007
Argghhhhh! I am exhausted and sick and tired of this constant battle! Everyday it is something. There is NO peace in this house - well actually this last weekend there was peace when difficult child and husband went on a weekend outing (that is rare). That was the first real taste of normal I have had since I had children. But aside from me moving out - I need some advice.
How do you handle the day to day defiance and refusal of your difficult child to do what they are told? Million dollar question there. Simple things too - like getting dressed, brushing teeth, washing face, combing hair - oh and then homework - and anything else we ask of him or expect him to do. NOTHING comes easy with this kid. Everything is a battle. Even getting him to participate in activities he says he wants to (sports, etc.).
I guess instead of wondering how to get him to do what we ask and end the power struggle - how do I cope with the reality of the situation and not blow my top? How do I take care of me and my health so I do not have a heart attack or cause an aneurism? My body feels like it is in a constant war zone. I clench my jaw so hard at night, I am surprised I still have teeth. My body hurts from never feeling relaxed. My health is deteriorating. This constant **** is killing me. I get 2.5 hours, 4x per week to myself - and guess what needs to be done during that time? Everything!! Because I can't get stuff done any other time. I have NO time for me. My husband and I constantly argue about who has it worse and who needs a break more. I feel like he gets a break just by getting out of the house and going to work for 9 hours per day. I am the one who gets the calls from the principal and teachers, and has to deal with the IEP meetings and doctor's appointments. I just want a NORMAL life.
The sad part is, I know difficult child wants a normal life too - and I feel like I have flipped out and screamed too many times - I just can't take it. I love him more than anything, but I am so tired, and sad, and feel hopeless. Oh and by the way, things were going really well for quite awhile - and then bam! it all starts up again. Nothing I can see that would have set it off either. No rhyme or reason.
Sorry for the vent.
How do you handle the day to day defiance and refusal of your difficult child to do what they are told? Million dollar question there. Simple things too - like getting dressed, brushing teeth, washing face, combing hair - oh and then homework - and anything else we ask of him or expect him to do. NOTHING comes easy with this kid. Everything is a battle. Even getting him to participate in activities he says he wants to (sports, etc.).
I guess instead of wondering how to get him to do what we ask and end the power struggle - how do I cope with the reality of the situation and not blow my top? How do I take care of me and my health so I do not have a heart attack or cause an aneurism? My body feels like it is in a constant war zone. I clench my jaw so hard at night, I am surprised I still have teeth. My body hurts from never feeling relaxed. My health is deteriorating. This constant **** is killing me. I get 2.5 hours, 4x per week to myself - and guess what needs to be done during that time? Everything!! Because I can't get stuff done any other time. I have NO time for me. My husband and I constantly argue about who has it worse and who needs a break more. I feel like he gets a break just by getting out of the house and going to work for 9 hours per day. I am the one who gets the calls from the principal and teachers, and has to deal with the IEP meetings and doctor's appointments. I just want a NORMAL life.
The sad part is, I know difficult child wants a normal life too - and I feel like I have flipped out and screamed too many times - I just can't take it. I love him more than anything, but I am so tired, and sad, and feel hopeless. Oh and by the way, things were going really well for quite awhile - and then bam! it all starts up again. Nothing I can see that would have set it off either. No rhyme or reason.
Sorry for the vent.