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General Parenting
How worried should I be?
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<blockquote data-quote="beam-me-up" data-source="post: 682550" data-attributes="member: 20174"><p>I am sure she was not sexually abused but I know she was bullied by my ex and she is not sorry he is out of her life. </p><p></p><p>Although he had a totally western lifestyle when I met him 20 years ago (drinking alcohol, bacon sandwiches, nightclubs etc), over the years he has taken on the restrictions of his Muslim roots. He is very hard on her. To the extent that the time before last when he came home it was getting very explosive between them and I sent her up to live with my mother till he left.</p><p></p><p>Literally he was telling her she had to scrape her hair back and cast her eyes to the ground when she walked outside. He blew a fuse if she waved at a schoolmate. He was treating her like a servant too. Telling her to do this and do that while my son sat there in all his princely glory not asked to lift a finger. He'd take the boy with him everywhere but rebuffed her if she wanted to go somewhere and I remember one time her asking me why her daddy pushed her away when she went up to cuddle him.</p><p></p><p>She will barely speak with him on the phone now if he calls and quite honestly I don't blame her and do not make her speak to him. </p><p></p><p>I often wondered if there was something like bi-polar in him. He never hit any of us but there was a lot of glowering and oppressive looks. He sucked the life out of me with his mood swings and controlling behaviour. </p><p></p><p>I don't know what he meant about me being jealous of her. Just another put down. I heard a lot of them.</p><p></p><p> I thought I was finally free of all that but now, I wonder if P has that in her there is so much of him in these outbursts that its scary.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="beam-me-up, post: 682550, member: 20174"] I am sure she was not sexually abused but I know she was bullied by my ex and she is not sorry he is out of her life. Although he had a totally western lifestyle when I met him 20 years ago (drinking alcohol, bacon sandwiches, nightclubs etc), over the years he has taken on the restrictions of his Muslim roots. He is very hard on her. To the extent that the time before last when he came home it was getting very explosive between them and I sent her up to live with my mother till he left. Literally he was telling her she had to scrape her hair back and cast her eyes to the ground when she walked outside. He blew a fuse if she waved at a schoolmate. He was treating her like a servant too. Telling her to do this and do that while my son sat there in all his princely glory not asked to lift a finger. He'd take the boy with him everywhere but rebuffed her if she wanted to go somewhere and I remember one time her asking me why her daddy pushed her away when she went up to cuddle him. She will barely speak with him on the phone now if he calls and quite honestly I don't blame her and do not make her speak to him. I often wondered if there was something like bi-polar in him. He never hit any of us but there was a lot of glowering and oppressive looks. He sucked the life out of me with his mood swings and controlling behaviour. I don't know what he meant about me being jealous of her. Just another put down. I heard a lot of them. I thought I was finally free of all that but now, I wonder if P has that in her there is so much of him in these outbursts that its scary. [/QUOTE]
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