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husband's hair-brained idea!
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<blockquote data-quote="Sue C" data-source="post: 9369" data-attributes="member: 87"><p>Fran -- I was a member of Mama Bear's Board which became the ODD Board, so I am an original member of this Board. I've always felt safe here. I tell you guys things my family and friends do not know. I know Suz and Abbey have always been here for me. I really do.</p><p></p><p>I am hurting right now from my situation with Melissa. If you recall, she did better after putting her in a private Christian school. She had her moments, but she was a lot better. She was better when we sent her off to college her first year which was 4-1/2 hours away. Summers she acted up again. When things were going well with her boyfriend, she was happy. Now she is sad and angry and takes it out on us. Heck, she's taking it out on herself by not applying for jobs when she knows she needs money.</p><p></p><p>I know husband and I are not handling the situation correctly with Melissa. I know many of you have walked in my shoes, but you don't know Melissa exactly. Angela put it recently, "Mom and Dad, Melissa will die out in the real world." Melissa is terribly dependent on us. She is emotionally immature. She is afraid to be home alone, so if we go somewhere, she leaves to go somewhere, too. The few--very few--times she remained home, she put on every light in the house and curled up on the couch to watch TV. She still sleeps on our bedroom floor (I know this infuriates some of you) because she is afraid someone is going to break into the house and kill her. I know she actually believes this. husband and I do think she has a mental problem such as perhaps bi-polar or something else. She was diagnosed with ODD and mild ADD years ago. She definitely has anger management problems. We tell her to seek out psychiatric help, but she will not. We cannot force her to.</p><p></p><p>Anyway, I waver back and forth between feeling like Melissa is at fault for the disorderly conduct ticket and vandalism ticket and for feeling sorry for her. Most of the time, I do not feel sorry for her....for anything. I know she brought these things on to herself.</p><p></p><p>However, I see other people post about their adult child going to court or jail and they are worried about it, and they get support here. I need support. OK, I'm in tears now and I hope husband does not walk into my office. (deep breath) OK, I don't just want a pat on the back and being told everything will be OK, but I guess I'm very emotional right now and need gentle guidance. Or maybe just an occasional hug.</p><p></p><p>I'm going through a rough time myself right now trying to find a part-time job. </p><p></p><p>Abbey -- I neglected to say in my other post that I realized you didn't mean to be mean to me.</p><p></p><p>Suz & Abbey -- I hope you will continue to be there for me and post responses to my posts. I know you feel like you are hitting your heads against a brick wall sometimes when you read my posts.</p><p></p><p>Janet -- Thanks for the support!</p><p></p><p>Here's hoping for a better day,</p><p>Sue</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sue C, post: 9369, member: 87"] Fran -- I was a member of Mama Bear's Board which became the ODD Board, so I am an original member of this Board. I've always felt safe here. I tell you guys things my family and friends do not know. I know Suz and Abbey have always been here for me. I really do. I am hurting right now from my situation with Melissa. If you recall, she did better after putting her in a private Christian school. She had her moments, but she was a lot better. She was better when we sent her off to college her first year which was 4-1/2 hours away. Summers she acted up again. When things were going well with her boyfriend, she was happy. Now she is sad and angry and takes it out on us. Heck, she's taking it out on herself by not applying for jobs when she knows she needs money. I know husband and I are not handling the situation correctly with Melissa. I know many of you have walked in my shoes, but you don't know Melissa exactly. Angela put it recently, "Mom and Dad, Melissa will die out in the real world." Melissa is terribly dependent on us. She is emotionally immature. She is afraid to be home alone, so if we go somewhere, she leaves to go somewhere, too. The few--very few--times she remained home, she put on every light in the house and curled up on the couch to watch TV. She still sleeps on our bedroom floor (I know this infuriates some of you) because she is afraid someone is going to break into the house and kill her. I know she actually believes this. husband and I do think she has a mental problem such as perhaps bi-polar or something else. She was diagnosed with ODD and mild ADD years ago. She definitely has anger management problems. We tell her to seek out psychiatric help, but she will not. We cannot force her to. Anyway, I waver back and forth between feeling like Melissa is at fault for the disorderly conduct ticket and vandalism ticket and for feeling sorry for her. Most of the time, I do not feel sorry for her....for anything. I know she brought these things on to herself. However, I see other people post about their adult child going to court or jail and they are worried about it, and they get support here. I need support. OK, I'm in tears now and I hope husband does not walk into my office. (deep breath) OK, I don't just want a pat on the back and being told everything will be OK, but I guess I'm very emotional right now and need gentle guidance. Or maybe just an occasional hug. I'm going through a rough time myself right now trying to find a part-time job. Abbey -- I neglected to say in my other post that I realized you didn't mean to be mean to me. Suz & Abbey -- I hope you will continue to be there for me and post responses to my posts. I know you feel like you are hitting your heads against a brick wall sometimes when you read my posts. Janet -- Thanks for the support! Here's hoping for a better day, Sue [/QUOTE]
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