Terry, we found a simple computer game version of Monopoly, it was a lot easier to engage a kid in that. It also helped us avoid a lot of the arguments that Monopoly can cause when you play it as a board game, because the computer takes over as banker and dice roller.
I'm not suggesting you find our game; just that often computer versions of old favourites can work a lot better. Many of our difficult children are hung up on things being seen to be fair, and taking out at least part of the human element makes it easier. For example when I used to teach chess, I often set up a couple of beginner kids playing chess on computer because "illegal moves" needed to be taught in an obvious way, and the computer could be more vigilant than I could be, when I had a room full of kids all trying to learn at different levels. A kid would make a mistake, and the computer would simply be obstinate and refuse to move the piece to a wrong square. If the kids couldn't work it out I would be called over to sort it out and that gave me the opportunity I needed to explain why the move was illegal. "Pawns can't go backwards" or something similar.
Some years ago we found an Asterix board game on computer. It plays like a board game but is a lot more interactive. Most of the squares you land on, do something interesting or give you a puzzle. It is designed for up to four players and is not as much fun with only one person. It also gets you out of your chair for some of the games. And after playing for an hour, it suggests you take a break and go for a walk outside!
Orcaauntie, the three-way pull will happen with PCs too. Kids are different ages and/or developing at different rates and all have their wants and needs. Part of life is learning to accept that things aren't always perfect and you sometimes have to wait your turn, or let someone else have priority if their need is momentarily greater. Learning compassion for one another is also important but doesn't come naturally. But it is tiring, especially for older caregivers.
I remember when I had difficult child 1. I already had a baby, easy child was 20 months old when her brother was born. She was always a very self-assured child, only needed me when she wanted to be fed. Never cuddled. She was breastfed, but from a couple of months old as soon as she decided she was finished, she would push away from me and fight to be put on the floor.
Then her brother was born and he was a very cuddly baby (funny, for an Aspie). He would cling like a koala, it was a total opposite. And easy child noticed and I think began to wonder, "Maybe there's something in this." I would be feeding difficult child 1 and easy child would at that moment decide she wanted a cuddle. When you're breastfeeding one, having the other want to crawl into your lap is not welcomed. So I got her to use these times to sit next to me and I would try to manage to put my arm around her while the other arm held the baby at the breast. But if easy child wanted me to read a book at the same time, she had to hold it. My hands were full.
Another interesting thing happened - easy child wanted to try out all the baby toys and seats. She wanted to lie on the baby blanket on the floor and play with the toys on the hanging frame. She wanted to sit in the little chair and see what it felt like. So as far as I could, I let her try these things out. It seemed to give her a feel for how the world seemed from her baby brother's point of view. Once she had tried it, she decided it was more fun being the older sibling and able to run, play and climb. But until I let her try these things, she was whiny and demanding, feeling insecure because of the change in the family. Giving her a little space to explore the options made her realise that she was still who she was and she was still just as important to me, but sometimes a baby had to take priority in terms of needing to be dealt with immediately.
Kids need to learn that love is not linear. Love is more like fire - you can't really measure it, you can have multiple ignition points and each fire will burn differently but still warm you just as effectively if you look after it. You can take a burning log from one fireplace and start another fire, and have two fires which can be equally hot. The first fire won't suffer if you replace the log you removed with more fuel. The more you love, the more love you have to share around. But they don't all have to be loved in exactly the same way, because everyone is an individual and different.
Marg
She appreciates the advice I am giving her, which much of it has come from all of you wonderful people. In fact, she has already began implementation of some limits and today was a REALLY good day for the family- at least partially because of some of the advice she has received from myself. Despite the brief spaz moment from my Niece where she broke her phone, it was peaceful and all were in bed by 9. Well, at least in their rooms 
