difficult child is now on half of her regular depakote and still stepping down gradually. She's up from 3-6am, which is a radical difference from her 24-72 hour periods of nearly no sleep while husband was deployed. The house is barricaded again, she's violent but not uncontrollable. Her evaluation with a psychologist who only does detailed evaluations has been bumped from 8/4 to tomorrow, which is fantastic. For the most part, this kid is a breeze compared to a year ago. Problem? husband wasn't here for the worst of it and thinks I have it easy compared to him. Granted I didn't spend the last 2 weeks trimming palm trees in 110+ degree weather while waiting for a new job to start, I have to stay up every night to get the housework done or I end up getting behind if I go to bed with him like he wants. I'm really trying to remain calm but it's becoming a challenge. I handle all the housework, cooking and cleaning. I make his lunches, do all the grocery shopping, and I get 3-4 hours of sleep a night if I'm lucky. I don't want this to be a contest, but I don't want to have my head bitten off at 3am when I ask him to put difficult child back in bed since she listens to him better at night... and I've only asked once. I don't want to have my head bitten off because he jumped out of bed before me the next night too. He really is turning this into some sort of a contest, comparing our 'jobs' and listing why mine is easier. Finally I asked him "Well, do you get a lunch break? two 15 minute breaks a day? a drive home when there's nobody around but you?" "Yeah" "Do you get to go to the bathroom alone? shower every day? talk to other adults?" "well, yeah" "Then you get more of a break than I could ever dream of. I really am trying to be the better person here, I keep reminding myself when he complains about how out of control difficult child is or how tired he is, that he wasn't here for the worst of it. I tell myself that no parent on earth can know just how bad it can get unless they go through it, to be patient with him. And I keep reminding myself that at least he's on board with taking difficult child off all medications and getting a new evaluation. I wish we had the time for some sort of therapy to stop this before it becomes a big problem, but husband is working 10-12 hour days, 6 days a week. The fighting after the kids go to sleep resembles a bad sitcom. How on earth can I put an end to this? I've tried pasting on a smile and letting him think I get 10 hours of beauty sleep a night but then he wants to know why I don't have the energy to go walk around the mall, or why I don't get all the housework done during the day. When I tell him I didn't get more than 3 hours of sleep the night before, he starts the "my job is harder than yours" game. Help, please tell me someone has dealt with this and has advice other than beating my head on a wall?