husband vs Christmas Tree...UPDATE

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by DDD, Dec 12, 2007.

  1. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    The Tree.......of course! Every single solitary year my husband and
    the annual tree go to war. Every single year the tree wins, at
    least for a day or two!

    We do not have a cheap tree stand. The tree was cut evently at
    the tree place. The stand has an interior water well that is adjustable as well as the killer screw things.

    :hammer: I "almost" wish I could rent my Ex for the "tree stand
    night"..he always won and never called the tree dirty names! DDD
  2. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    :rofl:Poor husband!
  3. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Well-Known Member

    We have a slightly unorthodox way of handling the tree. I hold the tree steady as husband tightened the screws. He then holds the tree while I tie the string (more like a thick thread) around the tree and to the small hook in the ceiling. We started doing that the year after one of my kitties took on the tree... and won.
  4. goldenguru

    goldenguru Active Member

    I have that song by Bobby Fuller Four stuck in my head. Ya know the lyrics - "I fought the law - and the law won". Well here's your version:

    <span style="color: #000099">I fought the tree - and the tree won.
    I fought the tree - and the tree won.</span>

    Hubby and I seriously considered a faux tree this year. In the end he wouldn't spend the money. So we too fought the tree.

    Enjoy your beautiful tree. The 'fight' is all a part of the fun.
  5. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    LOL! I have heard husband describe "the fight" in my ways but not one
    single time have I heard the word "fun". :rofl: DDD

    Alas........I have a second chance at "fun" tonight. :rolleyes:
    difficult child told me on the way to school this morning "I'll fix the tree
    when I get home!" :smile:
  6. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    There are certain things that couples do together that could lead to divorce and one of them is putting up the Christmas tree and stringing the lights on the house. Another is covering the pool...basically any large annual project could do it!

    One definitely has to have a sense of humor.
  7. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    I used to just look around the lot for little wedges. I'd grab them so I could have one the right size to prop into the stand. Worked like a charm every year and saved a lot of losing battles. (Newspaper in a plastic bag worked well, too.) He has my sympathy!

    Now, I have artificial trees. The only thing I miss is the smell of a real tree. Thank goodness for smelly candles.
  8. goldenguru

    goldenguru Active Member

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: JoG</div><div class="ubbcode-body">There are certain things that couples do together that could lead to divorce </div></div>

    Add wallpapering a small kitchen together. Honestly - I had the strongest urge to bury me exacto into hubbies flesh. (JK)

    Your statement just cracked me right up.
  9. Star*

    Star* call 911

    D3 - Um what types of things do you call a bad tree ?

    You dirty Scotch, You prissy pine, Had to laugh - a difficult child tree in a difficult child home - almost seems natural huh?

    And JoG - Putting on the pool cover could end in divorce? OH TRUER WORDS WERE NEVER COVERED...

    I have now developed a system where I can do it myself and DF will come out and go "Oh Honey why didnt' you call me to help?" and I think about what I WANT to say but what I really say is "I have a system that's not so hard."

    And wallpapering the kitchen? OH YES - At least DF saw the rolls of paper and said "I need to go NOW."

    Me trying to fix the fireplace would be another thing - I have never been able to build a fire that didn't come back in the house (DF's thoughts) so now I don't care if it snows in the den - he's the MAN.

    Thanks for the good chuckle :rofl:
  10. mstang67chic

    mstang67chic Going Green

    I definately have to agree with the divorce statement! LOL Once the lights and tinsel (I'm skipping the tinsel this year, don't feel up to it) are strung I'm fine. :lights: During the stringing however, I have the urge to wrap them around husband's neck. Tightly. But do I leave it to him and just leave the room? Noooooo...I HAVE to do it myself even though it turns me into a ranting psycho. We could just buy a pre lit tree but I HAVE to have a real tree every year. Last year we borrowed a fake and it just wasn't the same. Of course that could have something to do with the fact that the top section of the tree was missing and it just looked pathetic.
  11. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Starb</div><div class="ubbcode-body">And JoG - Putting on the pool cover could end in divorce? OH TRUER WORDS WERE NEVER COVERED...</div></div>

    Picture this:

    H, me, difficult child, and EXH covered our pool this fall! I mean, c'mon, when does something like this take place? I think we all wanted to kill H! I mean, I was siding with EXH for crying out loud!! bwwwaaahaaahaaa :rofl:
  12. Star*

    Star* call 911

    SIDING WITH X? :smile: :rofl:

    :hypnosis: You will leave the pool area husband, you will leave the pool area.
  13. mrscatinthehat

    mrscatinthehat Seussical

    Oh how do they get themselves (and us) into these things. I learned yesterday when husband is backing a trailer into a garage I am not to be the one to help him or we may have bigger problems later.

  14. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Grandpa

    Clark Griswold, at your service. "Lotta sap."
  15. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Grandpa

    <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: mrscatinthehat</div><div class="ubbcode-body">... backing a trailer into a garage I am not to be the one to help him ... </div></div>

    A long time ago I lived in Turkey. They have a system for directing a driver in backing up. The Turkish word for "come" is gel (with a hard "g") and for stop, dur. This is how it sounds:

    "Gel gel gel gel gel gel gel gel..." (very rapid chant)
  16. Star*

    Star* call 911

    HWGA -

    I live in the South and we go to mule pulls - the words for left and right are Gee and Haw....g with a ja sound and HAW with a haw sound.

    At any given time at a mule pull you can hear the Southern crowd yelling YE HAW, which doesn't confuse the mule attal - because he's waiting for that soft ja sound. Dur......
  17. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    :rofl: Sorry.......this is a sexist post! :rofl:

    Men will be men even when they are 75!! :smile:

    I quietly suggested that I get the neighbor to finish the tree for us (he's 40ish and works for Home Depot) and husband (who is very
    very softspoken) turned to me and said forcefully "ABSOLUTLEY

    An hour later he politely and sweetly said "would you come hold
    the tree on more time so I can get it straight?" :smile:

    In less than five minutes the tree has LOST and my husband had WON!!
  18. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    So glad the woman's touch did the trick!