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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 691509" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>It is the same for me Pasa. I am sorry this is so for those of us living with this bizarre circumstance. I don't think that folks who have not walked the path have any clue of what it is like.</p><p>What they do not realize is that most of us have done everything under the sun and more to search our very souls for a remedy. We have journeyed to the pit of despair, and still visit there every once and awhile.</p><p>The reality of it all is that unless our d cs want change and seek help, this is the life of their choosing.</p><p>I am humbled by your courage, Pasa. You are a brave warrior Mom. I know the pain of it, swallow it everyday and stuff it down with fervent prayers that my two will see the light. It is a fight every day, one step at a time to boldly go on with our own lives.</p><p>If only those "outraged looks" understood the outrage we suffer that our children have made choices that wound up with them living on the streets, in the park.</p><p>But, they don't understand, and that is okay. They have no idea that an addicted adult child in their home would lie, steal, manipulate, use and abuse their love for them.</p><p>Sometimes I open up and explain myself and this predicament. It may seem a "betrayal" to my daughter that I would be frank and forthright about her situation. Why should I be secretive and silent? "My daughter is on meth and chooses to live this way. There is no way I will have her in my home."</p><p>Boom. There it is. Truth.</p><p>I don't share this with just anybody, it is not their business. But, I do feel it is a story that validates the danger of this drug. I do feel at times that sharing it may help the next parent who may have to walk this path.</p><p>"They" don't know.</p><p>"They" don't know the bitter pill of the reality of this we swallow every day.</p><p>"They" don't know the struggle we faced and face</p><p>How we judged ourselves</p><p>Rolled the tapes of our parenting</p><p>Over and again</p><p>The grief we feel</p><p>For a child who is living this way.</p><p>"They" don't know</p><p>How we took our child in and tried in vain</p><p>Bargained our existence</p><p>To try to stop the madness of</p><p>This child hell bent on destroying</p><p>Their own lives and all who</p><p>Love them for a high.</p><p>"They" don't know.</p><p></p><p>"They" don't know how hard it is to say yes</p><p>And how hard it is to say no.</p><p></p><p>Well, we know.</p><p>Pasa, you are kind and loving and brave. You are a good Mom. May God comfort and strengthen you as you walk this path. "They" don't know, but I do, and I am here in spirit walking a similar path, holding your hand.</p><p>From my heart to yours dear, stay strong and be very kind and gentle to yourself.</p><p>(((Hugs)))</p><p>Leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 691509, member: 19522"] It is the same for me Pasa. I am sorry this is so for those of us living with this bizarre circumstance. I don't think that folks who have not walked the path have any clue of what it is like. What they do not realize is that most of us have done everything under the sun and more to search our very souls for a remedy. We have journeyed to the pit of despair, and still visit there every once and awhile. The reality of it all is that unless our d cs want change and seek help, this is the life of their choosing. I am humbled by your courage, Pasa. You are a brave warrior Mom. I know the pain of it, swallow it everyday and stuff it down with fervent prayers that my two will see the light. It is a fight every day, one step at a time to boldly go on with our own lives. If only those "outraged looks" understood the outrage we suffer that our children have made choices that wound up with them living on the streets, in the park. But, they don't understand, and that is okay. They have no idea that an addicted adult child in their home would lie, steal, manipulate, use and abuse their love for them. Sometimes I open up and explain myself and this predicament. It may seem a "betrayal" to my daughter that I would be frank and forthright about her situation. Why should I be secretive and silent? "My daughter is on meth and chooses to live this way. There is no way I will have her in my home." Boom. There it is. Truth. I don't share this with just anybody, it is not their business. But, I do feel it is a story that validates the danger of this drug. I do feel at times that sharing it may help the next parent who may have to walk this path. "They" don't know. "They" don't know the bitter pill of the reality of this we swallow every day. "They" don't know the struggle we faced and face How we judged ourselves Rolled the tapes of our parenting Over and again The grief we feel For a child who is living this way. "They" don't know How we took our child in and tried in vain Bargained our existence To try to stop the madness of This child hell bent on destroying Their own lives and all who Love them for a high. "They" don't know. "They" don't know how hard it is to say yes And how hard it is to say no. Well, we know. Pasa, you are kind and loving and brave. You are a good Mom. May God comfort and strengthen you as you walk this path. "They" don't know, but I do, and I am here in spirit walking a similar path, holding your hand. From my heart to yours dear, stay strong and be very kind and gentle to yourself. (((Hugs))) Leafy [/QUOTE]
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