husband (almost) gets kicked out of Best Buy...

[gcvmom]

I swear he must be hypomanic right now. Apparently he got very loud and argumentative with a sales clerk this afternoon at a Best Buy. He'd taken his niece out shopping, and there was some signage about a product availability that was misleading, and he would. not. let. it. go. easy child and difficult child 2 were with him and they said he was over the top and embarassing. The store manager actually told one of the clerks to NOT help him after he would not shut up about the issue.

I'm not really too surprised because of his behavior the last couple of days that led up to today. He's obsessing about his favorite subject again (s-e-x), and on the drive up to sister in law's today he had absolute diarrhea of the mouth. Forty-five excruciating minutes of him in-cess-ant-ly talking, reading every friggin' sign for everything we drove by, and giving a running commentary on everything he saw and trying to be funny about it. If it weren't for the headache he was giving me, it might have been a little funny. But it just wasn't. It was all I could do not to snap at him -- but I'm starting to really see his illness for what it is.

Plus it turns out he forgot his medications this morning.

The argument in the store just confirms it for me -- he's nuts.

 

[klmno]

Spring AND forgetting medications- yep, that would do it. The kids will get over it- maybe difficult child can learn something from this, particularly. Sorry you've had to deal with it too, though. Have you tried a sock in the mouth?

 

[gcvmom]

The kids handled it pretty well -- and I told them it was okay to feel embarassed by dad's behavior, because it WAS embarassing and out of line.

As for the sock in his mouth... well, it seems it's already on his foot which he SO deftly wedged in there today!

 

[Lothlorien]

I'm just wondering if Risperdal would help? The combo of Risperdal and Trileptal help with Missy's mood swings and that AS-type behavior that your husband seems to be displaying .......just a thought.

Glad that the kids handled it well. My grandmother displayed similar things in public, at times and I just wanted to sink under whatever I could find.

 

[DammitJanet]

Oh I am so sorry! I have so done this a time or two!

I am on the rent-a-cop's bad list at Walmart right now because I got in a hissy fit with him over the difference in standing and parking...lol. We ended up almost coming to blows over that one. I do wonder how he would have kept his job if he hit a middle aged disabled woman with a handicapped parking placard? As it is he supposedly got reprimanded but I still see him out there playing parking lot rent-a-cop.

 

[gcvmom]

Loth, psychiatrist at one time said to me he thought something like Risperdal would likely be good for husband. But that would mean we'd have to get husband on the same page as the rest of us and admit that he has a specific mood problem. Essentially, I believe husband has to bring up the issue with the psychiatrist in order for him to address it. I don't think husband is at that level of enlightenment YET. He actually had an appointment on Thurdsday but cancelled because he came home sick. I'll probably have to make the call to get it rescheduled or he'll never do it. Anyhow, we can always hope and keep steering him in the right direction so that one day he actually gets the right medications in place.

Janet, the argument was a lot like yours -- splitting hairs and just not letting it go, and not realizing how ridiculous the whole thing was... until his kids and his niece pointed it out! Out of the mouths of babes, right? Why is it they can take the critique of a child to heart, but not one from someone closer to them (like a spouse or sibling)? Less of an emotional threat, I suppose.

 

[Hound dog]

(((hugs)))

Not fun for sure. Hopefully he won't forget his medications tomorrow. Maybe he's in need of a medication adjustment?

Janet......had to LOL at yours.

 

[crazymama30]

Guess I am fortunate as my husband does that with me, but he is way to anxious to do it with anyone else. But I hate it. I hope he can come to grips with what everyone else already knows. That is hard.

 

[rejectedmom]

My father was explosive and arrogant at times he had quite the reputation around the neighborhood. Most kids were deathly afraid of him and most parents just didn't like him. It made things hard growing up. I hope you can convince your husband that he needs the help of medicine and to go and get it. -RM

 

[jbrain]

My dad did embarrassing stuff like that too--I hated to go do errands with him. It also made it so that I hate confrontation of any sort, even if I am not involved. I hate witnessing it and will avoid it at all costs.
Jane

 

[gcvmom]

The fact that he's picking arguments with total strangers makes me really think this is a hypomanic episode. PLUS the fact that he was up until after 3am last night -- said he couldn't sleep because of stuff that was in his head (he's been complaining to me a lot about his quality of life = s.e.x.). We have Klonopin on hand that his sleep doctor told him to use when he first started his CPAP machine... he tried taking that to see if it would help him sleep. Didn't do a thing.

One good thing is that the Paxil he takes seems to keep him from getting really angry and explosive. He still gets argumentative and doesn't know when to back down once he gets going it seems. But he's not going off on the family like he used to, and that's a huge blessing.

Another thing I'm happy about is that our kids don't seem shy about exposing "the emperor's new clothes", so to speak. When I was a kid, I didn't dare speak out with my dad. He ruled by intimidation, whereas husband is not a bully. He's just clueless sometimes!


P.S. Just talked to him in the kitchen -- he confirms that his thoughts were racing last night.

 

[mrscatinthehat]

Hugs...not much else to add but hugs.

beth

 

[AnnieO]

Why is it they can take the critique of a child to heart, but not one from someone closer to them (like a spouse or sibling)?

I think this goes for a lot of people who are otherwise "normal". My Dad wore Speedos until the early 1990s. No matter what my mother said... It didn't work. So I bought him a pair of actual swim trunks, the shorts-kind that we called "Jams" in the late 1980s. Then difficult child 1 had to replace them when they wore out because he wouldn't throw them away!

Dad enlisted me, my 3 cousins and my aunt and uncle to pester Grandma about moving into assisted living place. It was mostly me and "E" who got it through. Although Grandpa falling and breaking his wrist certainly got that point across too.

That said I can see how a mood disorder would really make things unbearable. husband used to embarrass the **** out of me in public... I think he may be Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD), but of course I don't know that!

 

[Star*]

On one hand - I think best buy can be irritating because most of the kids they hire are either techno-speak in a language so far removed from common languages they aren't human or they are so uneducated about their products that you could pick up a box, do a quick read/scan and know more about things than they do.

As far as the s.e.x. thing - do you suppose that he could take estrogen? Be like the reverse of testosterone? (hey - hey - just thinking out loud)

I'm sorry you have a pirate that is nuts.
Sounds like he's stuck in Davy Jones' locker.

 

[gcvmom]

Hmmm... bc pills for the pirate! Yeah! Seriously, though, when his mood was stable on Lamictal, this problem went away. But he can't take that anymore, and his neuro isn't bumping up the Trileptal because he's not having seizures on his current dose.

That leaves psychiatrist. And since husband doesn't see THAT symptom as a problem (see, I'M the problem), it won't get addressed.

That reminds me... he needs to reschedule his appointment from last week!

 

[Wiped Out]

Just hugs-I'm so burnt I have nothing good to add. Maybe we need a getaway-me from difficult child you from husband and difficult children!