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Failure to Thrive
How Much Is Too Much?
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<blockquote data-quote="Mirabelle" data-source="post: 762263" data-attributes="member: 28712"><p>Thank you for your reply Simion and for sharing your story. I had actually read your previous post about your daughter today. Sadly it all sounds very familiar. We try and try but it always seems we are butting our heads against a brick wall that will not give. It sounds like you are working really hard to find an effective way to communicate with your daughter, as we have with our son. </p><p></p><p>My son will take no advice from anyone. When my husband tries to reason with him, it ends up being our fault that he has no job, no home, and no money. Our fault that someone ripped him off for $500. Our fault he was kicked out of a friend's place for keeping everyone up at night. I don't know whether this is pure gaslighting or his thinking is delusional as it sounds like your daughter can become. My husband retrieved my son's MacBook computer from the hotel after my son's friend called and said our son was trying to sell it for $100. Now it is our fault he doesn't have a job because we took away his computer so he can't apply for jobs. </p><p></p><p>Husband : But you were going to sell it.</p><p>Son : That doesn't matter.</p><p>Husband (and me) : WTF??</p><p></p><p>My son's bio mom has a Borderline (BPD) diagnosis. My husband has a dreadful time trying to communicate with her about their son because she is combative, dishonest, manipulative, nonsensical, and could start a fight in an empty room. I am so sorry you are experiencing this with your daughter, as well as trying to manage and heal from your own trauma. I am so glad my post gave you a little comfort. Knowing we are not alone helps. Best wishes moving forward in your journey also.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mirabelle, post: 762263, member: 28712"] Thank you for your reply Simion and for sharing your story. I had actually read your previous post about your daughter today. Sadly it all sounds very familiar. We try and try but it always seems we are butting our heads against a brick wall that will not give. It sounds like you are working really hard to find an effective way to communicate with your daughter, as we have with our son. My son will take no advice from anyone. When my husband tries to reason with him, it ends up being our fault that he has no job, no home, and no money. Our fault that someone ripped him off for $500. Our fault he was kicked out of a friend's place for keeping everyone up at night. I don't know whether this is pure gaslighting or his thinking is delusional as it sounds like your daughter can become. My husband retrieved my son's MacBook computer from the hotel after my son's friend called and said our son was trying to sell it for $100. Now it is our fault he doesn't have a job because we took away his computer so he can't apply for jobs. Husband : But you were going to sell it. Son : That doesn't matter. Husband (and me) : WTF?? My son's bio mom has a Borderline (BPD) diagnosis. My husband has a dreadful time trying to communicate with her about their son because she is combative, dishonest, manipulative, nonsensical, and could start a fight in an empty room. I am so sorry you are experiencing this with your daughter, as well as trying to manage and heal from your own trauma. I am so glad my post gave you a little comfort. Knowing we are not alone helps. Best wishes moving forward in your journey also. [/QUOTE]
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