I am moving to Washington

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Steely, Jul 16, 2011.

  1. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    So, in a 2 week whirlwind, everything in my life has come together. I feel really, really positive about.

    Two weeks ago I went to Oregon to see the place Matt wanted to live, be with my Mom, and scatter my Dad's ashes.

    The place Matt found was perfect, right around the corner from the college, and a bus ride to anywhere else. The public transportation is amazing in Portland. He already found classes he wants to take - which puts him in such a better position than he is here in po-dunk AZ.

    My Mom and I had an intense, beautiful time of bonding. All of my anger evaporated after being with her 2 days. I realized all of my anger was misplaced, and projected onto one of the last people alive in my immediate family. Illogical, but probably normal. She and I had a lot of fun, healing, and got closer than we had been, possibly ever. I was able to let my sister's death finally go, and not try and find the "culprit" while we were scattering my dad's ashes on the same mountain that we had scattered hers.

    My Dad's 2 brothers and their wives were also there, and it was nice to get to know them on a deeper more adult level. Although I might say it was equally as exhausting to "feel as if I had to entertain" them those 2 weeks. After the third day, I bowed out of most of their "activities" - which in the past would have been something I felt obligated to do.

    The first day that I got to Portland, I told my mom that I wanted to look for places to stay in XYZ towns. So the next day we took a road trip to look at houses. I cannot live in Portland, as it is too rainy and depressing. Plus I wanted to create a distance from Matt so that he was not just a hop, skip and a jump from me. So we went South East.

    We looked at like 4 or 5 houses, and I was feeling frustrated and confused. My Mom said, well, let's just go across this bridge and see what is there (which was in Washington). We drove into this extremely small town and accidentally stumbled upon the PERFECT house. We walked onto the 3 acre lot and could see Mt Hood from the yard. The porch wrapped around the whole house, complete with a hot tub. When I walked around the corner and saw that there was a detached guest room with a fenced in yard for when Matt came and visited with his dogs I got chills. It was just all so perfect - and we had not even seen the inside of the house yet. We called the realtor and toured the inside, which was not elegant, but yet perfect. And because we were in a super small town the rent was about the same as the houses we had looked at in the other towns. (Two miles over the bridge from this house is a good sized town, with lots of employment, and services, unlike where I live now).

    After talking about it, my Mom and I decided that the second room could be hers when she visited from Portland, and then she could have a WA address that would save her on taxes. From that point forward, she was ecstatic that she would once again have a NW garden to grow all of the things she grew up with on her farm when she was a kid. She even talked about canning again, something that I have not heard her talk about in decades, but she used to do even when we moved to Texas. It made me so happy to see her happy, and I thought my Dad must have surely had a spiritual hand in all of this.

    It was an amazing experience, and one, if it had been presented to me 6 months ago, I would have refused because "I need my own space". But being there, and in the moment - it was all right. She was so happy, and so was I. I mean this property is the most perfect thing, ever. She can have her space when she visits, and Matt can have his - and meanwhile the acreage is like an arboretum that looks out at Mt Hood. There are at least 25 different trees that surround the property. And Tesla, well, she will surely be in heaven:)

    So the rest of the trip we spent trying to take care of all of the details of moving - and now I am back in AZ for 2 weeks to wrap everything else up. I am not going to lie - I am pretty stressed out. There is a lot of work, that goes into moving (duh) - especially since I have done nothing but "move" my mom to Portland for the last 4 months !!! But I also have to step back and know this is all exactly how it is supposed to be. Once I get to the other side of this - I believe life will resume back to "the normal" it has wanted to be for so long.

