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General Parenting
How do you handle failed classes (ADHD)? Do you take away anything ?
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 634097" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>Does outside play and other activities help him function or teach him skills or not? If they do help (like they certainly did with my son and many other ADHD type children I know) I would do my best never take them away. You don't take a wheelchair away from a kid, who can't walk, if they are not moving fast enough. Free play outside is often just as important for children, especially children with ADHD-type issues, for them to be able to sit down and concentrate on learning than wheelchair is for a paralysed kid to be able to get from one place to other.</p><p></p><p>You want him to learn, concentrate to things that actually help him learn. Things that help him concentrate to his school work and make it easier for him to sit still during the school day. Homework can be divided to smaller pieces and he can be rewarded finishing one portion, given some time to do other things and then do the next portion etc. School often is not very good at teaching kids to learn, if they are not learning standard way. Special Education. can help, but often most of work fall to parents, if child is not having actual learning disabilities. With child who has trouble focusing, sitting them down for long periods of time and being told that they are not allowed to do anything else till that huge pile of work they are not able to even organize enough to know how to start with it, is done, simply doesn't work very well.</p><p></p><p>And when you are trying to teach a new skill (like how to study), the best way to do it is through positive reinforcement. To be honest, the best results I ever got with my kid were when I trained him like a dog (meaning with new evidence based animal training techniques.) I didn't actually use a clicker, because I thought he would find it humiliating, but I worked around that and used a lot of techniques I have used with both dogs and horses and read lots of theory about.</p><p></p><p>Here are some basics of these techniques:</p><p><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operant_conditioning" target="_blank">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operant_conditioning</a></p><p><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reinforcement#Positive_and_negative" target="_blank">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reinforcement#Positive_and_negative</a></p><p><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clicker_training" target="_blank">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clicker_training</a></p><p></p><p>We did have a period of time, when we tried much more old fashioned methods, because his behaviour was so out of control. He was habitual truant and running from school several times a week, and he was just around ten at the time. We did take everything fun away, went all commando parent on him, because we felt we absolutely had to break that habit. It was unsafe among other things. Things deteriorate really, really fast and in the end we ended up with horrible situation. We should had known better, punishing and taking things that helped him cope or taught him skills away, had always had bad consequences before, but we had never gone so far with them and neither had he got that much worse so we somehow didn't see it coming even though we really should had. Very bad memories <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 634097, member: 14557"] Does outside play and other activities help him function or teach him skills or not? If they do help (like they certainly did with my son and many other ADHD type children I know) I would do my best never take them away. You don't take a wheelchair away from a kid, who can't walk, if they are not moving fast enough. Free play outside is often just as important for children, especially children with ADHD-type issues, for them to be able to sit down and concentrate on learning than wheelchair is for a paralysed kid to be able to get from one place to other. You want him to learn, concentrate to things that actually help him learn. Things that help him concentrate to his school work and make it easier for him to sit still during the school day. Homework can be divided to smaller pieces and he can be rewarded finishing one portion, given some time to do other things and then do the next portion etc. School often is not very good at teaching kids to learn, if they are not learning standard way. Special Education. can help, but often most of work fall to parents, if child is not having actual learning disabilities. With child who has trouble focusing, sitting them down for long periods of time and being told that they are not allowed to do anything else till that huge pile of work they are not able to even organize enough to know how to start with it, is done, simply doesn't work very well. And when you are trying to teach a new skill (like how to study), the best way to do it is through positive reinforcement. To be honest, the best results I ever got with my kid were when I trained him like a dog (meaning with new evidence based animal training techniques.) I didn't actually use a clicker, because I thought he would find it humiliating, but I worked around that and used a lot of techniques I have used with both dogs and horses and read lots of theory about. Here are some basics of these techniques: [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operant_conditioning[/url] [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reinforcement#Positive_and_negative[/url] [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clicker_training[/url] We did have a period of time, when we tried much more old fashioned methods, because his behaviour was so out of control. He was habitual truant and running from school several times a week, and he was just around ten at the time. We did take everything fun away, went all commando parent on him, because we felt we absolutely had to break that habit. It was unsafe among other things. Things deteriorate really, really fast and in the end we ended up with horrible situation. We should had known better, punishing and taking things that helped him cope or taught him skills away, had always had bad consequences before, but we had never gone so far with them and neither had he got that much worse so we somehow didn't see it coming even though we really should had. Very bad memories :( [/QUOTE]
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How do you handle failed classes (ADHD)? Do you take away anything ?
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