    I will be 2 hours from my Mom and Matt - but yet - they can visit anytime. Perfect.
    And now, hopefully I will be able to find a job of some sort, and finish my book, while basking on the porch looking out on the mountains:)
    Thanks for all of your support and positive prayers.
    Last edited: Jul 16, 2011
  2. Mattsmom277

    Mattsmom277 Active Member

    What a beautiful picture of this home you have painted! I am very happy for you Steely. The time with your mom and family sounds perfect and I'm warmed to hear you felt close again and even more happy to hear you were able to let go of your losses. It has been a tough road for you to get to this place, and this new home sounds like a ideal place to plant roots anew and find your joy again. The yard sounds amazing and the view superb! I can see you there on the porch writing away with a cup of coffee and a look of contentment.

    I'm sure the next few weeks of packing and moving etc WILL be hectic, but what a great reason! What a great goal! Don't forget us when you get lost in your bliss ;) xo
  3. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    Your post is so utterly positive, it brought tears to my eyes.

    I hope the move goes smoothly and you're able to find the perfect job to go with what sounds like the perfect place to live. You found a way to both keep your distance from Matt and your Mom while keeping them close. I think that is so cool.

    I surely don't envy you the move though.

  4. 1905

    1905 Well-Known Member

    I'm so happy for you!!!!:congratualtions:
  5. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    It sounds absolutely lovely and perfect. I am glad everything has come together for you. I have followed your story for years through the heartbreak of your sister and your dad's passing. I am so glad that you have found peace.

  6. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I am so glad I turned the computer on. The joy in your post has put a smile on my face. Absolutely awesome. I will follow your journey with caring interests. Congrats! DDD
  7. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Sounds perfectly wonderful! Will it be easy for you to transfer your unemployment up there until you find something (which hopefully won't take long at all).
  8. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    I almost didn't read this post till tomorrow... But I am so glad I saw it tonight.

    Steely... It is such a joy to see you have some good stuff happen, and for you to feel good about it.

  9. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I'm so happy for you!
  10. keista

    keista New Member

    The house and property sound like a dream. Congratulations for putting the past to rest and moving forward.
  11. ML

    ML Guest

    What a great post. I am so happy for you.
  12. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    Steely, you have been in such "dark" places lately that I have worried about you. I think Dad and sister definitely had a hand in this. You deserve to have a new beginning separate but close to Matt and Mom. I am so glad I read this before I shut the computer down for the night. I envy the perfect home with the perfect view and the perfect distance. I hope and pray that all continues to go well for you and that you continue to heal. Sometimes big changes are what is needed and it sounds like you have found what you need. Congratulations and please do make sure and keep us posted about your "new" life. Don't forget us when things are going GOOD. We like to hear it!!
  13. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Thank you family, I am glad I have your support. It seemed like such a difficult decision to make until I was there, and then everything fell into place. Just every, single thing. I have not experienced this type of grace in my life in many, many years. It was really unbelievable. I kept turning around, and one more thing that I had been worried about for years (like finding a new place to live with my bad credit) was just "not an issue".

    My Mom completely stepped up to the plate, and over the top of it, to help me. Her former email about not wanting to "be responsible" for Matt, and her seemingly hesitant to have him move to the same city as her was suddenly a non - issue. Instead she was very excited to have what is left of our family all in one area. (My Aunt and Uncle and one of my cousins also live in Portland).

    She helped me coordinate the move while I helped her move her Dallas boxes from storage and unpack. That part of this journey is done! (yay!). No more boxes!! We were a team, just like we used to be, a long long time ago.

    I am not sure about my unemployment, I think it will transfer, or my Uncle seemed to think so at least. I will have to look into it. Although in AZ I only get a small stipend, and I am about to run out because AZ has refused accept Federal Support like the other 49 states. ??? Don't get me started.

    I feel confident I can find something where I am moving though, because there are 2 towns that are close together just a couple of miles from me, and they are all tourist towns. Meaning, lots of retail! I saw shop after little shop, so I am just going to assume that the career piece will also fall together.
  14. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Wow! What an amazing and beautiful turn of events.
    All of the work has been and will be worth it.
    The house sounds like a dream. Bravo!